any adv for an agender person? [CW: self-harm mention, dysphoria mention]

So I have a really bad sex dysphoria (means I feel like I should be sexless - have no reproductive system / genitals) and also secondary sex characteristics dysphoria. Any advice on how to deal with this? I bought a sports bra because I still haven't "come out" so there is no binder for moi, so yup.

i heard about a surgery for agender people but I'm still a teen so i dont know. plus i've heard it was kinda illegal on many countries which sucks because somedays i really just keep having ideas on how to mutilate my own genitals and its getting really bad. in fact, i feel like i've become numb.

sorry for the explicit thing i just said, but is this really dysphoria? i feel really numb and disconnected from my sex organs and it makes me feel really gross and ashamed to have them. i think im kind of still having hopes that im not transgender but...

Hi agenders,

welcome to pc and our community here! Yes, I think I'd probably call what you describe dysphoria - it's how I feel about certain parts of my body.

Only you can decide whether you identify as transgender or trans* or genderqueer....or... or... The possibilities are endless, I think that's actually a good thing. There is a lot more diversity nowadays, and being trans* doesn't necessarily mean that one has to fully transition to the opposite gender.

Have you found Mikah's blog Neutrois Nonsense? They have a post on nonbinary transition that I quite like: http://neutrois.me/2014/03/06/5-myth...er-transition/.

Nonbinary may not be the way you choose to identify, but it maybe helpful to read about Mikah's experience with the transition process.

Hello Agenders: Have you seen an experienced gender therapist? If you're feeling "really gross and ashamed" & you're having recurring thoughts of self-mutilation, you need to see a professional gender therapist. Therapy is required for transsexual persons who are transitioning & want to have gender reassignment surgery. And also, the kinds of thoughts you're having now, if left to fester, can lead to major depression, generalized anxiety disorder & self-abusive behaviors. So, at this point, my perspective would be that the first thing to be done would be to get going on some therapy. My best wishes to you! (Keep posting here on PC too!)

Thank you so much, really I think being non-binary sucks because honestly there isn't much information on transitioning and such, but I really need surgery... But right now my top priority is getting rid of my chest dysphoria.
I guess I'll have to worry about my sex dysphoria later on, although it's impossible to avoid thinking of it.

I experience the same thing as you since I've now come to the realization that I identify as androgynous. Therapy is definitely the way to go, don't dwell on these things too much, sorry if that's not helpful. <

I'm not agender so I don't know what it's like to want to be sexless. I do however know what it's like to feel disconnected and ashamed of myself. It sucks and I'm sorry you're experiencing this. It could be dysphoria - sure sounds like it - but since you are young and still figuring out who you are, I'd suggest you read this post about things that can mimic dysphoria. If it turns out you are transgender, don't fear it. You will never be alone in your struggles, no matter how it feels right now. Stay strong and whatever you do, please don't hurt yourself!