Alter playing

What did you let an alter get to do today?

Mine got to use clear nail polish.

I don't let mine come out........am I bad? t says I can be like my punishing parent to them.

Awwwww. I don't get it. My alts make the system. The original ran away. I'm one then another, hence all the blank spots. I'm elected as leader, so I can allow...but I don't have total control, especially after a few drinks! Lol

You can control your alters?

before I was integrated I could not in your words ....let an alter get to do things. they took control when ever I got triggered/was unable to handle/do something. now that Im integrated there is no need for my alters to do anything because I am able to do /handle things on my own therefore they merged/became one with me.

Haha. I just did so. A he keeps taking it off and I keep putting it on. It's so pretty

Does this mean that alters did not come out to speak to your therapist or psychologist during the course of your treatment?

*Realize personal question. No worries if you would rather not answer.

Umm... well if you could just let your 'alters' play then you would be aware and then that wouldn't be DID would it?? DID is when you 'switch' and are unaware and cannot control it. Well, not unless you have had masses of therapy and are near integration? I mean, play therapy can help to make an alter feel safe enough to come out and play but with DID, it's not like you can control it like that! There needs to be a trigger normally, because ... of abuse and awful stuff. Just saying...

Absolutely. I was hopeful that there came a point in therapy where an alter could come out, the host would go away, or to a therapy agreed upon safe place, so the alter could share their story to the therapist. That was my personal question. Not speaking for anyone else.

Edit: Silly me. I'll ask my T! I like the jump the gun though.

my alters took control in therapy just like they did in other aspects of my life...

with me Dissociation is/was a reaction to my being triggered....no matter what part of my life ...academic, social, work, family and even during therapy if I got triggered/came up to something I could not handle my alters would take control and handle that situation based upon what their jobs, purposes, reasons for being were....

examples ....if I was at work and got stressed out/ could not handle something that was going on at work the alters who's job, purpose, reason for being was to take care of my work related problem areas would take control and do that for me...

if I was in an intimate moment with someone and we were doing something that triggered me/I couldnt handle the sexualized alters would take control and do that for me.

if I was in therapy and we were discussing something/hard/triggering/ which ever alter who dealt with what ever we were discussing would take control and take care of that part of the discussion for me.

when I was first diagnosed with DID I would worry about the fact that I could never remember what went on in therapy because I would dissociate (an alter would take control) during hard or triggering discussions but then my treatment provider explained to me that nothing happens after diagnosis that didnt already happen before diagnosis., that its pretty standard /typical/ usual that people with DID dissociate during therapy simply because of the mechanics of what DID is....having a special type of alters that take control to handle what ever the person can not handle on their own.

after that I didnt worry about when an alter would take control and I could not remember my therapy sessions. my therapist and I took care of this problem by recording my sessions. this way any time I needed to know what happened during therapy all I needed to do was ask and my therapist would pull out her equipment and we would watch the recording of the session in question.

my reply above was in relation to the wording of "letting an alter do something"

I didnt "let" my alter do anything. they just did what they did according to what their jobs, purposes reasons for being was. there was no my controlling what they did.

Im guessing what you are looknig for is called co consciousness. some people who have co consciousness set up a "safe place" as you call it. in fact its actually a therapy technique called visualizations where a therapist and a client can mentally make a safe place for the smaller alters to stay while the rest of the system deals with the harder stuff. your therapist can help you do that.

unless the host was co conscious they did in your words ...go away ....when the alters are in control.

everyones system is different in how much co consciousness they have some people have the co consciousness ability to feel dissociated but yet still have limited awareness when their alters are in control example like being a back seat driver, or watching as if watching a movie, floating on the ceiling, becoming like a wall or the mattress.... there are many different ways a dissociative person can be co conscious with their alters......

before the publication of the DSM 5 all levels of co consciousness was considered to be lopped in with the DID category. now those that are mostly co conscious (very little memory loss/amnesia when alters are in control) is called Other Specified Dissociative Disorder. those with mixed systems (sometimes co conscious sometimes not) and those that have no co consciousness (dissociative Amnesia symptoms) are called DID.

I copied this post from another forum. They had tons of positive responses.

I'm upset. I was forced to think about one of the many times I begged my "loving" parents for my life, begging, screaming, from the daily beatings., bouncing off walls as a 6 yr old, right when my bipolar went psychotic hallucinating switching,... I can't bare it, glimpses of intense pain.

I was just driving down the freeway in a dream, losing it. Blanked out. Can't focus It was scary. I'm distressed.

