I don't like people spending money on me

I've had this problem for most of my life where I don't like it when people pay for things for me. At the same time, it's nice and it makes me happy but I can't help but feel guilty.

Also, since I'm going to have to go to a mental hospital soon, I'm so scared my boyfriend will have to pay a huge amount of money. I know if it's an emergency situation here in Sweden, it shouldn't cost anything, but the idea of him having to pay for my crap terrifies me. Thinking about it right now is making me freak out.

Also, he has to pay for my ticket back to America (which I can't go back they won't make me go back) it's like $1000 dollars it makes me freak out.

I understand Summersover. I even have trouble having someone pay for my dinner eating out. Even having someone pay for coffee is difficult. I feel embarrassed and inadequate.

I hate this as well, I can totally relate. It makes me feel like I'm being treated like a little girl who doesn't know how to do anything for myself when it comes to men.
I went on a date a couple of years ago with some guy and he paid for a hotel and room service and it was all mega expensive because it was a 5 star. I was like saying over and over let me pay for something at least and he wouldn't. He refused to let me carry my own suitcase and I felt overwhelmed by it and it got to the point that I had to tell him "You're making me feel awkward" as were walking down a street with my leopard print suitcase and he handed it over. I felt so bad and I was cringing so badly. I didn't see that guy again cause it completely put me off him.

As for anyone else buying me stuff I appreciate it but feel like it could be better spent on someone else who needs it. :3

these days men are not like they used to be considering ettiquette. i would love it if a man carried my bags and opened a door for me, but that is just how i look at it. i don't think i mean it to be feminest but i just like the feeling of women and children first. i guess im kinda old fashioned.

Gosh. I would hate that. I think some of my current issues with best friend actually stems from me helping her financially lately. Being not in balance does not seem good.

But also I feel deep guilt if I'm just given a small present because it cost people money...

No I agree, it's nice and all but it's not for everyone. I personally thought I'd like that kinda thing but I did bloody not haha! Although if I'm with someone and I don't like at least get a birthday card.. then that's my threshold for it being not good. I'd mostly only want a card though. My mum puts money in them and I sneak it back into her wallet usually.

In OP's case though, the money's spent on a serious help, and accepting help won't come easy I guess.

That ticket back to America means you don't have to overstay and get banned from entering the country again in the future. However it turns out, your life will be going through a lot of changes, and it has to be for the better. Maybe you can cherish the time you still have with your friends over there, say thanks and get yourself ready to move on. In a way, I guess you could pay back for the help offered right now through your interaction with them, It was for the trip back home, not a guilt trip, I don't know your BF personally, but I'm pretty sure of that.

G'luck for your life moving forward.

(I haven't read your recent posts, I'll get to them when I have the time, take care.)

I hear ya on this! I am terrible at recieving gifts even from my family on my birthday. It's just really awkward. However I am ok with the handmade kind. My now ex boyfriend, keeps buying me things, it's just so very nerve rattling. What is the underlying cause of the ticket back to US? Are you afraid it will cause your relationship issues? Or is it that he is paying for it? I know my issue was because I knew one I was gone it would be forever. I ended up in the hospital because of it

I have to go back to the US because my reason for staying here in Sweden isn't good enough. My boyfriend and I are engaged and we were planning on getting married in 2017, but at this point I don't know when we can get married.

I just don't want him to have to pay for a ticket back for me...like there was so much effort and money spent to come here...I don't want him to waste his money on me.

And I don't want to go back to the US, because I left to get away from my abusive family anyways and I'm scared of being alone because I might not have a place to go. There was only one friend who offered a place to stay so maybe I'll do that.

I just don't want to be away from my boyfriend again.

What do you mean your reason for staying isn't good enough? I understand that. I did a huge move myself to get away from toxic people. I know how hard it must be to even contemplate a separation. If you need to talk I'm here. I wish you all the luck in things going as planned

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We talked to the Migration Agency to extend my stay so I had time to apply for citizenship, and they told me that my reason wasn't good enough and they wouldn't extend my stay. We tried to convince them twice.

Oh. That's terrible. Why can you not get married sooner then?

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I told them my entire situation, and they won't let me stay.

When I do in fact spend the money, I feel a big rush, but as soon as I am home I am resmorseful and feel terrible I did so. Then I feel guilty I am unable to spend money to help my children out or give some to chairty. Why waste it on me? Is this part of my bipolar?

Definately bipolar because of the rush it gives, however there is nothing wrong with spoiling yourself sometimes. I know it's hard but you shouldn't beat yourself up for spending your money, unless you are spending money v needed to pay your bills, and other necessities.

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Well and you ask you inside in you why you are freak out when people spend money on you? Maybe you are to orgolious person and you dont accept money from others you want to make everihung yourself