[CrazyChick80]

Just this past month I stayed for 2 weeks in the Mental Health Unit of our local hospital. I live in a very rural area. I know most places are not, how shall I put it, peaches and cream, but I feel I was more traumatized than helped during my stay. Has anyone else ever felt like this? We had daily group 'therapy' that ranged from very well managed to "Let's just listen to some country music on tv." It took me almost a week to even get adjusted to being in there, then the next week was spent in fear of being sent home before I was ready (my problem, not their fault). I only got to go outside one time for 15 minutes during the entire stay. They would bribe us with outside time to get us to go to group and such, but they were always conviently busy or understaffed when it was actually a time we could go outside. (And of course I understand all the problems that could arise: runaways, etc. They seem to have a high standard of who gets to go outside or not, etc.) No one else got to go out either, and I KNOW a few of us were qualified to get to go, I saw it on one of the counselors charts. Anyway, getting sidetracked. Now that I am home, I have been having self distructing behavior to my few friendships, desiring to even be back in the hospital, a different one, where I can do an actual program, like a detox or something in comparison, that has intense therapy. Does such a place exist? I plan on talking about it at my next therapy session, but I have some other health issues that are keeping me from therapy for at least 2 weeks. Any ideas, comments? I know this has been all over the place, sorry. Very nervous and scatterbrained this evening.

[kikki27]

Originally Posted by CrazyChick80

Just this past month I stayed for 2 weeks in the Mental Health Unit of our local hospital. I live in a very rural area. I know most places are not, how shall I put it, peaches and cream, but I feel I was more traumatized than helped during my stay. Has anyone else ever felt like this? We had daily group 'therapy' that ranged from very well managed to "Let's just listen to some country music on tv." It took me almost a week to even get adjusted to being in there, then the next week was spent in fear of being sent home before I was ready (my problem, not their fault). I only got to go outside one time for 15 minutes during the entire stay. They would bribe us with outside time to get us to go to group and such, but they were always conviently busy or understaffed when it was actually a time we could go outside. (And of course I understand all the problems that could arise: runaways, etc. They seem to have a high standard of who gets to go outside or not, etc.) No one else got to go out either, and I KNOW a few of us were qualified to get to go, I saw it on one of the counselors charts. Anyway, getting sidetracked. Now that I am home, I have been having self distructing behavior to my few friendships, desiring to even be back in the hospital, a different one, where I can do an actual program, like a detox or something in comparison, that has intense therapy. Does such a place exist? I plan on talking about it at my next therapy session, but I have some other health issues that are keeping me from therapy for at least 2 weeks. Any ideas, comments? I know this has been all over the place, sorry. Very nervous and scatterbrained this evening.

Hey Iam glad that you got help so you would not harm your self and yes It does take a little bit of time of adjusting back In the real world Instead of being In the hospital.If you dont matter me asking you this what are you being treated for?I am being treated for social anxiety and adhd and ocd with the bad thoughts and ritals and panic attacks .I would do group therapy that helps me get through my rough times and venting here is also helpfull and writting In a journal.Iam very proud of you for seeking treatment cause a lot of people would have their pride and say no way I dont need treatment .Huggs

[CrazyChick80]

Thanks for the support, kikki. Although I have to admit, as bad as I was mentally at the time of my voluntary admission at the hospital, it had nothing to do with pride at that point. I was desperate. My therapist gave me a few options, and I did choose the hospital (before they would have chosen it for me, no doubt!) it was AFTER that I dealt / am dealing with the pride thing. Now that the desperation issue is over, I have found it a little hard to say "So what?" to any negative thoughts I may have about being in the mental health unit.

I also suffer from OCD. Severe Depression, General Anxiety Disorder, PD-NOS, PTSD and Co-dependancy issues. I can be pretty much all over the place at times. Right now I also have just been diagnosed with Level 4 Endometriosis and had some polyps removed from my uterus ( I didn't even know you could have them there.) and have had 2 lumps discovered, all from one yearly pap appointment. That has thrown a twist in my recovery for the moment. I have already had a D & C and hysterescopy laparoscopy preformed last monday, so getting that ball rolling now. The big kicker is I am getting ready to start a 3 month deal that temporarily throws you into menopause so the estragen is cut off and the rest of the endometriosis that is left on my bowels, etc, will die out and not (hopefully) end up in some bowel removal or a hysterectomy at this time. The biggest side effects are of course none other than extreme mental distress (that and hot flashes) and it can get so bad they have to give you a huge dose of estrogen to make the mental stuff 'go away' which totally defeats the purpose of the whole shot thing to begin with. My doctor has discussed the pros and cons of all this with me, and since SOMETHING has to be done SOON, I perhaps will very well get a menopause inducing shot at 1:45 tomorrow. (I am still praying about it and will not make up my mind until I get some further questions answered that I have thought of since my last visit.)

Can you tell I am one big sidetracked nervous wreck right now? Has this post even made sense? lol This is all happening kind of fast, and little ocd me likes a game plan, like a year in advance. Well, didn't get that this time, and that has to be okay, and I will have to go from here!

