Party & Police

Ok, I went to this rock bands thing at a school. Met a guy who is one year older than me. Went with my friend and we decide to camp outside in a forest at midnight with some guys. They were drinking and doing drugs. But the guy I was with took care of ME. He was going to let me share his sleeping bad with me. Also we were holding hands and kissing. He lifted me up over the fence. Then when it was totally dark started talking I put my hand on his leg, while my friend who is a girl was playing truth ir dare. Dare to snog this other guy. Anyway my parents got worried sick as my phone didn't work. So my mum called the police, when it was way past my bed time. Of corse school workers found me and my friend. Said goodbye to the guys. I should have felt guilty and actually be sorry. But it was the best teenage stupid thind I've done in my life and I don't regret. So I'm now baned for the internet for a week. But sneaked on somehow. The police didn't interew me like they said as they were too busy. Lol, I'm not laughing that of all people I thought my mum would understand that it was only a bit of fun. I did hug my mum and said sorry, I hope that she would just leave me alone. Hmm.... What a night!

It's hard for mothers to keep their kids safe. Sometimes just a phone call to let them know you are alive helps. Perhaps next time, using someone else's phone if yours is broken will allow your mother some peace of mind. As far as the incident. No comment.

That was really quite illegal, dangerous, and stupid.

I don't care if it's not supportive, sometimes the truth needs to be said. The mods can delete this if they like.

Just a question....was that "share his sleeping BAD with me" a typo or was it a freudian slip???lol

Really, I remember doing something like that when I was young & mind you, that was 36 years ago. It isn't ok now anymore than being ok then.....speaking as a mother myself. The problem is that things can "just" happen that are out of your control no matter how much you think someone is taking care of you. This can be related to drugs or any other harmful situation in life.

We didn't have cell phones in my day, so we were expected to call from any phone that was available (& there had to be one available) if we ever got into a situation that wasn't acceptable & absolutely no excuses were accepted. I didn't call either. My parents thought I was at a safe high school party with my friend whos father was a minister, but in reality, several of us were out crusing in one of the guys car. The breaks went out in the car.....running through several red lights & coming close to ending up in a crash.....at that point, I saw my life flashing in front of my face along with the picture of the police going to my parents home telling them what might have happened if we really had crashed. My parents had no idea of any of this & of course, their little girl would never get involved in any situation like that. I am glad they never did find out...I would have been grounded for life if they had. But over time, I started feeling really sick inside by keeping what had happened inside. I never did tell them, but finally I had to talk to someone about it before being able to let go of the sick feeling. I knew it was wrong even if I didn't say anything & it taught me to think about the situation I was in before letting it get out of control. Maturity isn't necessarily how you handle getting caught, but how you handle keeping a similar situation from hurting you in your future life. Doing something wrong that could hurt you isn't a great way to get attention. There are other much more positive ways to get attention.

I know this comes from one of the older members of the forum, &

miss a,

honey, you're not going to get a supportive "way to go" response from me either. yet, it still is supportive...

that could have been disasterous...really. not a good choice, i don't think. leave the woods at nite with strangers to the animals that dwell there. you're not of that breed.

be safe, and i would've grounded you alot harsher

kd

I have to say I am with the others on this one. doing drugs and booze in the woods is no place for a young girl. with the drugs that are out there today you really NEVER know what you are getting. you could die. we love you here and do not want anything to happen to you. you always need to call your mom and dad and let them know you are ok. I am a mom and when people in my house are not home on time I worry big time. it isn't that we are trying to control our children, we just love them and need to keep them safe from ALL harm.

John, I totally agree. Then in a day or 2 we'll hear how depressed or lost this person is.
People, young or old, realize, you do stupid,careless,dangerous, and immature things, you then will have some sort of consequences to pay. We can't go around blaming others either for our actions.
Sometimes we all make unwise choices, but repeating them over and over is downright stupid. What kind of support can one offer for this foolish, selfish behaviour?
Good post, John.

