[jennie]

recently my meds were increased because of depression. i feel better now, but i know that something is still wrong. i don't understand meds. after a while of taking a new dosage, i get too anxious and panicky then dissociate too much. i guess i want a formula for health. how does one get over past issues? are meds the answer?

<font color=purple> Man can will nothing unless he has first understood that he must count no one but himself; that he is alone, abandoned on earth in the midst of his infinite responsibilities, without help, with no other aim than the one he sets himself, with no other destiny than the one he forges for himself on this earth. Jean-Paul Sartre </font color=purple>

i think you have to learn how to relax at times when you get too anxious. sometimes it's all in the mind and the things you fear aren't really happening or has happened in the past. but i understand you because i'm like that too especially when my anxiety overwhelms me and i forget to breathe. that should be the most important thing you should do. take a deep breath once your feelings come back. then give yourself comfort in anyway you can. consciously go away from your stressors. it's not going to help you if you keep on staying or doing things that won't give you the best relief.
rationalize what you did in the past... tell to yourself that you just did what you thought was right and best. and believe it. do you mind if i ask you what specific past issue was that?

: )

[jennie]

i was raped a couple years ago. i just started getting intimate and memories of the rape and childhood abuse surface. i'm in counseling but we don't talk about the past. the past haunts me and i just want to get over it all.

<font color=purple> Man can will nothing unless he has first understood that he must count no one but himself; that he is alone, abandoned on earth in the midst of his infinite responsibilities, without help, with no other aim than the one he sets himself, with no other destiny than the one he forges for himself on this earth. Jean-Paul Sartre </font color=purple>

[Willow]

hi purebugg... great to see you again! Sorry you are going through it with your meds. That stinks. Don't give up though. I believe the symptoms of PTSD are very managable with counseling and drugs. I'm surprised you are not talking about the past though. In order to move past it... you have to move through it in counseling. At least that is my impression of the process. Your counselor knows better than I do. What does your counselor say about being able to get over the past? How do you do that? Sorry to turn questions on you... but trying to give you stuff to ask your counselor if you haven't already asked. Dunno... hope this helps. I'm rambling at this point!

[heatherm]

Hello {{{{{{{{{{{Purebugg}}}}}}}}

You will get better hun....time is on your side and you can look ahead at tomorrow instead of the past. How long have you been going to counselling? Once you build a trust with him/her open yourself up and talk about the past. Sometimes just getting it off your chest is a big help too. From there you will learn that the rape and childhood abuse was not your fault ....I am sensing that you are still carrying guilt from it?

Guilt is too heavy to carry on your shoulders and talking about it and being re-assured that it wasn't your fault will help you get over the past. You deserve to be happy and not carry this inside.

We are all here for you.


Heather

"Life is the art of drawing without an eraser."
~~author unknown

[jennie]

Willow...thanks for your response. well, i did discuss the rape for a few sessions but that ended when the counselor said i was hurting myself by talking about it. that is true in a way it hurts me to work through the past because i do think it was my fault. i'm confused. the past hurts me and i don't know what to do with it.

good suggestion to ask my counselor how to get over the past. i'll ask that. ((((Huggs)))

<font color=purple> Man can will nothing unless he has first understood that he must count no one but himself; that he is alone, abandoned on earth in the midst of his infinite responsibilities, without help, with no other aim than the one he sets himself, with no other destiny than the one he forges for himself on this earth. Jean-Paul Sartre </font color=purple>

[jennie]

heatherm...i have been going to counseling almost a year. i trust my counselor. yes i do carry a lot of guilt. guess i should talk about this more with my counselor. thanks (((Huggs)))

<font color=purple> Man can will nothing unless he has first understood that he must count no one but himself; that he is alone, abandoned on earth in the midst of his infinite responsibilities, without help, with no other aim than the one he sets himself, with no other destiny than the one he forges for himself on this earth. Jean-Paul Sartre </font color=purple>

[Willow]

(((((((purebugg))))))) let me know how it goes in therapy when you ask your T about this.

[Duchess]

Hay Purebugg,
I love Pinky he happens to be one of my favorite cartoon character.
I'm a sum what new member,an "Isolated Reader"hee,hee....
Sorry to hear about your past. within time it will get better.try and focus on yourself & what purebugg needs...
I also was deprived from my childhood,being Physically,Mentaly,& Verbally (raped as a child) abused by my X-stepfather Something I bottled up for 10 years.having so much anger bottled up a lot of my childhood memmories have resurfaced in a very bad way. I try and search for me, but I can't find her. I 'm not even sure at times for what I'm looking for I guess most of us would say a fresh start. I suffer from a major Panic dissorder which causes me to not be able to breath, at times it feels as if too fat *** Elefants have sat in the middle of my chest, and I have no control. I'm very jumpy and my nerves are shot!! I Isolated myself away for such a long time. losing alot of things I loved & that also loved me...{Friends,Boyfriends,Opportunities I shouldv'e taken advantage of. but, of course FEAR held me back!!!
Recently I took myself off of the Meds only b/c I had switched 12 diffrent times within a period of two years, I found myself being even more depressed and angry. being on higher medications doesn't necessarily mean that they are gonna work!!! but then again I'm not the Doc..
I recently was introduced to a doc.named RICO PEREZ he specializes in natural herbs! alot of (Hispanic)people Rave about him.besides I'm tired of the side effects And possiable long term effects meds may have.then again I'm not a doc. keep intouch, hope to chat soon.
your friend, *** Duchess***