How long before 1st therapist saw one of your Alters?

How long before 1st therapist saw one of your alters?

in order for me to answer that with out scaring you you might want to know something about dissociation and how it works....

dissociation is a normal reaction to things...its kind of like you know how if someone says something you dont like you feel mad, or if someone says something you think is funny you laugh....well dissociation is like that, something happens and as a result of that "something" your body reacts to that something by making you feel numb, spacey, disconnected...

those that have DID when they encounter that "something" the reaction is dissociating to the point of where an alter takes control.

here on psych central and in NY (my location) that "something" is called a trigger.

well therapy is all about talking about triggering things, learning how to handle/take care of those triggering things.

example in my therapy sessions my treatment provider and I talk about the abuse I went through, my feelings associated with that abuse, feeling depressed, suicidal and many other hard to handle (in other words triggering) topics/problems in my life..

which all adds up to whether I was aware of it or not from the moment I entered therapy up until my alters all integrated with me my therapist was having conversations with my alters.or in your words "seeing" my alters.

it was actually my treatment provider who realized I had alters and had me go through the diagnostic testing procedures for dissociative disorders. She did so because she had, had conversations with my alters before I was even aware of it....

example my first therapy session would be a series of feeling nervous, scared, unsure of meeting the therapist. I could not handle those emotions so I would dissociate and an alter would be the one to keep that appointment meeting with the therapist for the first time.

another example if something triggered me into having a flashback about the abuse I went through well the result was which ever alter who's job, purpose, reason for being was to handle flashbacks, or that abuse event, would take control.

one thing you need to know about DID type alters. they dont just appear one day. they are there from very early childhood taking over any time you cant or are having trouble handling something..it could be stressing out because of a test in school or even just going to school can be hard on some people, it could be a death, a health problem anything but the alters have been taking control regardless of whether a person is in treatment or not. some people know when their alters are in control and others do not, and some have a mixture of consciousness when their alters take control. it affects more than just therapy sessions. the alters take control in every aspect of a persons life ...occupational, social, and other important areas of functioning.

some people who have gone through years and years of therapy can learn how to do things like communicate with their alters, set boundaries/rules and such but its hard work and depends upon how much co consciousness you have with the alters.

if someone has dissociative type alters just going to the first therapist of their life will most likely make that person scared, nervous, anxious/anxiety ridden enough to where they dissociate into what ever alters who's job it is to handle those emotions and doctor / therapy appointments, just because dissociation is a reaction to being triggered.

if you think you have alters and that an alter took control during your therapy sessions you can talk with your treatment providers about diagnostic testing and how to be more grounded/relaxed in therapy so it doesnt happen so often.

Thanks that all makes so much sense. Just trying to find a doctor/therapist would always make me so much worse that I'd stop looking... But I went to and choose one, knowing this was a real possibility because of family history. I was a wreck leading up to visit. Couldn't even work the days before it.

During first session I had unusual experiences. Example: at one point I remember looking at her directly and wondering why I had been looking down/away. Had no sense of how long I had been doing that! Yet I know before I was talking about my childhood (least I think.)

I get the sense an alter talked to her - maybe even identified itself.

What I'm wondering is if an alter revealed itself to therapist in first visit (evaluation) is that a good sign for treatment?

Just so you know point I'm at. I know I cannot keep living like this. Someone reentered my life that sends me into bad state when I feel that person is not safe. Getting help is no longer an option. This week I even told an older relative who's been providing emotional support through some ruff times this could be the diagnosis - yet it still scares me (guess that's normal.)

But thinking of my youth, and extreme category my therapist put it in, that is probably the only way a child could survive.

Im sorry no one here can answer that question for you, only your treatment provider can say whether dissociating/becoming an alter is a good thing or bad with in you.

with in me my own treatment providers believe it was not a good thing for two reasons.....

because in order for a person to dissociate to such an extreme as becoming an alter that person has to have under gone extreme trauma as a very young child (here where I live and work demographics/statistics show under the age of 5. a child being emotionally, physically and often sexually abused is never a good thing.

because in order for a DID person to become an alter they must experience being triggered (something happening that causes the person to feel extreme emotions about things they are unable to handle) so instead of facing their problems/dealing with their problems they dissociate/mentally run away from their problems. my own therapist explained it by comparing it to a physical problem... if you have diabetes is it the right thing /is it good to ignore the problem/not take care of the problem then what do you have? a person who ends up losing their eyesight, amputated body parts one by one, and more and more and more problems when its completely manageable with diet, exercise and sometimes medications and sometimes with weight control, diet and exercise the diabetes sometimes ends up being cured.

my continuing to ignore the problems in my life by mentally running away from them only results in more problems.

for me having alters take control was never a good thing. it affected my social life, my academic life, my health, ....theres so much that goes into being DID and how it affects a persons life.

with in me it was not a good thing to have DID, to have alters taking control every time I was sad, happy, angry,...

again only your own treatment providers can say whether you dissociating to the extreme of becoming an alter is good or bad for you.

