Daily Comments #7- Just place to plant your thoughts. No feedback required.

how am i supposed to take care of others when i cant even take care of myself?

What is one to do when accused falsely? Remember: what ever is going on, is not about you, it's about them. They've got their own crap going on that they aren't dealing with effectively.

Sometimes I wonder why I post on PC.... is it just another way to get stuff out of my mind like when I write in my journal or do I actually like the thought that other people might read this stuff. What I think and feel isn't important to anyone other than me. It's what I do that is important to other people. That is why I have stopped talking.... now I only do and I'm proud of what I have accomplished...

Today is my youngest son's 20th birthday. Good times for him I hope.

RtS...Concerning PC...and your voice/posts. PC is a place to release that voice. Freely and any way you choose. I do dig the journal idea. Hey maybe a blog is a good idea. You can get one here apparently. Always wanted to do that myself but never have. Good way to have that public voice for those times you're not feeling particularly conversational. Thoughts need ears sometimes.

Really looking forward to meeting my new T, Pdoc and starting DBT group on Wed.

Just flowing by, feeling uneasy, I don't know whether or not its just my nerves.

Feeling very closed in and claustrophobic as well. Maybe I will take the computer outside and type there.

So, I went outside with my laptop and immediately came inside because it was windy and I thought a giant tree branch would fall on me. God! I wish I could get a handle on my phobias, but I am back inside feeling less closed in listening to a zen radio station. Maybe the 5 minutes of fresh air is what I needed

I just got home from my mom's. Had cake, pop and a good chat. Found out my older son, in Texas is now engaged. He called just now. Lots of changes.

Hello

For Gtgt: One of my super hot-button things is being falsley accused of anything. It infuriates me faster than just about anything else; and takes a long time for me to get over. I know for certain it is a holdover from childhood, when I had practically no recourse for garbage my sister pulled.

I give you a lot of credit for remaining philosophical about it.

And to add to Q's response to Rts: Posting here and knowing that I'm among people who understand what I face ever day, and how it all can make me feel, is absolutely essential for me now. So few people out there (***waving my hands***) are ever gonna get it, unless a device that can transfer complex emotions and feelings is ever invented! It is all simply too complex and too mystifying and too intransigent a condition for anyone not IN IT to grasp, on more than one or two levels.

I'm also here for the comfort and the understanding acceptance I receive. And, I'm a communicator; I need people. And since I don't have a whole boatload of caring compassionates in real life, I need to connect with folks here. And there are some amazing brave and wonderful people here, I know that for certain.

Those are my reasons for sticking around, anyway. And like my favorite saint said, If there is any good I can do, let me do it and not hesitate. If what I write can help someone else avoid a pitfall, or feel even momentarily better, I can feel good about that.

And it all helps.

Today there's a place for me. It's right here, right now. It doesn't matter what I'm doing. I don't have to do anything at all. I am here. I am alive. For whatever amount of time, this is how it is. Embracing it.

I like that, spondi. Well said.

I just don't know about this.

I hate waking up after sleeping for more than 4 hours I usually wake up feeling stoned, grumpy & nauseated, I thought sleep was suposed to be a restorative?

I wants chocolate- --a really good orange/ dark chocolate bar.

How can a Robot be so sincere?

I just want skype so Mom can talk to her dying brother and they can see each other. Why do they have to make setting it up such an impossible explective nightmare.

So relieved today. I can trust myself. I did trust myself. And...I DO trust myself. I'm starting to feel like I'm getting this, I'm finally getting this. Scary but exciting.

I had a nice day today with family on my brother's birthday. Played with my nieces and nephew, actually interacting with people for once. I feel a little less lonely now. I honestly had fun today.

We need a "what did I do WRONG today" thread...

feeling unsettled and very tired .. not slept well for days and days ..jittery and jaded..anxiety levels v high and im almost bursting with whirling thoughts ..A bit

maybe later ill try a good hard walk and go to the shops and treat myself to some sweets'

Hopefully thatll help reduce the pain level and let me settle

Made a thread

Maybe everything seems bad because it's Monday but I'm so demoralized and I feel like an idiot for being unable to do things on my own. I've been in bed all weekend and woke up today feeling nauseous and anxious. I still wanted to make my pdoc appointment but was worried I wouldnt make it in time so I called the pdoc to ask if it was possible for me to come an hour later. I was told no. Then I find out the pdoc gave away my apointment to someone else. She must have misunderstood me and thought if I wouldnt be allowed to come an hour later I wouldnt want to come at all. I had even arranged for someone to drive me there. So I called my pdoc again, who seemed annoyed that I kept changing my mind, even though I never canceled my appointment. I got my appointment back but I'm not exactly calm about showing up there after all the misunderstanding today. Earlier today I heard my neighbor's cat meowing loudly. He was alone in the yard (the cat usually never goes outside). So I grabbed the cat and brought him to the neighbor who didn't say thanks, but told me to leave her cat alone.. I felt horrible but I guess I understand because a lot of people don't want strangers to touch their pets.
I think I might be overly sensitive today or Mondays just aren't my best days : ) I need to find a way to get tougher and not let things like that affect me this much. I hope everyone has a nice Monday

i'm a failure. just a failure. a terrible big failure. and to be honest i really would like to let go because i'm really tired