Internet Addiction.

Tao:

I listened to a seminar by Dr Laird last year around this time. It was quite helpful, in understanding how addictions, including internet addiction work on our nervous system and otherwise:

Topics like:

The Role of the Nervous System
Technology Addiction is a Health Issue
Mentorship and the Nervous System

http://www.rosslaird.info/


Hope there is something new there for you.

Wow, that was very interesting. Makes a lot of sense.

I've been thinking for a while that I should get in swimming at school twice a week; I'd lose time to work on stuff, but maybe the time left would be more productive. But it still wouldn't fulfill the biggest thing that hooks me online - communicating with people. I don't have that opportunity anywhere else.

Not sure what part was interesting and made a lot of sense but I am assuming upping the activity levels. Combined with mentorship it might work and still be able to have some community here on PC.

For some reason, I am thinking for people over 21, in community, it might be more like sponsorship, like what happens in a twelve step programe. Someone you can email, call, write to, at any hour of the day or night, till you have some peace around it the addiction (and perhaps even after).

I liken it more to a food addiction than a drug addiction because of the fact that you have to use it for school, work and such, so you can never really get away from it, only admit your powerlessness. Have you ever read 12 steps.

I have K9 protection which blocks some sites. I have asked my partner to please block the political forum that is the most negative and addictive for me.

So when I'm home, no access to that. I also have asked my partner to set it up so that I can only have general internet access for a limited time each day.

I can still access the negative forum site from the library--but I do that less and less. I made a few posts there this week and that's that.

This seems to be a good site.

I'm using it to stimulate my writing. There are some things I need to write about--and sharing them here is helpful.

There are some things I need to write about--and NOT sharing them is helpful.

The brouhaha over the religious topics is helping me see that those writings should be completely private and not shared here.

Actually I found the whole thing interesting, but the activity was the most(only?) implementable. I've seen the 12 steps before... guess I should look them up again.

Well... my problem currently revolves around two sites - here and GaiaOnline - but I'm not willing to give up either... even if I did I'd just be moving on to the next thing. I have to work on time management, self-control, not letting depression lead to apathy and surrender. But it's so very hard.

Tao,

12 steps is likely the most practical and sensible. Helps keep things pretty simple. Hope it helps and by the way, it is full of people (community). I think I know what you are saying. If not this addiction which one. May as well face this one. It is such a new one though. There may not be groups out there yet.

For some reason I keep thinking about your original question and I am pretty convinced it is not about self-control or lack of it. No addiction really is. Not me or anyone else can control it or them. That is what you have been trying to do and it makes you and (me on other issues) a bit of a dry techie drunk, hmmm, not sure what it would be called.

So, for instance around a food addiction, I might say, admitted I am powerless over food, that my life has become unmanageable or something like that (which by the way is true). But since I have to eat as you have to use the internet etc there it would be modified. I am trying to get a response from overeaters anonymous but so far nothing.

Take care,

Tao,
I was just thinking about one more thing. I'm not convinced you are an addict.

So many University students wait till the last minute to do their homework, even the mature ones (I know I've been there).

Also, it seems to me that you are branching out now so you are taking steps. Swimming is such a fabulous sport too.

My advice to you, go, enjoy yourself. You'll do the work you have to, I know you will. Have some laughs and some fun with people you enjoy and maybe even closer to your own age lol.

See ya around,

I wish I had people to go do something with. I don't. And it's really not just procrastination... it's a need-filling addiction. :-/

- we all understand that feeling.

Here this post is.............

This is the challenge.........

I think again that you have to fill the void in your life that you feel - real human contact. If you had this you wouldn't be online so much. Do you have a new plan for increasing contact IRL?

No. I'm doing all I can for it. It just doesn't work out...

What are you doing exactly?

I'm in college, I go to the campus groups that I can. I'd been going to a church college group but have started avoiding it because I'm tired of being there and not connecting... I've been there 10 years...
And that's everything I have the chance to do.

What about working on the fine details of what is not working when you are trying to connect with others? Going to these places isn't enough work to improve things.............

Yes, but how do I do that?

You have to figure out what the problems are for you, the things that aren't working.

Hi Tao,

Ive struggled with this also, mostly getting to caught up in online groups. It not just the time on its what goes through my head when Im off. It just takes up to much space in my head.

a few summers ago I locked my laptop in a big box I have and gave the key to one of my cliets to keep for a week.

I felt like doing that again here recently. What keeps me from doing it is communication with a couple email friends and using it for other research things.

Instead of using the computer for work I could just hand write out everything.

is there anyway you can limit your access of the computer?

like a lap top that cannot connect to the iternet ? maybe away to remove the wireless connection ?

I have dial up .. thats a thought..... cut the phone line

my problem is when Im at home .
I guess the first step would be don't open the lid of the lap top.

from an earlier post.

Im fairly fortunate I have dance and skating that gets me out and interacting a bit with others . I attend a few 12 step meetings. I started going to a meditation group. I make myself go up and introduce myself to just one person I do not know and ask them about themselves how and when and why they started to come to this group.

Another outlet is volunteer work . if you can find something which you have an intrest where you can teach possibly that may place you in a role where you have the say in what and why your doing what your doing . this may lessen the akwardness of social situations because you'll be giving.

I'm about to join a womens knitting group geared for begginers . Its offerd at a place I get counseling at . theres already a instructor . I'd thought I'd check it out and offer another set of experienced hands and work on my projects at the same time and give something back to this location.

I'm not gonna pressure myself to enguage in talk . It will come eventually.

I recently saw three women training assitant living dogs . I would love to be a part of that kind of work . So much positive love and energy . so uplifting and it involves being around people as well.



Patricia

I'm not working... :-/

I have an internet class so I have to have access. I'm doing all the stuff I can outside of classes.

The internet addiction for me is a 'check out' phenomena. It's an avoidance method.

I get to avoid uncomfortable feelings by arguing politics on political forums which is a bit like engaginig in an interactive soap opera.

Hummm Tao,

try the blocking of sites programing,

try limiting the interactions on a site

have the site owners bolck your isp for a while

its a avoidance thing I belive as Sky dancer said .

limiting anything or stopping cold turkey is a loss . it has it own grieving process .

we all go through it.

have to do what we have to do to get better,



Patricia

Hi Patricia-

The K-9 protection device is free. I send my partner an email telling her what sites I'd like her to block, and what times I want to be on. Currently, at home, I'm allowing myself a couple hours a day, and I'm blocking the problematic sites.

I can't get too crazy looking for new sites because I have just so much time available.

This site works well for me.

It's still a forum, but at least the purpose of the forum is healing, and I'm in the company of people like myself, struggling with some symptoms (mine is PTSD) or a family member of someone who's struggling or a professional.

Overall, safer place for me to hang out with my various triggers.

Meh, I have the mindset of "I'm not addicted! I can quit anytime I want!" And I have been for extended periods of time without the internet, heck, my brother is addicted to video games moreso then I am to the internet. I spend most of my time on the internet, but if I didn't I'd probably obsess over something else (I do have some other hobbies after all). The thing that sets the internet with me and video games for him apart from everything else we do is that they are used as a primary form of escapism.

Also, I don't think I ever want the internet completely out of my life. I could see myself not using it nearly as much in the future, but the internet is used for a lot of things today like news and other stuff. Like having a TV, except you can do more things with it.

Yes, Tao, but what exactly about you isn't working. You can't fix anything unless you can first identify it.

i really don't understand why i don't work. i guess i'm not enough like them.

People that I have known who can't manuever socially IMO "don't work" because they are not "like themselves" enough, quite the opposite of what you are saying here............