old male triggers

I am having a difficult time with men who are ill and have no sense of reason and threatened violence. Big old reaction from the past. I keep wanting to be "good enough" so that I won't be at risk. All a mental state but I am truly having trouble with this and need some support. I am looking over my shoulder and have a powerless feeling and I know it is flashbacks mixed with the present and an old response. Please any practical advice I will gladly take. Well wishes and you all sorrounding me with love and protection will also help. Thanks.

((((((( HUGS )))))))

I can understand how you are feeling, for I too cannot trust men due to my childhood sexual abuse, my dad cheating on my mother / leaving his family for the young babysitter and then having to deal with a husband with a sexual addiction.

The best step I have been able to take to over come this problem is to work on my painful past, no matter how hard it gets, and with retraining my negative inner thoughts..... for what one belief to be true (rather it is correct or not) will always control their present.

LoVe,
Rhapsody -

I am always in fear of being around men, also. I just have to keep telling myself they're not gonna hurt me.

You need to do a lot of challenging your thinking. I think some cognitive therapy would do you a lot of good in this area. I know I benefited from that because my thinking was so warped. Challenging your thinking can do wonders.

I hope this helps some.

challenging our thinking often can't be done my ourselves! We don't realize what we are thinking, even when we say it... that's why working on our cognitions usually requires a T, or a very skillful friend?

I know I'm triggered by thunderstorms, and I know why... but how my thoughts and actions swirl around that...often need the T to point it out...otherwise, I'd never get it, I think.

The recognizing of our triggers is a good first step to healing TC

Thanks guys, I am being so triggered by a neighbor and threats and police and illogical mental illness crap, ON HIS SIDE>

Wisewoman,
That was going to be my question -- who is this guy. Is he acting like he could get physically violent? You can get a protection order, if he does anyt violent towards you. Let me know.

Jane

If you guys need help challenging your thinking, just PM me. I spent 3 years challenging mine!

A good book to help, if you can get it or view it is Mind Over Mood. I don't know who the author is, though.