If that doesn't qualify as trauma, Im gone. I feel numb. :'(

I wish I was dead.

Even though I am not DID, I do have some experience with a good friend who is DID. And yes, everyone's system and how it works can be very different. There is no "wrong way" for a system to work. Comparisons are fine to make as an informational way of getting to know someone but no one should ever feel that their system, because it works differently is wrong.

In gaining co-consciousness for my friend, she is able to ask her alters to do things for her, like walking up stairs. There are a couple who are fit and strong and do not suffer from the physical ailments that my friend has. So when she has to carry something upstairs or she is in a lot of physical pain, she can ask them for help and they step up to help her.

She also has littles that like to come out and play or watch a movie. Unless she is severely triggered, she has the control now to either allow them to come out or not allow them to come out. They found out that when I was a kid I got a spirograph for Christmas one year. This year, they got me an really cool spirograph for Christmas and they can't wait to come out and learn how to use it. I know we'll have a great time playing with it!

And then, there are times when my friend switches and has no idea except that she lost time. Mostly it happens when she's getting a bad memory or there is an anniversary of sorts. It's happened less and less over the years as she has gained more co-consciousness with more in her system.

I just wanted to chime in so that ya'll could see that there are times when a DID'er can allow an alter to come out and her step back. Most of the time now when that happens she is able to listen to what is being said, providing the alter doesn't have a problem with that.

to all!

It hurts. I can't quit crying. I hope someone steps up soon.

Wtf. I hate how everyone beat each other up over what the DSM-5 says. A bible to some bible thumpers. Its written in stone, hah. It's just a copulation of some "thinkers" research for classification for insurance purposes of the mental illness spectrum. Nothing is definitive in mental health like a broken arm is a broken arm. I've never seen more "holier than thou" in any other field of practical medicine than mental health. A broken arm is a broken arm, but in mental health the "book" is constantly updated. So to take the position of "this is the way it is" is a delusion.

We know us, and that hurt, but were pass that now. You don't like it elitest, whatever.

Thanks!! You answered my question very well. I will talk more about it with T.

Im glad you got that. What did you get?

Part of me I know is suffering hurt, but I got it. We're good.

Apparently i missed some things. My thanks was aimed at amandalouise.
It seems like you're mad at her? I thought everyone had differing but valid points. Including you, AlwaysChanging.

Im not bad, but I felt I was de-evaluated, whatever. I spoke my points. For some reason I feel like I'm emotionally exhausted. I'm emotionally wore out and it hurts, not sure why but I have a good idea.

I protect my system and I can be quite the "b"

This was fun on the other forum

today i'm going to let 1 of the littles alicia watch the movie frozen

bless her, she thinks she's a princess- she's not watched it for a while, so..

she needs some time out after such a depressing christmas

I was so distressed yesterday and still am from recalling my abuse that I woke up with cut marks on my arms.

I'll get past it.

Sorry.

Hey there, Alwayschanging.
Everyone's system and everyone's mix of dissociation is what it needed to be for them. Yours is what it needed /needs to be for you. There is no need to justify it to anyone (and neither should anyone expect you to!).

I can relate to what you're saying. I used to let my younger alters out to have positive experiences, including play and time with the T. I used to get treats and presents for the little ones all the time. I am mostly integrated now, so this doesn't happen in the same way anymore. For what my opinion is worth, I think it is a GREAT thing to let child alts have time to play. For me it was a huge part of my healing process.

I do not need to justify my own experiences or my own diagnoses for any other posters here. I don't need to explain my level of co-consciousness, how many years I was in therapy, the extent of my abuse history, how my system worked, or how I was able to 'let them out' - to anyone.

If those ex-littles were around now they would poke out their tongues at all those nay-sayers out there and tell them to 'go suck eggs!' :P

I'm very recently diagnosed as DID so still talk about myself as if I am one whole - which of course I am in a way - rather than made up of lots of parts, some conscious of the others, some absolutely not.

So, yesterday I found myself buying a colouring book, a bit of a sophisticated one aimed at adults (but really just a colouring book) and today I coloured. It was nice.

Don't feel like you have to justify anything about your experience. Your experience is unique to you - no textbook can define your experience.

of course you will.. and we're all here helping you through

I allow little Suzy to come out and play, she's 7 years old i let her out to play with her stuffed animals or she ends up watching cartoons, like Dr. Seuss or Yu-Gui-Oh.
Her trigger is my fiance..she thinks he's her dad.
Me and my T are still working on that tho 😔