[Greenleaves]

Everyone kept telling me to get some help and I kept putting it off, but then I realized that I really wanted to do well in school and that maybe I need some help to ensure that.

Well, I was still putting it off, until I got blocked at another site. I got really really upset (yet again), and people told me to get some help.

Today I went to an "assessment" session at the student counselling centre.

I was in a good mood and didn't think much of it. I was starting to think that maybe it was a little silly.

I think I disclosed things too readily or something because I think she really freaked out. It didn't seem like she was freaking out, but then she pretty much insisted that I go with her to see a GP immediately!

Yikes.

That was embarrassing. I got seen really quickly too...like it was some sort of emergency or something! EEEK...so embarrassing.

Well, now I'm going to see my p-doc's replacement (my p-doc is on maternity leave) in two weeks.

It turns out that the student counselling centre will NOT see me. :-(

Why in the world do others think I'm so disordered? Do I just not have enough insight or something? Maybe it was the way I so casually discussed plans of killing myself. :-(

I guess I'm just too disordered for the student counselling centre? :-(

Thank goodness the GP there decided NOT to send me to the hospital!

That's just what I need! Another stupid trip to the hospital...possibly getting locked up again and missing my classes.

[January]

Hi Green,

Look at the good points. She listened. You are getting help soon. You were not put in the hospital and you're not going to miss classes. It sounds like the best possible scenario.

Cheers!

Jan

[misty]

sounds you may be in need of more than student counsil. That is ok ya know. It is good when ppl can see the help we need and let us know instead of pretending they can help and keep us on for their selfish needs. And maybe I'm just out there. just my 2 cents.

[Greenleaves]

Interesting take on things...

Maybe it's not that bad...well, except for the embarrassment.

The counsellor there told me that I need long term therapy and that is why the student counselling centre is not right for me. I think they will find someone for me or something. The counsellor there was nice, she went with me to see the doctor and she even talked for me. I was scared and didn't know what to do.

She was nice, but she had too big a deal of things. Maybe she wanted to be on the safe side. It's weird...I need this type of help when I'm in crisis and now I get this type of help and I'm not even in crisis.

I must be doing something wrong!

[wi_fighter]

I'm betting she erred on the side of safety. Like when I went in for my well woman exam that was given through our state's well woman program, I technically didn't qualify for a mammogram, but because of my depression they let me get one to ease my mind and not have that for me to worry about.

Getting this help now, even though you could have used it in the past, might prevent you from having a crisis in the future.

[Greenleaves]

I'm kind of afraid to go see this new p-doc now. I'm afraid of unfamilar things. I don't know what to say. The counseling centre is going to call me back with probably a referral to see a psychologist or something...I'm afraid of that too. Just thinking about this makes me nervous.

(Whining) I don't wanna go! What have I gotten myself into? Too much too soon!

you need to go. you know that i know that. it won't be as uncomfortable as you're building it up to be. these people are trained in talking to "us". they will make you comfortable and when you're ready, you'll talk to them. okay?

[gardenergirl]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
greenleaves123 said:

She was nice, but she had too big a deal of things. Maybe she wanted to be on the safe side. It's weird...I need this type of help when I'm in crisis and now I get this type of help and I'm not even in crisis.

I must be doing something wrong!

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Actually, in a lot of cases, they say "strike while the iron is cold". Meaning that the work of therapy is often best done when you are NOT in crisis. And then having established a relationship with a therapist, you have someone to turn to when you ARE in crisis.

I'm proud of you for going.

gg

Oh Deneb, thats really great :-)
Really.
:-)
I'm so proud of you for going. You are absolutely right - you really want to get through school and you have made a really positive move towards helping yourself achieve your goal

YAY!!!!

And I think... That other people are spot on: Thats about the best outcome there is.

My university councelling service is the same. They typically see students for 2 or 3 sessions to deal with short term problem focused stuff. They are NOT equipped to deal with mental health issues. They are NOT equipped to be able to provide ongoing psychotherapy. Some universities have different councelling services that offer different treatments, but yours sounds a lot like mine.

I'm seeing a councellor from university councelling services at the moment. because i have been having trouble getting someone from community mental health... but it is really hard. because she finds it hard to know what to do with me. because she is not used to giving someone psychotherapy. we make the best we can of the situation we have found ourselves in but... it sounds to me like you are actually going to get some help :-)

and that really is terrific.
don't get me wrong it will be hard work
but you are much more likely to get through school if you can start to make some sense of your moods
and if you can start to learn how to control them a little
and your behaviour when they strike you.

I think...
its really understandable to feel nervous.
i'm always really nervous when i meet a new clinician.
i really hope they turn out to be a good fit with you and you get along well :-)

>It's weird...I need this type of help when I'm in crisis and now I get this type of help and I'm not even in crisis.

it is hard to know what to do to help someone when they are in crisis... other people can't do anything to make your bad feelings stop :-(
and probably all they can do... is to help keep you safe by putting you in hospital or something...
but when you aren't in crisis
you can make real headway on stuff
so the next crisis is easier to cope with
and so it is not so much of a crisis.

:-)

[Greenleaves]

Thanks everyone for supporting me in this...I think I'm gonna need it.

I'm getting quite nervous just thinking about it. I just hope I'm not going to hide under the table or anything when I go see the replacement p-doc two weeks from now. Believe it or not, it is something that can happen to me...the hiding thing.

I dunno, I think I act like a scared little kid sometimes...or an angry kid having a temper tantrum.

It's dangerous to have tantrums now, because people don't see me as a little kid and the escalation gets pretty severe.

Maybe I should distract myself for a while instead of worrying about the appointments.

Today was the first day of class. I will start studying tomorrow. I think I may post some new pics up onto my webpage (can't call it a site yet since it's just one page!)

Thanks again people!

[DocClyde]

Green,

Hope things work out well. I know from experience that building things up to be bigger than they are has always been a part of my vocabulary, and it helps put me into a defeatist attitude.

If you do feel suicidal sometimes, maybe the long-term therapy will be good for you for a while? Long-term does not always mean life-long, either.

I hope you enjoy your classes, I am just starting new ones myself, and already feel way behind