[cross]

I get medicine start a few days ago and feels better, I don't feel lost, I can function and don't have any panick attack again everytime I see something remind me of the past. But I ma having flashback so bad feeling sad and melancholy all day till I fall dawn when I get home crying so hard feeling

been a while I didn't get flashback but now seems like the grieving cycle comes to the bottom again. feeling sad missing him but hate and afraid too because when I guess i can not afford to meet him too coz I will feel so small and like a crap for him. He done a good job suck my self esteem until feeling un worthed and crap myself

I wonder how to get rid off the flashback..

[Catherine2]

Cross, hello...
You are definitely going through a rough time!
I'm so sorry...
I am glad, though, that you found us and are able to share with us. Many people understand and will give you caring support as you start a new life.

It's going to take time, but I believe that you have the courage to do whatever is necessary for you to have a measure of peace.

Best wishes,
Catherine

[Hugs needed]

Hi Cross!!

If it's safe (((CROSS)))
I know what you are going through.
Flashbacks are very normal while you are going through this dificult time. Are you in T? T will help you work with them.

Remember: "IT's NOT your FAULT". It never was.

they do get less and less as you go through the recovery (healing) stages. Mine have decreased and when I do get them I'm able to get out of the negative state by a lot of self-talking. After you have a flashback try listening to music that makes you Happy.

[heidi4dbt]

Flashbackes are hard but you can get through them. I do. I use what is called grounding which means being aware of what is presently around you.

[cross]

Originally Posted by heidi4dbt

Flashbackes are hard but you can get through them. I do. I use what is called grounding which means being aware of what is presently around you.

it is hard i feel drop down each day recently, when i am alone i cry hard coz can't hold anymore the flashback feel so real. i feel hurt and sad remember the crazy making he made. no yelling, no physically abuse but the crazy making, criticizes he made its hurting so deep. feeling betrayed when i put a lot of trust on him, i trust him became my guard, partner to reach the goal through married, understanding, loving and caring person as i know him at first. but when i feel safe and put all the trust in him he betrayed me with the crazy making he made, put me down, makes me feel like crap, left me alone in the confusing things he made then he throw me away when he feel he can't control me and can't suck my self esteem anymore coz nothing left, so he didn't interest with the game anymore he kick me out so cold and mean.. its so hurt.. and when flashback come the tears come like a flood and the moment in my mind is like real..

i cry and told to myself why you come again.. i already release all my anger and pain, i forgive all the things but why you (flashback ) come again.. i don't know what should i do again

I take The medicine with help me to function though I am having slow motion in activities and also can get rid off the flashback and the feeling drop
I am thinking to change or stop the medicine but I don't know..

[multipixie9]

cross,

i know it is very hard right now. PLEASE be careful with all medication and do not stop it without talking to your T or pdoc. it can make things very bad if you stop medicine all at one time.

when i hurt sometimes i just want to force things to get better, but now i know it takes time for changes to come. go slow and be safe with your body and your mind and feelings.

keep talking and people here will listen. be safe!

leslie/pixies