OCD the most annoying of them all!

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

I am Diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome, ADHD, OCD and OCD is by far the most irriatating one, it can drive me crazy.

I have from what I know OCD for colors, letters, designs, rutines, food, names and patterns.

Everything I buy that matters to me, has to be mostly green coloured, because my eyes are green and because my eyes are green, green is my color. Blue eyed people have blue as their color and so on. Or atleast it has to relate to ME.

I've been trying to put together parts for a computer for about 3 years now, no progress. There is to much thoughts around it for me to be able to make a final purchase. The computer case has to be PERFECT, the components can't be blue, brown or even red, they have to have some green on them, black is alright and so is grey and white. And the commpanies that have made the commponents needs to fit my liking. Sometimes it can even be so bad that commponents from the commpany Corsair I could not pick because the name Corsair relates to sailing in the water, and I don't like water, lakes or oceans, it could also relate to airplanes, and I don't like height, airplanes or flying. And the commpany BitFenix, I can't pick their computer cases because of the name. Fenix is almost Felix, and Felix is the name of a guy who took part of the bullying of me in ground school.

Names, I can't use names online like Dark Angel, Mario, BlazeIT, Dinkleberry and what not. The names have to relate to ME. Caveman wich is my current name here is related to me because my dad started calling me Caveman a while back ago because I mostly sit inside my dark room most of the days afraid of the outside. If it doesn't relate to me I need to atleast have the letters in the name be close to the letters in my real name wich is Oliver. So most of my online names have an "O" in them and the "er".

Patterns go with the design OCD. Everything should be symmetrical in every direction, and stuff should be evenly spaced out and orginized.

When I watch a movie and I miss just he first second of it, I have to rewind and watch it again. Sometimes I keep rewinding multiple times untill I can convince myself that I have seen the VERY beginning of the movie.

I also doubble or even tripple check stuff, like if I sit in my room and I get the feeling that someone is behind my office chair, I have to spin the whole way around, a complete 360 just to make sure that no one is there.

I blame all of my diagnosed for where I am today, because they have effected every single choice I have made in my life.

i sometimes think, would i rather have another disorder than bipolar? i have already ruled out schizophrenia and now after reading the misery you go thru i can certainly say i wouldnt want ocd either, though some of the thinking is familiar to me. i did scored kinda high on the obsessions and compulsion on the sanity test......but thankfully they do not limit my life as yours do. for example my granddaughter was here last night and played with a funky doll that sits in a chair that is never used and now it is just laying there. it isnt how it is SUPPOSED to be so it makes me agitated looking over there and uncomfortable like the living room isnt right, but not so much that i am getting off my lazy *** just to go fix it. it can wait till i go past it next.

i am sorry that you have to live that way. i hope you are able to get a computer together sometime soon.

Thank you!

I think I have bipolar disorder too.
If I was to go and get diagnosed for every disorder and syndrome, I think I would rack up a few more to add to my collection.

Is it even possible to have so many wrongs in the brain.

I have never thought about living without my diagnoses. I've grown attached to them, I've shaped my life around them. Yet they are there, every morning when I wake up, poking me in the face and I still love them. I don't know what it is like to be normal and have a functional life. So I can not know if I would like to be normal or not. It would be soooo cool if for one day, all my diagnoses were none existent.

I just hope that in the far distance future, there will still be support for people like me. Maybe someone will even find something they can use people like me for. I'm not really good or instested in anything, I don't have a dream or a goal. I'm just good at overthinking stuff, and see stuff from other angles, and I always criticize other peoples stuff because I always find flaws in their work, that may or may not be such a big deal for them as they are for me. I could see myself as a movie producer, producing meaningfull movies to spread awareness about us and reminding them about what it means to be human, but also making it a good movie that everyone can see and enjoy, so just subliminal messages. I love to write aswell, as you may have noticed that if I get to write about a subject that intrests me, my fingers just wont stop. But I would need help, a right hand to get to the point where I can make a movie, someone to guide me and tell me how to do and what to do all the way through the process.

yep, of all of them, OCD is my most annoying diagnosis. it's exhausting, stupid, repetitive, intrusive and pointless.