time is distorted

would like to ask you guys about time,

time has felt distorted for couple of years, recently flashbacks have been feeling like a parallel time running alongside, rather than images that come & go, been thinking mayb that's why i've felt like a stranger for so long, homesick feeling, feeling like i miss myself, mayb i'm not really in this time, mayb that's why i've felt like a passenger in this body, could i really actually still b there, trapped in a timewarp, im confused over what is real, is this normal?,

passing of time feels like a con, like ive discovered it doesnt really exist as we thought, warped, or is it me?

Hi Laura!!

You are not stuck in a time warp somewhere, I promise!! I understand what you are experiencing and I have been to similar places with perception.

It sounds to me like you are experiencing some dissociative symptoms with your PTSD, which is not uncommon, although can be scary and uncomfortable.

This sounds a lot like Depersonalization and Derealization which are dissociatve symptoms. They can be classified as Dissociative disorders, but just because you are experiencing these symptoms does not mean you have a dissociative disorder.

You can check out the Dissociative Disorders forum and look at some of the stickies which have definitions of these experiences if you like, or you can do a google search.

If you have a T, I would suggest discussing these symptoms with them. These feelings do not mean you're crazy...sometimes they can make a person feel like that, and you are doing okay. It just comes with the territory sometimes.

I'm here for you if you need to talk, and don't hesitate posting to the DD forum if you have questions about anything.

Take care!

I have experienced what you describe, often. As Elysium said, it sounds like dissociation. That feeling like you are a passenger in your body, oh, that's really rough. I have it happen a lot and it still weirds me out.

Dissociation is a reaction we developed to keep ourselves safe when everything around us was dangerous. It was a brilliant way to cope with overwhelming circumstances. Unfortunately, it can persist in the present and cause distress when we want to be connected and aware.

You're not alone.

thanks Elysium, i was abit afraid no one would reply thinking im abit crazy, have not been in T very long, some things have got worse, havent told T, fear that he may want to give up on helping me, no one wants someone getting worse, i know how it sounds, but feels so real, your words are so re-assuring..... Skeksi, thanks, helps to know not alone, not the only passenger out there

I have experienced the same feelings, Laura. I have dissociative symptoms with my PTSD too, as well as the time warp you feel.

My therapist explained that trauma actually does cause changes in the brain and that a person with PTSD has a very different experience of past and present, and probable future.

He also says the brain can heal--and that we can get back to functioning normally.

Don't give up. My dissociative symptoms are new to me, but my inner children knew all about this part of me, the adult sky dancer did not.

When it happened something went snap inside and I start behaving self-destructively. It has been terrrifying to say the least.

I'm very interested in connecting with you and with others who have PTSD with dissociative symptoms.

Laura.... (if okay)

When one starts therapy, alot of times things tend to get and/or feel worse because we are starting to work on the things that have haunted us the most during our lives. It brings everything closer to the surface. This is very scary, but is very normal and I guarantee you that your T will understand this and is prepared to help you through it!!

If you have trauma in your past and find it difficult to trust others, all of your experiences right now make complete sense. I experience similar things myself.

I just wanted you to know that you're not alone, and you're not crazy, and that if things do feel like they're getting worse, this can be a normal process when beginning T. I encourage you to communicate these feelings and perceptions with your T. He/She will be glad you did. They will not run from you or be disappointed in you. Chances are they are expecting this, as it happens so often for people when they start addressing their issues.

Hang in there, and keep posting for support if/when you're comfortable. You are doing a very good thing for yourself in going to T.

If you ever want to talk privately, I am always available by PM.

Take care!!

P.S. You are sooo NOT crazy.

I have been stuck in the days after I was attacke dfo rthe last 2 years - time seems to hav eno meaning - days melt into days - names of days??... I just know work day or home day..

I disassociate a lot and feel that this new person ois not the me I was - and she isnt - you are not alone - hang in there

that is so spot on, i keep thinking time isnt really moving, like i know something no one else knows, ive discovered its a trick, it sounds crazy, like you i dont feel like the same person either, like ive split into pieces, me, the voice i can hear feel's trapped in time, while my body got accelerated somewhere, & my mind is floating, out of reach, which ive no control over, comforting to know i'm not alone thanks phoenix

You are SO not alone! i haven't felt like who i was in years. i see pictures of myself as a child and i can't feel who i was. i can't even connect to who i was even 20 years ago (i'm 45). i forget the things i've done, accomplished in life, am capable of doing. i forget i'm more than someone who sits at the computer most of the day. i've forgotten myself. This is because i had to forget what was happening to me as a child in order to face the day and live. i got so good at it, i didn't know when to stop forgetting. That happens to a lot of us.

Elysium, as usual, is very wise in what she's saying to you. All this is normal as you finally start letting your inner thoughts, your true self be heard. We get so good at stuffing down the bad stuff we lose parts of ourselves with it. As we loosen things up and allow them out, we get jumbled as the pieces try to right themselves. Your T will not be surprised to be discovering these things about you and is wise to take a step back as he/she evaluates things. If you sense your T can't handle it, talk to him or her about these feelings. In the occasional event that's true, know you deserve better and find it.

You deserve to heal. You are NOT crazy. You survived the insane.

wow, your situ kinda puts mine into perspective sound as if you've been through alot, such wise words you give, i value your advice, your a sweetheart, ive had so many amazing people give me advice since being on here, amazing people that i didnt even know existed, that have been more helpful & giving than anyone ive ever met.

Its funny you should say "if you sense your T cant handle it", i did sort of sense that but just thought it was me, there have been a few moment's when he kinda freeze's & look's like a rabbit caught in the headlights, & he seems lost for words, but i assume that's cos im talking rubbish & he cant make sense of it, i assumed he could handle anything!