Remembering past negative memories like they happened yesterday

Anyone have any negative memories that you can remember like they happened yesterday? I have this case where some things that people have done or said, I can remember it as if it just happened yesterday. I can still remember exactly what they said, their exact facial and body expressions, and even the location and time of day. I remember these negative memories as lessons to prevent the same thing from happening, but at the same time I find it odd that I can remember stuff that happened many years ago like it happened yesterday.

For example, during my freshmen year of high school, at the end of the school year, a female friend at that time seemed to be growing more distant from me. I asked if anything was wrong and she said no but I had a feeling there really was something wrong. I let it go and ignored my gut intuition. I was way more naive back then. Then, on the last day of school, I saw her in the hall as I was coming the opposite direction to go to class that was a few feet away. That's when she blew up. She said I was very annoying, even though she always chose to sit with me at lunch. She said she was so sick of me and asked why I walked with her to class a couple times even though she had asked me to. I told her I only did it because she wanted me to and she said she didn't know what I was talking about and said she had to go to class. She quickly went into a classroom. That was the last time we really talked. There was no closure and no real explanation of what really went wrong.

She had asked me a couple times before that happened to walk with her to class after our lunch period, even though it was very inconvenient for me to and I even told her that but I did it anyway just to be a good friend since I thought she was upset about something and wanted to talk. I later found out that she really only befriended me out of pity. That is part of the reason I am the way I am today. I hate it when people befriend me out of pity for this reason. This false friend obviously didn't like me, but hung out with me anyway and even invited me to her house one time after school. I can still remember this happening like it happened yesterday. I was in total shock. I had asked her before then if something was wrong and she said no, when obviously there was something wrong. This is one of the biggest reasons I also have trust issues with others now. I try very hard to ensure this scenario never happens again. It may sound weird but I feel like it is the safest thing to do.

This happened on the last day of school in the Spring of 2007, almost eleven years ago, and I still can remember every bit of it. I know it is probably not healthy to keep memories like that for so long, but I can't help it. It was my first friendship I had in high school and it really hurt when she accused me of annoying me and not giving me a clear explanation of what I had done, and only to find out that she never really liked me to begin with. It was just a pity friendship for several months. And she had waited until the last day of school before summer vacation to tell me, so I felt like she was too afraid to tell me before that and wanted to wait until the last day so she wouldn't have to explain. Anyone have memories like this, whether they happened a week, a month, a year, or even a decade or more ago? Did the experience change you as a person? Are you afraid of it happening again? Just wondered. I am very afraid of it happening again and that's why I don't allow anyone to befriend me out of pity and if I find out someone is doing that, I cut them off immediately.

HI!!!!!
I was an outcast in school and I remember all the slights and insults and pranks as well. I don't think about them all the time, but I can recall them in quite perfect detail effortlessly when I see/hear/feel something that takes me back to those days. I too am very mistrustful, standoffish, and solitary. However, I am not the meek little mouse I was. In fact, I am almost ready for battle every time I see someone walking in my general direction. It hasn't done me a bit of harm and I wouldn't want it any other way. The people who are in my life are the only ones I need.

Same here! I was an outcast too and I don't miss high school at all. I miss college life, but not high school. Yes I had some problems in college, but nothing like it was in high school. I am the same way in terms of remembering things. I don't think about it all the time but when I do, I remember it in such perfect detail. And yes, I am no longer the naive person I used to be. I take the blame for that. That was my fault that I was so trusting back then. That is why I changed. I had to change to prevent myself from being hurt that way again and yes I am always ready for someone to do something to me again. I am more solitary and keep to myself a lot now. This is one of the many instances that caused me to have trust issues with others.

OMG... I'm 69 years old! And I can still remember things that happened to me when I was a teenager... or even, in a few cases, when I was a child. Mostly they were hurtful or embarrassing things. I strive to accept them with compassion & lovingkindness. But it's an on-going process.

Same here.

I was never naive and did not seek friends in school. I was sought out for being picked on. I was different for a lot of reasons. Also, I had a mother who didn't believe that I was going through hell and always told me that if I caused trouble or got into a fight that I had "lost her support". (Support?? Really???LOL!!) Once years ago I saw one in the mall who all of a sudden thought I was good enough to talk to. I told her exactly how I felt and was actually about to throw my drink on her. She got the message and took off, acting "shocked".

Wow your mother doesn't sound like a good parent.

Well....it would take me hours to paint the picture of my parents. They were honest, hard working, both served our country, (as did I), responsible, etc. BUT....when it came to compassion/caring? As little as they could get away with. (Example: I was very sick with a stomach ailment when I was a teenager. All my mother did was yell at me that there was nothing wrong with me and it was all in my head. When I was diagnosed? She rejected the doctor's word because she had never heard of it)Support? You should do for yourself. Problems? You probably asked for it.Friends/boyfriends? They are not good enough for you but you are not good enough for us. School/life/looks/demeanor? Why can't you be like your sister/cousin/niece/or anyone else who is better in a particular area than you....

My DAD was right about everything, and the entire world was wrong about it. Unless they agreed with him. Nothing was ever good enough. He made a sport out of being condescending.

Oh yeah I know a lot of people like that. I hate that.

Wow your parents weren't very supportive of you. That is wrong.

Well....they were "old school', Dad was born in 1914 and mom in 1926. Dad was the only boy in the family. His family elevated him to "godlike" status. Mom was raised by an unfeeling woman who put the boys above her. She was raised with the idea that you have to be a slave to a man. I remember my husband pissing me off once when I was on the phone with her and I told him where to go with it and she literally gasped and said "That's your HUSBAND!!!" I told her that yes, he is my husband, not GOD, which is a distinction YOU have yet to make. It shut her up.

My mind has been replaying all my work mistakes I have ever made.

I am glad you stood up for yourself.

I️ do this all the time. I️ think mine goes a bit deeper. I️ refuse to be associated with my former self. My former self was an unhygienic lazy slob who ate uncontrollably and was gaining huge amount of weight, refused to work and did nothing but read books

Now it’s like I️ have such bad negative memories I’ve changed into a different person or something. I️ take 20 minute showers daily, I️ average 10,00 steps a day, lost most of the weight, eat 1,250 calories a day, work several days a week, and am repulsed at the sight of a book.

I️ don’t know what this change in personality is about, but I️ think it’s going to stick considering I’ve been this way for 2 years.

My former self sickens me. I’m so glad I️ changed.

Btw, I️ often think people befriend me out of pity. There’s this one guy at work who is always nice to me. I’ll often feel like people at work feel sorry for me. No idea why though. I️ meet my 30 boxes an hour quota when they don’t and managers praise me and don’t praise them. So I’m probably just assuming they feel sorry for me. My mom tells me people are not that focused on me.

Yeah it can be hard letting go of past mistakes. Good thing is that they can be learning experiences.

It is good things have changed. I am sickened towards my old self too. And yeah I always worry about people pitying me as well due to that incident back in high school.

I have this powerful memory problem too and continue to be haunted by past failures, remembered childhood traumas and intense bullying. I sometimes even have nightmares about things that cause bad feelings. I've tried time and time again to let go of the past, to forgive my bullies, to put it all behind me but, when I'm down and depressed it all comes flooding back to torment me. These kind of thoughts are self destructive but, when you have a memory that is very vivid and accurate it is hard to let go of things that hurt. Believe me, I know exactly how you feel.

Yeah that is how I feel. Some of them serve as learning experience, such as the one I mentioned in the post. I now know to listen to my gut and not allow people to pity me. But other memories are just simply painful and I can’t forget them. I know exactly how you feel too.