What's this?

I don't know whether it's a nervous or mental breakdown. But before I got so angry or I get too emotional, I started hitting myself and screaming. This is in the past but what is this? A nervous breakdown? I get confused to what it is. I remember another time I couldn't take it and I got so angry that I screamed (I was near a beach and it was empty) and started hitting myself with a branch. I got a bruise for that.

Do you have a T or pdoc? They could certainly answer these questions you have.

Not really. What's pdoc?

T is for therapist & pdoc is for psychiatrist.

Is there a mental health team or service available to you?

I'm not sure. I'm fine. This happened about couple of months ago. I was wondering whether it's a nervous breakdown.

Again my friend, only those qualified professionals can give you these answers. I know this is frustrating, but that's the best I can do.
I'm pretty sure it's illegal for a lay person like myself to try& diagnose the things you ask.

I can understand wanting to know why you were behaving in that hurtful way towards yourself. Unfortunately, no one here at PC has the ability to diagnose anyone for anything. We can only support you and help you find "your way" to get the answers you are looking for.

I imagine what happened could be unnerving to you, scary even. It's much less scary when we can get answers from the professionals with direction in how to help ourselves change behaviors that are harmful to us. I hope you can find your answers very soon!

I'm not looking for a diagnose. I was just wondering whether this was a mental breakdown?

We can't tell you if this is or is not a symptom of a mental breakdown for you hon. That would be diagnosing you and we're not allowed to do that at PC. WE are not qualified to do that. You have to see a professional for that kind of information.

Whatever it was, it sounds like it was stressful to you. If that is the case, then it certainly is important and you deserve to have a professional helping you with this issue.

Take good care!

You're right. I'm sorry for being such a waste and idiot.

Hey there HappyCheeks,

You are not a waste or an idiot. We just can not diagnosis. As you are aware there are MH teams out there. Are you not seeing a CPN, Psychiatrist or a GP regularly? CPN would help you identify why you do hurt yourself.

Don't worry

Hey HappyCheeks,

I would have a chat with your GP and ask if you can speak to someone in your local MH Team if you don't have a CPN or Psych already.

There are other people you can chat to ie The Samaritians who can help you out and even give 1:1 sessions. Or you can try researching what help is out there in your local area for you. I took that step and I am so luckily to have my Support Network that I have through my Support Workers.

happycheeks: I have given myself black eyes in the past! How embarrassing having to make up a lie as to how I got it! Like everyone else said we can't tell you why you do it or what you have. I don't think my experiences doing this was a nervous breakdown, your story may be different, you have to get professional help, you need it and deserve it.

I agree with this. Also here to add a voice of understanding. I've done quite a bit of stuff like this too. While I've not given myself a black eye, I've done much voice-thrashing screaming and flailing, smacked my hands into things, repeatedly slapped my head (hard), repeatedly thrown myself against walls, and have even bit myself in the arm. I've not done any of it intentionally or with forethought. In fact, there wasn't much thinking at all going on at such times(!) Just sheer being out of control, and many times it would happen so fast that there was no time to get rational in order to even attempt mellowing or stopping it. It's no fun to admit these things, but it's the only way to let you know that I understand that fear, happycheeks and definitely understand your being concerned what is happening and hope that you are able to gain some understanding talking to a T about it. Lots of

(And you are NEVER a waste or an idiot, happycheeks!!! It worries you and we're hear to listen, give a shoulder and help as we are able. )

(((happycheeks)))) I wouldn't call it a nervous breakdown, because even when nerves are the culprit, they aren't breaking down, they're doing the only job they know to do!

Maybe it was some mental break with reality? Can you recall if there was any particular element in your life that occurred ahead of it? (like an argument or phone call with someone, or frustration over an issue)???

You're not an idiot, and I hope you can work on not calling yourself names. You believe everything you tell yourself.

I can see that you're concerned because maybe you're afraid it will occur again. I'd like to think you could prevent it also, from occurring again.

It could be you were stressed beyond measure and barring attacking someone else, you attacked yourself, feeling you are worthless or an idiot or such?

here where I live and work hitting yourself and screaming is called performing self injury acts. self injuring your self, berating your self, attacking your self.

a mental breakdown here where I live and work is where someone cant stop crying, shaking, depressed, avoiding others, talking incoherently, sometimes catatonic,

self injury behaviors can be part of the symptoms of any mental disorder so I suggest contacting your treatment providers and letting them know whats happening. there are antidepressants and antianxiety meds that can help with this.

Happycheeks you are no 'Idiot'.

A nerv breakdown is (to me), a moment of calm and a moment of disorder.
Many many friends of mine have gone through what doc's say is a break down. It is like Sabby says, we cannot dx anybody; we can offer support though.

My only support for you would be to say talk to you're peers, family and friends.
Find a doc who you trust.

I hoped this helped.

Thanks everyone for your reply.

At the ranch where I board my horses in California & went to when I was living there, there was a lady who was in the process of adopting her granddaughter (3 years old at that time). The mother was abusive to the child & would slap her for absolutely nothing. The little girl was at the ranch & the grandmother had told her not to touch something in a very kind way.....the little girl walking behind her was slapping herself in the face.....at the age of 3.....that was what her mother always did when she did something wrong....so the little girl was doing it to herself.....it was what she thought she deserved for doing something wrong. I felt so sad for the little girl.....I commented to her grandmother about it & she said that they do have a wonderful child psychologist working with her to help her get through the abuse she had experienced in only those few years of her life.

Our background, things that have happened to us......all go into the learned neuropathways in our mind that cause our reactions to situations. Stressful situations bring out reactions in us that we may not even know where then come from if we have no memories of what happened to us at early ages.....I can't remember much of anything before the age of 5 personally....but know that my development began at birth. If our tendency to hurt ourselves when stressful things happen in our life, then it's probably a good indication that professional help is necessary....it's important to learn skills in handling stressful situations so that we can handle ourselves well into our older years. I think DBT is one of the good therapies that really help teach skills that seem to be lacking in many peoples lives. It teaches skills to learn how to handle distress (stressful situations that go beyond symple stress), skills that teach how to recognize & handle our emotions, & also skills for dealing with other people so as to lessen the stress that can be caused to difficult communication issues that all the time come up between people. You might want to look up DBT on the internet & check out the skills that it talks about.

Don't know if your parents would be open to getting you professional help, but it sounds like it might be a very good idea since what you are describing sounds like a very unhealthy handling of a stressful situation & professionals could really help you understand what is going on with yourself. It's a very good thing to learn at your age the ability to get in touch with your emotions & learn how to react to situations to be able to keep yourself under control.