[Patagonia]

Ive recently been diagnosed w/ PTSD & DDNOS on top of my depression. I started to work w/ 2 T's. One is a traumatologist & the other is an attachment specialist. We started parts work & 'mapping' these parts since April. The work is very slow going, difficult to understand & very tedious. I'm very used to CBT therapy.
Has anyone had luck w/ parts work? IFS? Think it's internal family systems? Has it been worth the effort? Is there something better you might recommend I can read about?
Thank you
Patagonia

[beans_on_toast]

Hi Patagonia,

I have been working with my parts and my T is trying to incorporate some IFS into the therapy. You are correct, as it is very slow work. T has mainly been focusing on trying to build trusting relationships with all my parts/alters at this point. They are coming to trust him and are more willing to come forward and share things with him. Things have been less chaotic inside since he has been able to build a more secure relationship with my alters. So yeah, I think it has been worth it, but it does take a lot of patience. There also is a lot of transference that has been playing out in the relationship that has lead to some of the most significant healing that has occurred so far, and a lot of that has to do in dealing with the attachment issues.

I have not done CBT, but I suspect that working with alters is very different then doing CBT. I wish you the best as you work with your parts.

[anderson]

learning to work together and supporting each other within helps out a lot.
we use CBT/ DBT skills to help control stress switching.

I have also done a lot of team building workshops that have helped us to work as a team.

this is how we look at it. have you ever did a 3 man leg race? If those within you keep going their own way, you will never win any races.

good luck on the team work!

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by Patagonia

Ive recently been diagnosed w/ PTSD & DDNOS on top of my depression. I started to work w/ 2 T's. One is a traumatologist & the other is an attachment specialist. We started parts work & 'mapping' these parts since April. The work is very slow going, difficult to understand & very tedious. I'm very used to CBT therapy.
Has anyone had luck w/ parts work? IFS? Think it's internal family systems? Has it been worth the effort? Is there something better you might recommend I can read about?
Thank you
Patagonia

my therapist and I didnt do a lot of what you call "parts work" as in my therapist and I mapping my alters, trying to get my alters to cooperate, trust my therapist , my wife, family or friends.

the short version is that almost all my alters were "categorical". what that means is each one of my alters had their own way of being, their own thought process, their own perception of their self, me, others in our lives, events/situations/environment...

because of this my alters thought, said and behaved the way they did because it was their job, purpose, reason for being.

example...

the IFS way is to promotes teaches getting along with each other, the environment, family/friends...trust each other and those outside the system of alters, boundary setting, ....

a therapist could sit for hours and hours trying to teach the self abuser in my to love and respect and get along with the body, host, other parts, my wife, family and others but because my alters are so categorical the outcome would not be the same as the expected outcome of IFS therapy......

with in me ... the alter who's job, purpose reason for being would continue to do their job of self injuring, their self, the body, me, others if they got in the way.

A therapist could sit for hours and hours trying to teach/set boundaries but if the alters job, purpose, reason for being was to get angry, swear/push others away/be non trusting then thats what that alter was going to do

nothing and no one was going to change/prevent my alters from being who they were, how they were, from doing their job,purpose, reason for being.

Instead of trying to change my alters to be the way my therapist /society/ my wife or I wanted them to be, my therapist and I just accepted the fact that they were who they were, were going to think, say and behave the way they were because thats why they were created.

we didnt even try to get any alters to trust or talk with my therapist. One time I asked my therapist if she was going to try and call out, bribe or convince my alters to trust and talk with her.. Her answer was...nope absolutely not. she didnt have to because the only way in which I got diagnosed with DID to begin with was because she and the psychiatrist that tested me had talked to at least two categorical or as the DSM IV TR called it distinct alternate personalities. whether I liked it or not the alters were already coming out to do their job, purpose, reason for being, interacting with people places and things just like any other person does. As a result of understanding alternate personalities New York State had moved away from the old time belief system that alters needed to be called out, talked to ...New York State's way of therapy for dissociative disorders where alters are present was to work with the host (the person in which the alters lived) and the alters will continue to come out and add their input when they are doing their job/purpose/reason for being, just like they have been since I was a very young child under the age of 5. I was very much relieved.

then we moved forwards to working on first stabilizing my daily life problems, then moved into working on what trauma issues I was able to work on. As I gained mental stability and was able to handle more the alters shared by way of things like painting, thoughts, images, voices, journaling, talking with my therapist. As I gained stability and was able to take over doing the jobs/purposes/reasons why the alters were created they integrated with me to become what we are now.....one whole person again.

[Patagonia]

I'm new in this part of therapy so I'm sorry if I'm not getting all the lingo right. My T uses IFS & how it relates to my 'parts' that surround my inner self. She said she doesn't like the term DID but I am somewhere on the dissociative scale. As of right now I don't have any alters but definite 'parts' that are seperate from me. I find it very confusing. I used to dissociate a great deal but I'm getting better w/ some new skills to stay present. I feel like I really have to fight sometimes to stay present. When I lose time does that mean I might have an alter? It makes me suspicious. I do notice in my journal that I change from 'I' statements to 'you' statements so I don't know if that means anything. I don't wanto read into anything, but also am trying to be more aware of what I'm doing.

I'm so very appreciative of everyone's posts here. They've been extremely helpful. I'm having trouble trying to find info to read about bec most of what I find is DID w/ alter info & I think I'm looking for DDNOS. I guess that could fall anywhere on the spectrum scale.

