Something I want to share with you...

Hi all,

I have something to tell you and I really need your support, a lot. I’ve been very quiet here for a long time and it’s because I haven’t been feeling well for what seems like a very long time. I got so sick once that I was put in the hospital for 2 days. My doctor was at a loss as to what was causing my problem. We did many tests, but they didn’t reveal anything. Finally, we decided to send me to a local medical center to have a battery of tests run, they tested me for everything over a three day period. It wasn’t fun.

I got the result back from my tests yesterday, and one of the problems they revealed was that I have a bleeding ulcer. It’s a minor one, and can be treated with a healthy diet and medication. They also did a colonoscopy. They discovered a polyp. This along with some other tests, and the symptoms I’ve been having have lead them to diagnose that I have Colorectal Cancer. They want me to return to have an exploratory of the polyp done to see if there are any detectable cancer cells. But they are pretty certain of the diagnosis. I can’t have the surgery done until close to Thanksgiving. My family is in very bad shape financially, and we need to wait until then to be able to afford to do this. The good thing about this cancer is that if detected early, it’s 90-95% treatable with a full recovery. The bad thing is, if it’s too far along, the party’s over. It’s the second most fatal type of cancer.

That’s the story gang. I really need your support. I’m scared beyond rational thought, and I don’t know what to do. I don’t want any sympathy, just some hands to hold, a hug here and there, and some wishes that they turn out to be wrong and this is nothing. Christ, I’ve told my wife and kids about the ulcer, but not about the cancer. I don’t know how…They’ll be devastated.

I’m sorry I didn’t tell you all what was going on sooner, I didn’t want to worry you with my problems. I hope you’ll forgive me for that. A few people here knew, but not many. Thanks to them for keeping me sane.

So, that being said, can I have some hugs? Please?

Love,
Greg

((((((((((Greg)))))))))) I am so sorry that you have been carrying this around without being able to share it with us. It must be a horrible feeling. My hand is out for the holding. Just be forewarned that my fingers (and everything else that possibly can be) are crossed in hopes that this does turn out to be nothing.

You get 3 more hugs from me and the little ones
((((((((Greg))))))) ((((((((Greg))))))) ((((((Greg))))))))
Angie, Amy, and Laura

((((((((((((((((((((((greg))))))))))))))))

I just wanted you to know that you are in my thoughts.
Keep us posted.

Leslie

((((((((((((((((((( GREG ))))))))))))))))))))))

You're in my thoughts. I do hope that you're getting good support there in your physical life as well.

Sending wishes full of peace to you.

Kimmydawn

Hugs, prayers, hand holding, you've got whatever you need and more! Thanks for letting us know. You know we all care about you so much---I think that you are probably one of the most lovable around here. I'm sure this must be very hard for you. I understand how much harder it would be to tell your family. {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Bp}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

I am sending you my most positive feelings. I am sorry you are going through this. I have a dumb question, if it's life and death, which itis, why put off the biopsy until November? Do it now and do whatever treatment is necessary. There are programs to help. Okay, dumb question but? Please feel loved and supported here.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Greg}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} You have my hand to hold anytime you need or want it. Got one favor to ask of you, though. Please let's not call it cancer until we know for sure? No need to borrow trouble until it pushes down our door.

Don't know if you know, but I'm awating test results myself. Hang in, Hun, and we'll wait together, ok? You're in my prayers daily, ok?

Love ya!

Greg - I just finished my prayers for you. There will be more on their way. You're in my heart.

Emmy

Girl,

I'm sorry I made the mistake of not sharing this before too. It's not the first time I've been in pain and not wanted to bother other people with my problems. But I'll be that first one to tell someone else that they should open up and get support from this most wonderful place. Maybe someday I'll learn to listen to my friends and take my own advice eh? I'll take that hand and hold it tight if you don't mind. And I hope we get to know each other and become friends.

Sending you some hugs if you want them.

Greg

Wow! Three for the price of one! I really appreciate the love and kindness, this place has the most caring people that I've ever known. I'm still trying hard to wrap my brain around all of this, but it's so hard. I guess I just need some time. Please give some hugs back to your little ones and love them with all you've got. I've got three and one grandchild, aren't they great?

((((((((((Angie, Amy, and Laura))))))))))

Greg

Les,

Your thoughts are a great place to be right now, and I appreciate it so much. I really need all the support I can get right now. I will let you know as I find anything out. I hope you're doing well, I'll keep you in my thoughts too.

(((((((((((Leslie)))))))))))

Greg

Kimmy,

I know I will get all the support in the world here when I finally figure out how to tell my family. They've been thru so much with me, and this is just something else to deal with. I just found out that we have have family coming over tonight and I may just tell them altogether then.

Thank you for keeping me in your thoughs, I need your support very much. I hope your day is peaceful and you find the happiness you deserve.

((((((((((Kimmydawn))))))))))

Greg

Greg, I've been in suspense for ages. BUT, I would not call it cancer until the biopsy is in. Lots of polyps show up in colons and turn out to be benign. I bet this one is a benign one and that is very easy to deal with. Please try to see if you can have this done before Thanksgiving, okay? Fayeroe sends you "nose"....Timmee sends you purrs, Mikee sends you mischief, Amsu sends you dignity and Pearlcat sends kneads.....lots of them. Teddyjack has your back. He's fought wolves and coyotes and it ain't no hill for a stepper!! Okay?????? Love you, Pat

Dearest inky,

We've known each other for a long time haven't we? Knowing that you and the rest care about me means so very much. I knew something was wrong, and the doctor mentioned this as a possibility, but it hadn't sunk in until I heard it for sure. I'm going to keep my head up and do what I have to do, and pray that they are wrong. If they aren't, I'll make it thru somehow, someway.