I think just take it slow. I have some alters who never speak to T or anyone! They will write to her though. In time, when we are ready maybe those parts will too. For us it takes great trust to allow parts to come forward. Mostly we do not trust given our childhood where unspeakable betrayal was "normal"

That all makes sense and I realize only my doctor can answer this. Just wish I didn't have to wait 3 weeks to see treatment provider again. But they are going to call if an opening comes up.

I went into evaluation knowing I would probably be diagnoses with this. I even choose someone I knew had experience with this. Who knows maybe it was a alter that was making me go. Knowing I can't keep living like this....

Seems like this condition would require a lot of brain power and energy to maintain things.

seems that way huh but it doesnt.....that is if the person really had the disorder. a person who has this disorder has been this way since before the age of 5 (according to the statistics and demographics here in NY) so for them it doesnt take a lot of brain power and energy to maintain it. but for those that do not have this disorder it is very hard and uses up a lot of brain power and energy.

a person who is DID well having alters and all the stuff that comes with DID just happens, its their normal. they dont have to think about how to act, behave, what alter should be handling this, what alter should come out during therapy when talking about this problem vs that problem.... its just done with out the host (person who the alters reside with in) having to think about it. the alters dont even have to think about which one takes control when, what this alter should say or do or act, how this alter should affect the past. the alters all have their own jobs, purposes and reasons for being created and because of this dynamic it just automatically happens.

it takes more effort and brain power for someone who is DID to stop using dissociation, and face their problems rather than the alters taking over.

to understand this take a habit you have had all your life/or a big part of your life and try to quit that habit. it may be sucking your thumb, or swearing, smoking, self harm behavior, ....try to quit doing that habit that you have done for so long.

being DID is like that a person with DID has been this way a majority of their life that its harder to break free of using dissociation than it is to do it.it takes more brain power and energy to go to therapy, take care of your present problems, learn new ways to handle the problems, learn grounding and other therapy techniques, live a life of being present in the moment ....

My T has never seen any alter because:

a) If you ask a Spanish therapist, psychologist or even psychiatrist what is DID, they won't know. Spain is a third-world country and mental health is often limited to BPD, bipolar disorder, MDD, eating disorders and schizophrenia. All the other mental disorders are seen as something either unreal or "too crazy to be treated."

b) We don't have a T lol.

Lifelies, that's terrible when your own nation disses your experience. Yet it's extensively so here in America, too, where DID is often ridiculed in the profession, but you can at least find some believers here.

I also want to say the first T that discovered my alter (one) was the psychiatrist on call where I was admitted to the psych ward with panic disorder. I was in and out of the hospital many times,for a decade, with mysterious, unbearable fear episodes. I didn't have a clue what caused it. But this certain psychiatrist would tell me every session that I had an "inner child" that I was ignoring and persecuting. He even said that in all his life he never saw someone so mean to their inner child as I was.

Gradually I got a hold on that idea, and started up a dialogue and negotiations with the inner child. I learned to respect her and treat her gently. After that, I never had to go back to the hospital. It was that important!

I just wish the professionals would get over themselves and realize that what a person experiences is what really counts. I do believe that the stories of "Three Faces of Eve' and "Sybil" didn't help our cause very much, as they were over-dramatic and sensationalized. They created a prejudice. But DID is a fact just the same, whether your alters are many or just one.

That is so sad with Spain.

I'm happy for you!

Plus modern shows like Criminal Minds where people with DID are rapist and killers. You'd think they would be more sensitive to furthering stereotypes.

did some checking on this for you....spain psychiatrists/psychologists and therapists do treat dissociative disorders.. and a full range of other mental disorders too.

the difference is that they use the IDC (and on rare occasions the DSM 5) in the IDC DID (and other dissociative disorders ) is called a .....conversion disorder....... you can find a full list of what dissociative disorders spain treats in the IDC under the coding numbers F44 through F44.9.

my suggestion talk with your treatment provider they will tell you whether they have chosen to treat these conversion disorders and if not refer you to a treatment provider that does.

T did see any - first she saw the dissociation (aka my deer in the headlights, nobody's home look). I don't think one came forward until T said to me "You were your father's mistress" OMG the alter was SOOOOOOOOOO friggen mad. Eyes flashed, danger crackled through the room. That was the beginning. so maybe 2003?

It was a few weeks because we didnt trust her.

This therapist, who specializes in DID and trauma, we were at the first session...and one poppd out after a few minutes- a five year old- and she said " i dont like you! I dont know you!" (Now she totally adores our t, but it was a rough start!)