[HJGS]

I was reading through one of Obsids' last posts....and I was seeing myself., though on a much larger scale.

I'm still cleaning up dirt from off my livingroom rug from the large potted asparagus fern that I threw, the marks on the wall from when I slapped the candle holder down.

All triggered by stupid things, incredibly stupid things....the last one triggered by having the laundry taken away from me and tossed on the ground.

and I feel ashamed I shouldn't be that angry.....what has happened in just a few months, to change me from a self-sufficent woman, that could hold down 3 jobs, and take care of everything, to a snivelling pile of smelly mush that can't leave the house unless she's accompanied by someone............that can't travel, that can't watch certain movies....and the bloody lists goes on and on.......actually! I could go on forever....but as I sit here and think about it, the angrier I get!

I'm going to walk away now......and do something else.

[obsids]

Uh oh... which post was that?

Having the laundry taken from you and thrown on the ground is not stupid. It is upsetting. There are usually reasons why you trigger... something that your brain identifies as danger. You have been through a lot. I don't think you have even been able to process a lot of what has happened to you and really understand how much it has affected you. I'm on Yahell, running invisible, as always, if you need to talk.

*big hugs*

Obsidian

[(JD)]

"shoulds" don't belong in PTSD therapy/talk. This is a really tough dx to live ..."with"... if you can call it that. Reactions happen.

[Mindy]

Thank you Sky. I agree completely. I get really down on myself for some of the symptoms and reactions I have so I'm studying what "normal" reactions are to abnormal situations. I guess I'm not so strange after all. It's good to hear/read others going through the same thing. Not that I'd wish it on anyone, but I'm just glad not to be alone.

[HJGS]

Sorry guys.....unfortunately this is a common occurance......

.....I'm going to leave now.......

I think you're saying that you want to work towards changing so that you might be able to lessen the degree of you reaction to stimulus? Am I understanding that correctly? If so, that's surely something you can work on in therapy.

Take care and keep posting. emmy