Is Crohn's making my husband angry?

My husband was diagnsed with Crohn's abot 3 years ago and he has been very angry to the point of being abusive. His outbursts cause me to be afraid and anxious. He does'nt mean the things he does. He was never like this before and I love him and I want to help him. But everytime he yells or grabs me I have flashbacks and then I am depressed for days. I need some advice. Thank you all.

Crohn's is no excuse, no one has the right to treat you this way.

Can you let his doctor know what is going on? At least so they know and can also screen out possible med side effect.

Are you in counseling? Please find counseling if at all possible. Can you go stay with family members or friends?

From what you have written - you are being abused. Please call the national domestic violence hotline, they run 24/7 to help you with a safety plan. Let us know how you do also if you like, folks here do care.

1-800-799-SAFE (7233)

look through this checklist too:
http://www.ndvh.org/educate/what_is_dv.html

I mean he does'nt hit me or call me names. And I read on his prednisone that it causes mood swings. That and I think he may be dealing with depression and ever since the doc said if he kept goin down the road he is, not eating right, smoking, etc. that this Crohns could very well kill him within a year, he's been acting this way. He cries alot too. And he's depressed about his looks cause he lost about 30 lbs since this started. He does'nt look bad to other people only himself.

You deserve a safe home though. You said he is yelling at you and grabbing you, that is not okay. Your experience counts, you are worth while, the fact that you are depressed and having flashbacks means you can use help and support. I really encourage you to get therapy, to help you be safe first.

Therapy can also help you figure out how to deal with him. I understand that he is going through a hard time but his behavior isn't working for you, and I personally think this is important to focus on.

He needs help, he needs to be in therapy himself.

You are in a caregiver situation. Caregivers never ever deserve being abused. He needs to not lash out at you. If he can't control this then he needs help til he can control it.

I feel very strongly about this. His meds may be causing mood swings, he is ill also, he may not mean to be abusive, but he is scaring you and you are anxious. You deserve to be well treated.

You do need to speak to the MD or prescribing DR. because the steroids cause drastic mood swings and also, can produce rage and aggressive behaviors... it is a side effect, and can be fixed.

They can lower his dosage and he needs to do that under supervision so that his adrenal system stays intact ... and his Dr. needs to get him on the patch or something to quit the smoking.

As far as it being an effect of Crohn's, I don't think entirely so.

Sounds more like steroids, and his depression over a terrible diagnosis...where are the options he has to improve this illness?

Where is the support from the community of medical professionals to inform and educate your husband and his family?

Questions you can ask and get answered, for sure.

So, if they reduce his anti-inflammatory meds, he will calm dowm and perhaps he needs something to take to help him calm down while he's adjusting.

There are lots of things you can do, as caregiver and observer, so I hope you make them listen.

The Dr. can also speak to him about handling the effects os steroid drugs. He may need phys therapy or a sport or something to physically use up the performance action of the medicine.

No alcohol, as that would worsen the moods and the effects on him.

Hopefully, he will get some options, and whether he can be helped thru a new nutritional diet (see nutritionist who deals with this disease) or other complimentary therapies, he doesn't have to be left like this... that's for sure.

Good luck. Go in with notebook and pen and take notes too, as Drs. seem to flourish out of complacency when they see you are on top of solution seeking.

Best to you.

Been there.

Peace and comfort,
night
xoxoxox

Hi thunderbear,

Largely agree with other posters. I have Crohn's and bipolar II.

Prednisone can mess with your mind. Is the doctor open to trying other meds? Please talk to the doctor about this right away. If the doctor doesn't want to talk about the mental side effects of Prednisone, get another doctor.

I am surprised at the doctor's statement that the Crohn's could kill your husband within a year if he doesn't improve his lifestyle. Crohn's is an awful disease, but often manageable. Even smoking and poor diet shouldn't kill him in a year, I wouldn't think. Is there something else bad your husband is doing?

Please be careful with your husband's behavior. I believe you when you say he does not mean what he is doing, but that just means he's not fully in control of his actions, and that's risky.

If you are in the US, please check out CCFA for support recommendations.

http://www.ccfa.org/

Good luck.

Hi there,
I live with a man who was diagnosed with ocular myasthenia gravis 8 years ago. He is on continuous prednisone which is increased to 90mgs per day during relapses which is then slowly tapered.