I hope that you are doing OK, you have no idea how much I worry about you. I want to share a bowl of my ice cream with you someday

((((((((((inky))))))))))

Greg

This is for you, Sweetie~~~~~~~~~

Ripple

If my words did glow with the gold of sunshine
And my tunes were played on the harp unstrung,
Would you hear my voice come thru the music,
Would you hold it near as it were your own?

It's a hand-me-down, the thoughts are broken,
Perhaps they're better left unsung.
I don't know, don't really care
Let there be songs to fill the air.

Ripple in still water,
When there is no pebble tossed,
Nor wind to blow.

Reach out your hand if your cup be empty,
If your cup is full may it be again,
Let it be known there is a fountain,
That was not made by the hands of men.

There is a road, no simple highway,
Between the dawn and the dark of night,
And if you go no one may follow,
That path is for your steps alone.

Ripple in still water,
When there is no pebble tossed,
Nor wind to blow.

But if you fall you fall alone,
If you should stand then who's to guide you?
If I knew the way I would take you home.

La dee da da da, La da da da da, Da da da, Da da, Da da da da da
La da da da, La da da, Da da, La da da da, La da, Da da.

WW,

Thank you so much for the positive thoughts, they mean a lot to me. You are truly good people. I have decided to wait until around Thanksgiving for the surgery because of our financial situation. We are truly in very bad shape. If I wait until then, I'll have a few vacation days, and two days for Thanksgiving to recover, and I won't have to miss work. Losing any pay right now would be devastating to the family. I'd just rather take my chances. That may be hard to understand, but for me, taking care of my family has always come first. Thanks for thinking of me though, and please, keep the good thoughts, I really need them.

((((((((((wisewoman))))))))))

Greg

Tomi,

I will hold that hand, and you can hold mine. It's so tough waiting for someone to tell you life threatening news. I'm trying not to focus on the cancer, but it's so hard to do. It's like everytime I look in the mirror now I see a big red c on my forehead. But for you, I won't say it anymore until I know for sure. I hope that everything is fine with you hun, but it will be nice to have someone to wait with. You'll be in my prayers everyday too, I promise.

Love you too
Greg

Emmypoo,

Thank you for the prayers! The next time you pray could you ask Her to make me look like Brad Pitt? I love you soo much sweetie, you've been so supportive thru all of this. I don't know how I'll ever repay you. You are a fine lady, and I'm grateful to call you my friend.

((((((((((Emmy))))))))))

Greg

I stand in your corner for any need you may have. My prayers for you and yer family continue. I agree with those that have brought up the benign possibility.......each day as it comes strategy. That's my input.

With enormous support and an open ear strong enough to listen.

Hi Pat,

I'm hoping that you're absolutely right, and that this turns out to be nothing to worry about. There were other things that led them to this dx though. I'll try to get this done sooner if i can work it out financially, but I'm not getting my hopes up. Just kust keep good thoughts for me, and if everything works out OK, you owe me a dance, OK?

((((((((((Pat))))))))))

Love you bunches,
Greg

"If I wait until then, I'll have a few vacation days, and two days for Thanksgiving to recover, and I won't have to miss work. Losing any pay right now would be devastating to the family. I'd just rather take my chances. "

Sweetpea....I have a feeling that when your family hears this genius plan, they may just change your mind. Taking care of your family involves more than simply bringing in a paycheck for a particular one or two month. Taking care of your family means doing everything in your power to stay with them, healthy and strong, to share your love and support, as long as possible.

This means getting this biopsied and treated ASAP. There is no wiggle room in there honey. None.

Emmy's got her thigh-high boots on and is kicking some butt now. No more nice girl. Kisses.

Hi Zen sweetie,

I knew you'd be there for me hun. It's a tough time right now, but we both know about tough times and how to get thru them, right? I'm with all of you in hoping that this will be benign. I'm hoping everything is going well for you. I've been thinking a lot about you. Don't forget to send me a letter and catch me up on things, OK?

I'll try to stay strong, I promise. Knowing that I have all of you on my side will be an immense help.

((((((((((Zen))))))))))

Love you,
Greg

bp I am sure you are wished more good than you can imagine! This is SO scarey... the "c" word... regardless of what we try to tell ourselves, and others... the fear remains. I am so sorry that you are going through this.

As for your not telling family... if you can maintain your normal self (I don't know how you could..) and you really want to not share... then try. But if you pick up a different reaction to what you say and do around them, then they might also know something is awry... it could be a very "healing" time for family if you do find yourself able to share. You shouldn't (and you really don't have to) have to carry this by yourself.

This is one reason I haven't decided to have sucha test... I will also do the camera pill, but the drawback is, yes, if they find polyps they can't remove them right then like they do with the "tube."... and the time inbetween would be devastating to me...

It's a good thing you have done... all this testing. Have you shared with your doctor about not telling anyone else? He may have some good advice for you along those lines...

my thoughts are with you... think good thoughts and make that polyp GO AWAY ! ok? we'll all think that energy for you too! (((((((((((((((((((((((((bp)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Aw bp, I am so sorry, and I hope that it doesn't turn out to be cancer. I'm sorry this reply isn't much use, but I'll be thinking of you.