figures id do it again , ********graphic****************

I put it in my blog about what happened tonite. ate too much and purged. Well now that i did it i am thinking about what a classmate said in psychology. She use to be bulimic and had surgery so she could not gag. She tells me that 99% of bulimics die early. And is this the way i want to live. Truthfully i rather die than to gain anymore weight. Im 235 im still a fat cow. I hate my body, i hate the way i was when i was little. Eating so much junk food. I curse burger king and taco bell for making me fat. I hate my fat. I want to take a knife and just chop off my stomach and my thys and the flabs under my arm, oh not to forget MY FAT BUBBLE BUTT. Im sick of being a fat cow. I just want to starve and starve every fat cell in my body. Im pist that i cant loose my fat. Im pist that when i try to eat healthy i end up eating too much and PURGING. Im sick as hell of this. I just want to be thin. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK. 150lbs thats what i want to weigh. I must just accept that im a fat cow, i will allways be a fat cow, and will DIE a fat cow..


signed

the fat cow

((((((((((blackdragon)))))))))
Sounds like you are in the middle of some real intense feelings right now. I think often we choose something about our body to be unhappy about because it lets us focus our anger. Please keep yourself safe and talk to someone. You need some grace and compassioin.

i know how you feel.
i weight 225 and im considered obease.
i think i am fat i want to take a knife and cut my body fat off but i know there are people out there who like me for who i am. if you ever want to talk feel free to PM me
Amber