I don't think I fully understand attachment either. I try very very hard not go get any type of attachment w/ a T. I've had to stop seeing a male T bec of transference. Now I see 2 females & I can't even hug them when they offer bec I don't think I could stand to b touched. I want it desperately, but feel it could lead to me trusting too much & getting burned as always. I feel I have to keep a certain amount of walls up for self protection. I also feel that if someone touches me like my T I could have a total meltdown & that would b horrible. I can't let that happen.
Am I supposed to get attached to them on purpose? Are they supposed to fill in the gaps that a parent left open? I don't like that vulnerability.

Any ideas? Would live to hear them.
Thanks

[ThisWayOut]

I'm just starting to come to realize just how different my "different sides of me" actually are. Working with this new T and having to describe it all makes it a bit more apparent that they are mutually exclusive most of the time. I have not done anything with it all yet, but just working to build trust with her in general. I hope your work goes well. I too only find stuff about DID, and I do not fit those criteria, but have been dx DDNOS by a therapist a 2 therapists ago (only been about a year). We never really worked with it, as she dx shortly before I moved across the country. The intern I had did not focus on the PTSD so much as crisis management. I will get a chance to work more on all of it with this new T. Hoping it all goes well in the long run.
Sorry, I talk too much sometimes. Good luck.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by Patagonia

I'm new in this part of therapy so I'm sorry if I'm not getting all the lingo right. My T uses IFS & how it relates to my 'parts' that surround my inner self. She said she doesn't like the term DID but I am somewhere on the dissociative scale. As of right now I don't have any alters but definite 'parts' that are seperate from me. I find it very confusing. I used to dissociate a great deal but I'm getting better w/ some new skills to stay present. I feel like I really have to fight sometimes to stay present. When I lose time does that mean I might have an alter? It makes me suspicious. I do notice in my journal that I change from 'I' statements to 'you' statements so I don't know if that means anything. I don't wanto read into anything, but also am trying to be more aware of what I'm doing.

I'm so very appreciative of everyone's posts here. They've been extremely helpful. I'm having trouble trying to find info to read about bec most of what I find is DID w/ alter info & I think I'm looking for DDNOS. I guess that could fall anywhere on the spectrum scale.

I don't think I fully understand attachment either. I try very very hard not go get any type of attachment w/ a T. I've had to stop seeing a male T bec of transference. Now I see 2 females & I can't even hug them when they offer bec I don't think I could stand to b touched. I want it desperately, but feel it could lead to me trusting too much & getting burned as always. I feel I have to keep a certain amount of walls up for self protection. I also feel that if someone touches me like my T I could have a total meltdown & that would b horrible. I can't let that happen.
Am I supposed to get attached to them on purpose? Are they supposed to fill in the gaps that a parent left open? I don't like that vulnerability.

Any ideas? Would live to hear them.
Thanks

here in NY treatment providers use the term "parts" and "Alternate personalities" and "alters" interchangeably. meaning the words mean the same thing...

that may be the problem you are encountering with finding reading materials to fit what you are looking for...in my experience any books on dissociative disorders I have encountered all do the same thing...use the term parts interchangeably.

my only suggestion on getting past this problem is ask your treatment provider for info and reading suggestions...since your treatment provider and you are using the term parts in a different way your treatment provider will be able to point you in the right direction according to what your own treatment terms and plans are.

[Patagonia]

Thank you AmandaLouise for the post. It does make a lot of sense. I know I don't fit all the criteria for DID so I don't know if I have alters. From what I read some people say they just know. I do feel I have separate parts in me that have a voice.
When we do parts work we sometimes talk about a certain bad situation from childhood & what I used to "protect myself", then how these protectors are still functioning as I did as a child. It makes sense in a round about way.
We haven't really talked much about these other parts I feel I have, only really brushed the surface. 45min is never enough!

Thank you MdngtRain. I too am @ the beginning stages of all this. Started in May but other things have interfered so we don't talk about parts every time. Time is such a killer. How do I explore these other voices in 45min? Next to impossible.

Thanks all for posting! The info is so valuable.

[Whole>parts]

Hi
This is my first post. I joined to respond to this. I am doing parts work. It is not IFS. It is Phase Oriented trauma therapy and T also specializes in sensorimotor psychotherapy. Yes. It is very slow going. I've been working w him 2x a week for 2 years now. We are doing what he calls differentiation of parts. Of course nothing is completely linear, so stabilization (phase 1) continues and some Integration (phase 3) has begun. I think this parts work is amazing. If I'd had this 30 yrs ago I could've had a real life. Now I'm 53 and have like 5 comorbid debilitating physical ailments so its hard to stay motivated with therapy sometimes.
We also do a lot of attachment and transfwrence work. How can u not, I guess. It sucks. It's embarrassing and painful. I hate him much of the time, yet I also had a crush on him and sexual dreams and fantasies! It sucks to be so dependent on someone when it's not a real relationship. But it's pretty much my only relationship at this point.
I found out that T had studied under a certain teacher and that person had a book so I got the book without telling him at first. It is called The Haynted Self by Onno van der Hart. The book is very difficult to read but it is worth it if u can only understand 1/10 of it. It explains the difference between dissociation and fulll DID I did not know that my therapist considered me DDNOS before. There is also a workbook for people undergoing therapy for DID or DDNOS. I feel it is criminal that more therapists are not trained in this. I finally understand that the "voices" inside me, are parts. This is why I am always torn so many ways and have conflicting thoughts and feelings about everything what a relief to not feel crazy anymore. I'm a long way from done but I think this work is the best and really the only thing that has offered me relief and understanding. I often can talk to and amongst my parts now which is a great first step. I'm glad to hear others doing this work. I've not actually met anyone else who knows what it is.