DE

(((((((((((( John ))))))))))))))

I am glad you are home safe.
lrks

LOL, I have to laugh and shake my head, "kids will be kids". It's your age to do things like that. Still, the mom in me thinks that you have a very loving, caring mom who did the right thing in calling the police. I would have been worried sick if you were my child and didn't come home, had no contact with,etc!!! Love and laugh at what you did, but do feel guilty. You can't imagine now what your mom was going through. Also, be careful with your friends. I do NOT like the sound of what happened there! You need to make some firm, positive changes in how you relate to people; I am very worried that you might really get in to trouble. I hope you understand that I care about you even though we have never met in real life. I have come across too many people in my life who have impacted me very negatively. I have PTSD--I am very cautious of the behaviors of your friends and with how far you went with them. You sound like you are a typical fun-loving and risk-taking teenager. Just do it safe and set limits for yourself and others. Talk to your T about what happened.

It sounds like you had a good time...but you scared the bejesus out of your parents. Why not just call? When I had a curfew or was going somewhere, sometimes I'd just call even if they didn't ask. It helped my parents gain trust in me and let me go places that I might not normally have been able to go had they not had that built up trust.

And be careful who you're hanging out with...

I'm sure you've heard it all before so that's all I'm gonna say. Just jot it down as another stupid teenager thing but learn from your experience. It's the best advice I could give you.

Miss A, I was a very rebellious and risk taking teenager myself. I remember doing things like you did so I understand the fun you were having. I'm sure you were really enjoying yourself. Sometimes I look back at some of the things I did and wonder how I came out unhurt.

One time, and only once, I allowed a friend of mine to set me up with a blind date. He picked me up and took me out to a park in the wilderness. He didn't waste any time trying to get what he wanted. Somehow, and I don't know how, I was able to get him off me without it going too far. I kept yelling "No," hitting him and finally dug my fingernails into his ears to hurt him and pull him off. Guess that finally convinced him because of the pain and the blood. He got really angry with me but he drove me back to town. He could have easily ignored my refusal and raped me and left me out there, either dead or alive.

Come to find out, this so-called "friend" had told him that I was an easy mark. So you see? You have to be more careful about who you call "friend" and whom you trust. This boy could have "been taking care" of you for ulterior motives.

Just this year I had a man from my mobile home park come on to me by "taking care of me." Hubby and I had a fight and hubby left for a few days, which is usual for him. This man, who is a murder and a con man thought he saw his opportunity and was trying to convince me that he was going to marry me!! Excuse me!?!? I'm already married!

I really, really enjoyed how "he took care of me," the way he made me laugh and the way you could tell where he was in the park by his singing. But at the time, he was living with a woman across the street from me. He had shared intimacies about their relationship with me. Just that alone was enough for me to KNOW I didn't need to get involved with this man. I WANTED to, mind you! He reminded me of how my mom used to take care of the grandmother. I'm starved for that kind of "caring." But I knew it wasn't in my best interest in the long run. It wasn't an easy choice, but it was one I had to make in MY BEST INTEREST... for the long run.

It's a good thing to "live in the moment," but you still have to exercise some self-discipline so you can make wise choices for yourself.

Please take better care of yourself. Use this experience to learn from and consider yourself lucky that nothing happened.

you'd be off the internet for a month and in the house for the same time. what you did was very dangerous and could have turned into something disastrous........such as being raped, killed or abused. i'm with JohnShaft. this may not be supportive, but sometimes i'm amazed at you.

Eventhough I had been tortured beyond description at your age I thought it was just my family. I left myself open to things like your story and I am so luck nothing bad came of it. I am sorry that you made choices that put you at risk and you are old enough to know what we all are speaking of. You need to respect yourself more and consider your safety. As for sharing a sleeping bag---um, that has always meant one thing in my experience. I ran away once at 15. For good reason, I had the crap knocked out of me daily. However, I landed in a situation where the man wanted in my um...breeches, and the girlfriend protected me and kept herself between us. I was very luck indeed. Until my brother found me and tok me "home" He was on his motercycle and I made him take the long way home. He cared then, now he has schitzophrenia.