I am also a medical professional and concerned that the medical professionals arenot explaining to patients and relatives the side effects of prednisone.

I would love to hear from other's experiences but am struggling at the moment with my partners moods, irritability, walking on egg shells and afraid of an outburst. He too says awful things and blames me.

Knowing it is the steroids makes life easier but he won't acknowledge this so I can't force him to see his consultant.

Can anybody offer any advice please or share their experience so that I know its not me going mad.

Many thanks

Hi BlueAngel,
Youre not going mad. Prednisone, as you know, causes horrible mental side effects. Ranging from rage to anxiety to suicidal thoughts. Not only is the mind affected, but the body as well. My husband was on 60 mgs a day then tapered. And a Salumedrol shot every month. This went on for 7 years. The effect on his bones is devastating. His hip joints are severely deteriorated. His spine is, too. His shoulder joints are bad. He has osteoperosis in his legs. His teeth are gone. But with his Crohns, he cant take Nsaids for his inflammation due to the bleeding risk. His doctors only use Pred if he has a bad flare up. They know about the anger it causes. Ive told them about it. Most people (as you can see) do not understand that certain meds cause anger in the people taking them. It IS an excuse. When people, like our husbands, have to take this medication, they are not themselves. And people who dont understand or experiance it for themselves, they automatically prejudge them as abusive.
My advice to you would be to talk to your husband's doctor(s) about lowering the dose as much as possible without affecting its effectivness. And also, see if the doc can put him on a mood med or even an anxiety med. Those help my husband when he has to go on Pred. You should be able to talk to his consultant yourself about the side affects. I agree with you about medical professionals not being very up front about this certain side effect. They need to stress to their patients beforehand. That way the patient knows themself that it is the med causing the mood swings. I hope things go well for you and your husband. I know what you are going through...

I am glad to see people posting here about the steroids. I have had to use steroids since I was a child. It has caused such terrible anger and complete personality changes. I have had a hard time convincing prescribers of the seriousness of my behavior while on prednisone. They do not see me outside of the office and so they may just think I get slightly irritable.
The problem is that when I am very sick, prednisone is THE only effective treatment. So, I have in the past chosen to remain ill, rather than to take the prednisone and become a lunatic..

I empathize for caregivers here who have had to deal with their loved ones. I have had to warn people in my life when I am on the prednisone to stay away from me and not to take my moodiness and abuse personally. My behavior is not me, it is the medicine. I become verbally hostile and aggressive. Some people will just not understand, and that is the hardest part. Sometimes the person who is given prednisone is not even aware of this serious side effect.

I often think that when a physician prescribes prednisone that it should automatically include something like a benzodiazepine or other sedative to go along with it. I have never been offered a sedative in addition to the prednisone, but I think if in the future it's necessary that I take prednisone, I will request a sedative as well.

Also, it may help to know that some people are very sensitive to prednisone and they may need a reduced dose. Prednisone doesn't mix with SSRI's and some other psych drugs, so do your research.

Fortunately I have not had a flare up requiring prednisone in over a year. As a matter of fact I was on it shortly before having a "nervous breakdown" last summer, and I have wondered if that is what prompted my mental health crises.

chrones can mess with your emotions making you very angry and sometimes even suicidal, especially during flare ups, this may in part be due to the medication/steroids, but may also be in part due to the effects of the chrones itself. with the correct medication though these thoughts/emotions should return to normal

Hello, yellowted. He is suicidal now. I cannot leave him alone. I had to even hide my flexeril because Im scared he might try something. His self image is very bad also. He cant work & our family is struggling. Today has been particularly bad. He went to a new Gp in hopes of finding relief from the pain. But by new law, abdominal pain does not qualify you for narcotics. Then the doc asked if he had ever been tested for Hiv, which triggered my own obsessive phobia. I told him yes, every time we went to a new doc he/she tested him. This doctor said it was because he was so thin (which right now,.hes lost 8 lbs hes down to 120 & hes 5'11). So now my husband says "Im so skinny I look like an Aids patient?" This was on the way home. Now hes depressed due to the pain AND his apperence. I tried explaining to him that the new doc didnt know his healthy normal weigjt is only 135 and hes never seen him at 108 like I have. But now its in his head he looks sick. Im doing all I can, but I think hes giving up. I cant get him to laugh or smile or talk. I made him take a probiotic today.