Back, exhausted

I am back after husband's surgery. I am exhausted and really can't even catch up. I posted an update in SI. Check it out, p.m. me if you want to catch me up. I just can't read through all that I have missed. Hope everyone is well.

Glad you're back. Hope you're well.

Ry

Good to see you back ((((((((((Wise & Hubby)))))))))

Thanks Ryan and Karen. i am okay. I have to get off line and make some decisions about hub's meds as he is in pain and not due for more stuff yet. Thanks for the kindness.

Welcome back wisewoman. Hope hubby's surgery went well. Good to see you back.

So glad you are back wisewoman. I love stealing bits of your wisdom here and there Missed you quite a bit. Hope hubby feels better and the pain meds hold off the worst of the pain.

Just called the hospital nurse on the floor and she told me what to do. He is resting well. He has railings on his bed and I hope I wake to his trying to get up to pee etc. as that is bad for him to walk alone. Now, the real kick in the pants is that"MY" two little older dogs are in his hospital bed with him. Traitors, haven't seen them for days and they are loyal to him? I think they feel his pain and need. Puppy is on my bed but he has been known to piddle so.... Oh Shay, nice to hear from you. My heart is so full it's hard to focus. Also sleep deprivation helps. Hope you are well my friend.

((((((((((((((((((((WW)))))))))))))))))

Welcome back.

I had a large update that was dumped I believe. Tomorrow I go back to work. Hubby is getting around well and staples come out tomorrow afternoon. I will pour his meds out for him. He took a shower today and we went for a walk with the dogs. It is freezing here. He is resting now. I don't look foreward to the work thing. I question if some of what they are doing and saying to me is legal and or abusive. For example they told me that my evaluation was confidential and that I may not discuss with anyone? It's about me. That came from my being friends with a board member and sharing my pain with her over something that was said to me a month or so back. I also have written accusations against me that are not true and I am trying to stay in the present with it as it is reminisent of childhood abuse. I was tortured because I was bad, did bad etc. So I am mixed about the work thing, worried about money. Hubby has no income at all. I will try to just do my job and take care of my body and soul while I do it. Swim? Eat well, walk, drink water. My youngest spent the weekend retreating in the woods with friends and that was great for all of us. I am anxious about returning to work, leaving hubby, money. Where did my gratitude for his being okay go? Can't make me happy no matter how hard we try. The walk was fun because the dogs, all 5 of them were so funny. They hadn't been in a while so in the van on the way to the old road they were talking and baby started howling. They were so excited and had a blast. I love watching them. They have lots of space here to run but it is the routine of a new adventure4 they like. I gave up many animals trying to simplify things and I am thinking my goats are next. I also am going to discuss with the girls giving up sattelite t.v. Saves money and no one ever watches. Rambling, I know. Magic words of comfort please.

Summoning the magic......om.......ok, don't know if I have any magical words of comfort, but I do want to say that in all your infinite wisdom you have been such a help to so many here, that now is your time draw strength. You have been through so much! I don't understand why some people are given so many challenges. I think with the strength of your family that you'll get through it. I know hubby must be so eternally greatful to you! It is so understandable to have some resentment towards the whole situation. I don't think it's lack of caring at all. You don't have resentment toward him and it's definetly not that you're not greatful he's ok. But the situation is so stressful that it feels as though you're resenting him. I had the same battle with my conscience when my mom was sick. I was so resentful of the cancer and just the plain unfairness of it all, that I thought I was resenting her, but I wasn't at all! You're still taking pleasure in the simple things, watching the dogs run around and play, and enjoying hearing about your daughter's retreat, so you're still in there somewhere, happy and healthy! The girls will understand about the satellite tv, it really is overkill on cable eh? The goats will be ok if you have to give them up. I understand having to give up the things you love though. It's so hard. But the outcome will be well worth it when you're back on your feet.

This too shall pass. I know it's hard to believe, since it seems like when one hardship is overcome, you get thrown another one. Just remember that you've made it through the other things, and maybe after this, you'll get a rest.

My thoughts and prayers are with you wise and hubby. I hope a little fairness is thrown your way and you get some time to relax. Swim, eat well, walk, drink water, and let yourself have some chocolate for heavens sake! You deserve it!!!!

((((( wisewoman )))))

No magic here sorry but there is a whole lot of caring and support. It sounds like hubby is getting healthier (thank you higher powers). It also sounds like you can pick out some good times in all the bad. I hope you can continue to do this.

As for the confidential thing....since when is anything that happens confidential to board members??? hmmmm....I would question that too. Sounds like somebody is playing C.M.A. = cover my *****

I am sorry about the animals. Maybe if you get rid of the cable you can have more time with the dogs.

Just trying to focus on positives. I know that was a stretch.

Good luck and take care.

place

Hey Place and Ray,l gonna take out a few staples from hubby's neck. Thanks for the love and encouragement.

and I feel like self injuring big time. Weird be this life.

Sorry sweetie, no magic here either. If there was, I would gladly send it your way. You've been through a lot. Please don't forget to take very good care of you. Good luck with going back to work tomorrow and try not to worry about it. I know, easier said than done. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Sending good vibes your way. Take care and keep us posted.

(((((((((((( wisewoman )))))))))))

((((WW))))

I'm so sorry your life is so awfully difficult now. Wishing I could make it betterer!!

emmy

((((((((wisewoman)))))))),

I know how exhausting the hospital thing can be. Was there last year with my Mother, & ended up there myself because there was no time to take care of myself.

You have so much on your plate right now, & stressing about the work situation doesn't help. It is good that you know the things you need to help yourself like swimming, walking, & of course your animals (they really are the best aren't they). Money issues are also at the top end of the stress list.

Sorry no magic words, only words of care & hoping that it all works out. The great part is that your husband is now up & walking so hopefully everything else will start looking up too.

Take it all one step at a time & the path will help you make the correct decisions needed to take the next step.

Thinking of you,
Debbie

Thanks Em, Eskie and vacant angel, It is morning and I am off to get dressed and be off. Just gave hubby his pills. I have only been in jeans for two weeks so it's kinda weird thinking I have to go up and find my grown up clothes. Grown up. POO!

(((((((((((((((((((((((wisewoman))))))))))))))))))))))))))

update, staples came out of hubby today. He overdid tonight and I did as well. His pain is bad and he needs to be careful. Thanks bear.