[Princess_Obsidian]

Greetings,

Just be thankful you were released as soon as you were. Some of us have had quite the lengthy stay/s/ Nonetheless, the most important part out of all of this is that you are now out breathing the free air, which, btw, I hope you do not take advantage of.

Best of luck to you!

Have a good one.

[ruffy]

(((CrazyChick80))) Just wanted to tell you how brave you were to admit yourself to the hospital. I just did the same thing approx. 2 weeks ago. Other than being monitored for safety there was not much of a program at the hospital I stayed in. It was my first time, and I slept most of the time. I too was terrified they would release me too soon. As far as going outside, you had to be a smoker to do that. I agree with you, I wish there were facilities with programs for people like us were we could stay, be kept safe, receive our meds and therapy, individual and group.

[Leed]

Hi "Chick" ~ Just wanted to say that I've been in one of those facilities and i wanted to go back too. I felt safe there.

You mentioned a place that had intensive therapy, like detox. Do you NEED detox??? Yes, there ARE such places, but I was just wondering if addiction or alcoholism was one of your problems. Because there are programs that are 30 & 90 days, and you can be inpatient, at least in my neck of the woods.

I've often wanted to go back to what I called the "nut house" because I felt a sense of peace there. I was in MANY years ago - in the 70's. But I'll never forget the feeling of serenity I had there. I doubt I'll ever feel that again, but it was great at the time.

I wish you the very best ~ my prayers are with you. God bless and take care. Hugs, Lee

Hello. I have no words. You all are in my thoughts.

[kikki27]

Originally Posted by CrazyChick80

Thanks for the support, kikki. Although I have to admit, as bad as I was mentally at the time of my voluntary admission at the hospital, it had nothing to do with pride at that point. I was desperate. My therapist gave me a few options, and I did choose the hospital (before they would have chosen it for me, no doubt!) it was AFTER that I dealt / am dealing with the pride thing. Now that the desperation issue is over, I have found it a little hard to say "So what?" to any negative thoughts I may have about being in the mental health unit.

I also suffer from OCD. Severe Depression, General Anxiety Disorder, PD-NOS, PTSD and Co-dependancy issues. I can be pretty much all over the place at times. Right now I also have just been diagnosed with Level 4 Endometriosis and had some polyps removed from my uterus ( I didn't even know you could have them there.) and have had 2 lumps discovered, all from one yearly pap appointment. That has thrown a twist in my recovery for the moment. I have already had a D & C and hysterescopy laparoscopy preformed last monday, so getting that ball rolling now. The big kicker is I am getting ready to start a 3 month deal that temporarily throws you into menopause so the estragen is cut off and the rest of the endometriosis that is left on my bowels, etc, will die out and not (hopefully) end up in some bowel removal or a hysterectomy at this time. The biggest side effects are of course none other than extreme mental distress (that and hot flashes) and it can get so bad they have to give you a huge dose of estrogen to make the mental stuff 'go away' which totally defeats the purpose of the whole shot thing to begin with. My doctor has discussed the pros and cons of all this with me, and since SOMETHING has to be done SOON, I perhaps will very well get a menopause inducing shot at 1:45 tomorrow. (I am still praying about it and will not make up my mind until I get some further questions answered that I have thought of since my last visit.)

Can you tell I am one big sidetracked nervous wreck right now? Has this post even made sense? lol This is all happening kind of fast, and little ocd me likes a game plan, like a year in advance. Well, didn't get that this time, and that has to be okay, and I will have to go from here!

Wow girl you are brave and a strong woman cause I cant take fibromyalia or kidney stones.The ocd thing sucks you have to wash your hands a lot and do these crazy stuff.Like I freak out if someone have a cold cause I panic about getting the cold .Iam going to be praying for you cause my mom went through the hot flashes with her surgey and she really bad mood swings and she was wearing the hormone patch and she got scared of taking the patch cause she read the side effects from the patch so her doctor put her on paxil cr.Yeah it make sense.I go through the same thing like I can end up getting an sinus infection and on the other hand somrthing else is coming out blue with an another illness .And I suffer from heavy periods and I had to get the d and c .that was painful .And Iam like come on GoD this is enough please dont give me an onther illness cause this happening too fast.On the other with the panic attacks and the crazy ocd .Thanks for sharing your story this what gets me going In life that Iam not alone huggs keeping you In my prayers

[vs tyrant]

I too was in a horrible hospital but felt like going back as soon as I was released (never followed schedule, overdosed me twice, etc.). I looked at it as a good thing, as I was still wanting help after realizing that the most "intense" form of help at the time was seemingly more of a hindrance.

[lonegael]

CC, Ii just want to say that I really feel for you with the endometriosis on top of everything. My cousin had it and it was a living H#¤%! I really hope that theyy can get a handle on it becauseI know what a wrench physical pain can through in one's mental health. Huggs, hon, and yep, not all hospitals are equal out there. Hang in there. Thinking of you with respect and hope.