is reconciliation wise for me

There better be differences in how we interact. Becaseu if the old ways of doing things creep back in, then I am getting out.

We will continue with joint T and efforts wil be made to do things differently. When things come up that we do nto have th skills for then the T will be ther to help assist us.

I will also continue to see the T alone at least for a while to. She will be watchng me and how thigs are going. She will be the safe place I turn to in the event that things do not go well. She will be watching for what she see from me and from my kids and helping determine if she sees things going back to the way they were.

I am really happy to hear your assertiveness about how things will need to be, and about the safe and supportive resources that you are maintaining!

I go home this weekend. I need lots of prayers. I am as nervous as a cat in a room full of rocking chairs :}

Sending you prayers and strength

Thinking of you and will keep you in prayer

Thinking of you also & praying that your H's heart & mind will have changed enough to make it work & that you do feel the strength to stand up to the challenges that may still arise

Thinking and praying for you.

"Investigate your hidden assumptions."-Cornel West

Sending thoughts and prayers. A bit worried, honestly. xo

Things are going well. Of course it is day one officially. H has a busy week. We will cross paths very little this upcoming week. He has a meeting with church two nights this week, and I have sport stuff with the kids two nights this week, on different nights then his stuff. So it is just gonna be really busy. WE will have to just wait and see. He has told me several times over the weekend "It is nice to have my family back intact, I missed yall, It is so nice to see my little girl every day, and I hope we never have these same issues again, became I never want to go threw this again." I am not used to hearing that, and I don't fully trust that, I want to, but I can't yet. Maybe one day I can. Given my past with people who say I LOVE YOU and then don't ( CSA, and Rape, and spousal abuse) not real sure I can believe that for a long LONG time.

If it ends up being true, the new environment you are living in will slowly reprogram the neuropathways in your brain that were programmed from all the bad things. It takes time & work & living in the NEW environment to make that reprogramming happen, but if all goes well, there will be a day when you will look at & realize.....wow, I'm really there. I'm praying this will happen for you

Eskie - that is exactly what my T says. If things change with his behaviors then things will change in my brain. One day it will be like someone flipped a switch in my brain and I will have that "I finally reached my destination" kinda moment. I sure hope so.

It has been a week so far. Things have gone well. I have brought home a lot of boxes, and there is a lot of mess. There have been some moments of frustration. Mounting the TV on the wall, thats enough to drive anyone crazy, and teenager woes. A guaranteed frustration cause. I can see I have a lots of sensitivities. It's gonna take some serious effort and reprogramming to overcome these hurtles. I am confident my T can help me with this.

I am so happy for you! Hearing that your h is utilizing your church sounds like a huge factor. I love watching certain family members that maintain affirmations of their marriages and church is a large part of that. One of the marriages that I have in mind only recently, within the past couple of years have taken this path. A major health scare added to it, but they just celebrated 17 years of marriage. Was a rocky early mid point for them.

It takes time.