I'm 26. I'm older then you and an "adult" but maybe my age relative to you will help, since that was me when I was your age. Times like those were fun and cool, and I just knew everyone thought I was soooo cool to be boozing and drugging with older guys, especially if I "scored" with a hot one. Well, those people are long gone, so does it really matter how cool they thought I was? And those guys I "scored" with just got to add me to their list. They loved "taking care of me" when I was wasted, and boy did I "take care of them" only to be known as a slut later on, and getting raped in the process. As for eskie pointing out the freudian slip of the "sleeping bad" thing, take that to heart. Look at what you write, because honesty comes out when we write. One of my "mentors" shall we call her, pointed out a slip I made in some of my writing, which pointed out how I really felt about the issue. You knew it was bad, and it would have gotten worse had your mother not called the cops. I don't think you came here to brag about your party. I think you posted this so we'd all tell you what you know deep down - that you're a good kid and you have potential for a great life. Don't let some drunken nights kill your future. I almost did. And now I'm repairing the damage of all those "cool" nights. The fact that you hugged your mom and said you're sorry shows you still have some heart. Don't break hers. Learn from this experience and know how to respect your boundries in the future by saying NO. It doesn't make you uncool. It saves your life. Don't wait until you're 26 to start making the right decisions. It gets much harder when you're my age to repair the damage.

Love you kid, stay true to yourself and trust your gut.

~Rayna

I used to be that guy, hell i know of several chicks back then that got in trouble for hanging out past or being where they wernt suppose to be.

However i say not all of us males were sex freaks and what have you, back then sure i had ranging hormones but having a good time wasnt always trouble for me. Sure i smoked weed sometimes and smoked ciggs i wasnt a trouble maker. When i told a girl i cared for her it was in honesty.

Sometimes i would meet a girl at a keg party and we would kling together all night, she would be a year or so younger and you could tell this was one of her first times or she didnt know anyone. I would take her off and we would hang outside the party to be alone.

While everyone thinks we were up to no good, we would be just talking and things. I ALWAYS hated it when people said ohh you did her or your up to no good and what have you. While the crowd i hung out with wasnt exactly bad .. they didnt have respect for me.

I think this is the biggest issue i had back then people didnt respect me, perents and kids alike always thought when i was doing something i was doing something bad. Man i used to get so angry about that. Just cause im talking to this girl outside the party alone doesnt mean im up to no good or down her pants.

Im now 32 and some of the girls i talked to back then im still really good friends with, im not saying all males are bad but im not saying all males are good. I just wish sometimes there was a little more respect so that maybe people could trust a little more. You can be alone and do together without being "naughty" .. however if i make it to when my 13yr old stepdaughter is a teen will i still believe that LOL

Thank you all for your honest posts. Oh my gosh, amdx64, you sound just like that guy at the party. He was so nice to me even hold hands and lift me up etc... Yet I just don't understand why he didn't notice me at school only at a stupid rock party. Maybe I never knew him, but once you get to know him. He's a really nice, funny, cute guy and easy to talk too! I'm still at the age where I'll almost do anything just to get a boy to like me back too. If that sounds wrong. You deserve to be mad with me, if you are. But these guys are from our school and there not too dangerous. I'm going to shut up now and think what I did. Yes it's not funny and I'm not laughing. But there was just someone who took cared of me and made me feel special that night for once... Is that too much to ask for? (I would never force myself into sex, unless I'm 101% sure!)

miss a hon alot of girls that get taken advantage of are by boys they know....they use drugs to do it. even if you don't want to the drugs will make you want to. just be careful honey.

Miss A, Don't always trust "friends." When I was in the military, I was gang raped by about 15 "friends" people that I worked with and hung out with routinely. My best "friend" held me down while the rest had their way with their body parts and beer bottles and who knows what else.

My roommate later told me that she knew about their plan and that they put something in my drink when I went to the bathroom.

Nice friends, huh?

Plus, Miss A, there is another thing, "date rape", yes it happens. I hope you do not become a victim.
Take care,
DE

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(I would never force myself into sex, unless I'm 101% sure!)

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If you were "101% sure" why would you have to force yourself?

Another thing, those girls who will "do anything just to get a boy to like me" usually end up being thought of as easy, and that's when they get taken advantage of.

Thank you God that things were stopped early!!!!!
Lrks