[coolbeans33]

I've been struggling with disordered eating habits for the longest time, probably about the past 5 years. If I'm not staving myself, then it's binge eating or bulimia. I've been to counselors and an in-patient treatment center once. (Then I came home and spiraled downhill)

I just don't know what to do anymore..it's like if someone doesn't physically force me to change, my life will go straight to hell. It already has. I'm failing all of my classes this semester, and one of them is one that I've already dropped out of before. I used to get all A's and B's in high school before I went insane..but now I just spend all of my time obsessing over food, exercising, and grocery shopping. It's like I'm an alcoholic or drug addict, but it's with food.

Like today I convinced myself that I was going to get caught up in my classes, then just wasted 5 hours buying food and eating it. And the entire time my hands were shaking (from caffeine), it was like I had no control over what I was doing. It's ridiculous.

This problem is completely ruining my life, and I really need help!!

[coolbeans33]

Has anyone been through some type of therapy that's helped them?. I'm open to trying anything (other then going back to the in-patient treatment center I tried once)

It doesn't only have to be directed towards food either. Anything that would deal with addiction or mental/emotional stuff might help.

I did make an appointment to see a counselor a while ago. and I'm still waiting b/c of course they always make you wait like 2 weeks just to see someone. just seeing a counselor doesn't seem like enough though..

[kaliope]

i hope you got a counselor that specialized in eating disorders. i would suggest being very honest with your therapist and following whatever recommendations he/she has to offer.

[waggiedog]

Hello dear Coolbeans. I'm glad that you've decided to come here and reach out because you obviously DO need some help and guidance for sure. I sooooo understand every single word you said, because I am, and have been addicted to food for the last 33 years and what's more I still am. It doesn't matter what the addiction is, because the end result is nearly always the same. Either you think you are loosing your mind or you think you're the only one in the world with this problems. It makes you want to isolate and is depressing, not to mention that it's phyically damagingng. I've been at each extreme of the weight span, hospitalised due to anorexia, then bulimia and then suicide bids because those problems got SOOO outta hand. I've had a lot of therapy, DBT and STEPPS (I have BPD) many it did help somewhat. You really need to see if you can get help, even if that help isn't especially for ED's, it still would help hunny. Do come back and let us know how you get on. HUGS again. Xxxxx

[nicole84]

I'm sorry I don't have any helpful advice for you, but I wanted to let you know that you're not alone. My ED takes on a similar form, and controls my life majority of the time. Who am I kidding, yeah all of the time.

It might be worth seeing a GP and getting a Pdoc referral? Medication isn't always the answer, but it can be beneficial. Honestly, I'm only just seeing one again now and not giving up hope. It's the underlying issues that we starve or b/p behind, and working on them is what can (hopefully) help us in the long term. Hugs.

[coolbeans33]

the counselor appt. is tomorrow, and she does specialize in eating disorders. I hope she has some useful advice, I'm losing my mind!

I know that I won't be able to sleep until 10 am and the hour long appt. is at 9:30..(it's 1 am right now). I'm not sleepless because I'm nervous, it's just like this everyday. I haven't slept normally in like 3 years. I pretty much live as a ghost b/c it's impossible to sleep at night, then I end up sleeping all day..I'm such a mess!

[nicole84]

Originally Posted by coolbeans33

the counselor appt. is tomorrow, and she does specialize in eating disorders. I hope she has some useful advice, I'm losing my mind!

I know that I won't be able to sleep until 10 am and the hour long appt. is at 9:30..(it's 1 am right now). I'm not sleepless because I'm nervous, it's just like this everyday. I haven't slept normally in like 3 years. I pretty much live as a ghost b/c it's impossible to sleep at night, then I end up sleeping all day..I'm such a mess!

I hope your appointment went well. I'm the same with not sleeping, my insomnia is shocking. Some days I can sleep a bit during the day, but only if I'm really medicated. I hate the morning appointments, I have one tomorrow actually to see my Pdoc.

[Fallindown]

Eating disorders are similar to addiction. I've done hard drugs and ana is right up there. Don't feel bad I've been in the hospital dozens of times.