[pauli]

Hi,

my name is Paul and I'm new here...

Last September I gave up cigarettes - I was off them for 6 months then started again after a friend of mine broke up with his partner.

Anyway I'm trying to give up again and getting frustrated with myself that I keep giving in.

I only have one or two a day and whilst I enjoy them when I have them afterwards I'm really down on myself.

There are a couple things I'd also like to give up at the moment - including drinking coke (which I love but I know isn;t good for me).

I'm told it's best to give up one thing at a time - but often when I have a coke it leads to a cigarette which is where my lack of will power comes in.

I have been told in the past that I need to be nicer to myself - not sure how to do that in regards to this.

I guess I'm looking for advice on will power and how to achieve an aim.

Rewards don't work for me - I just give in and reward myself anyway - any advice would be bonza!!!

Thanks.

[pauli]

So avoiding coke in this circumstance is good, yes?

So far so good this morning - I have been tempted to grab a can of coke but have avoided doing so.

Drinking water instead.

[Wants2Fly]

Welcome to the forums! Have you tried nicotine patch or gum?

[Dolfin]

Welcome to the forums Paul. I too am struggling with giving up my vices as well. My new meds recommend limited caffeine intake (there goes my coffee) and as far as my cigarettes....well.....

I have managed to reduce my intake of caffeine, switched to caffeine-free sodas (Orange Slice rocks!) and cut back on the coffee to only 7-8 cups as opposed to my pot and a half I was drinking a month ago.

As far as quitting smoking, this will be my 6th attempt. Cold turkey didn't work for me, so instead, I'm setting a "quit date" - a date to be totally free of that ball-and-chain. I did have a quit date set for earlier this year, but my BP had other plans. So, when I'm ready, I'll pick another quit date, and slowly start to wean myself off of them, hopefully for good this time.

Congrats on the replacing your Coke for water! And good luck!

Dolfin

[GreyGoose]

This is one thing that I can really relate to. I used to smoke two packs of cigs a day, plus cigars and for 20 years I also chewed tobacco and dipped moist snuff. One day I noticed luekoplakic lesions on the insides of my mouth and after a double biopsy which cam back negative (thank God!) I bought myself a package of 4mg nicotine gum and hav'nt looked back since. Nicotine gum has a suprisingly nice "kick" to it and satisfied my cravings. The only thing is, it can be a bit expensive but it is definately MUCH safer. I have chewed it for a few years now (even though your supposed to gradually decrease the amount you chew) but from what I'm told, a lot of people just keep on chewing it. One word of advice though - don't get the nictine lozenges. They taste horrible (like eating chalk or somthing) and don't have near the "kick" as the gum.

[yossarian369]

Hi Paul,

Being nicer to yourself could mean not beating yourself up for failing. It is all in how you look at it. There are many people that would love to be able to only smoke only one or two cigarettes a day. Be proud.

How about congratulating yourself for smaller parts of a goal? If you are trying to give up coke, you could focus on that until you succeed. (When I gave up caffeine, I had terrible headaches. That was my incentive to never go back) You could allow yourself the enjoyment of two cigarettes a day, guilt free, until you have kicked the coke habit, so you don’t feel so deprived of pleasure while giving up coke. Then work on the cigarettes. You could allow yourself 3 cigarettes every 2 days so you can choose which day to smoke only 1. That gives you control, and if you have two on one day you know you will only have one the next. You will learn that you can succeed at having only one cigarette a day on some days. No reason to beat yourself up. Set a time you will reduce it to only 4 cigarettes every three days, so you can try smoking one a day with one “guilt-free failure" every four days. Set a schedule to further reduce the cigarettes, leaving yourself some control using planned “guilt-free failures". By the time you get to one cigarette every two days, you will learn you can go some days without any cigarettes. Keep on your schedule until you are eventually having none. They may seem like baby steps, but you are teaching yourself control, and you can be proud of each step. Every success makes the next success easier because you get used to succeeding and don't automatically expect failure from your efforts.

I would also suggest skipping the nicotine replacement. At the low rate you are already smoking, I think it is more a psychological than physical addiction. Nicotine in any form is addictive, and you will eventually have to give up the replacement, which may be more difficult than giving up the cigarettes.

Good luck to you. I hope this helps.

[GreyGoose]

The nicotine replacement gum was a major help in allowing me to quit smoking and I have been smoke-free for two years because of it. While it is just as addictive (and expensive) it is also much safer. You don't have to use it Paul (that is up to you) but it is at least one very viable option that is available to you should you decide to avail yourself of it. I wish you the best of luck. Please keep us informed:-)

[pauli]

Wow - thanks everyone for your advice and support.

At this stage I don't feel I need gum or patches as I don't really crave it all that much.

Yesterday I felt really good without any caffine or tobacco but today I have a terrible headache.

Funnily enough I went home sick from work on Friday due to a nasty headache, again, I'd gone without ciagerettes and caffine on the Thursday.

My Dr did suggest I come off the Coke slowly but I suspect I'm just looking for an excuse to have one now.
Still on the water at this stage - craving a coke but not the cigarette...but once I have the coke...?????

What to do...

[(JD)]

Ouch! Yes, because they are drugs, withdrawal is common place. A few sips of caffeine will take the headache away generally... and each day fewer sips will be needed. No reason to suffer those headaches! Feel better!

[pauli]

The thing is, when I do have a coke, I feel guilty - but that's another issue altogether I guess, isn't it?

[pauli]

Sorry to keep harping on this...on Monday I went without coke and thus I went without a cigarette, then Tuesday I gave in, had a coke which led to a cigarette. The same occured today - when I have the first half of the cigarette I enjoy it, then by the end it just tastes awful.

One seems to lead to the other.

I know I don't have real problem with this - I just hate the feeling afterwards of feeling guilty plus the icky tatse in my mouth.

Should I set targets or take it a day at a time?

When I went without the other day I felt terrific and when I went for my daily swim I did the equal quickest time I've done in my near 3 years of swimming.

I guess the issue is how do I avoid the first can of coke?

I've avoided having a cigarette at work and that's good - I know I shouldn't be hard on myself I just feel weak for not being able to give up this habit.

Thanks for listening / reading...

[vacantangel]

Hi Paul, welcome to the forums. I've never been a smoker so I can't help you with that one. I used to drink a LOT of Diet Pepsi and had weaned myself off it years ago but I've since gone back to having the odd one here and there.

Maybe you could remind yourself how good you feel on the days that you don't drink the Coke and have a cigarette. Maybe that might help?

I do think you need to be kinder to yourself. We all slip up now and again. Not one of us is perfect and you shouldn't expect that you might be.

As far as setting a target quit date or taking it one day at a time, since I've never smoked, again, I'm not too good for giving advice, but my suggestion would be to take it one day at a time. If you set a target date and you don't meet it, are you going to beat yourself up even more? Anyway, much luck and kudos for your desire and effort and give yourself a pat on the back for that!!!

((((((((((( Paul )))))))))))

[TgrsPurr]

Hi Pauli, well since the coke is the stimulant for a cigarette, the coke is the real issue. Don't keep any in the house and when you get a hankering reach for the water which will flush the nicotine and need for caffeine out of your system quicker, making it easier to resist.
Hope this help. TgrsPurr.

P.S. Remember, it always comes down to a choice, choose not to give in.