Could T be too old? How old is your T?

My T is probably in her mid 30s. I say that because she has like 2 different bachelor degrees, 2 different master's degrees, and 1 PhD. That's a lot of years of education which makes part of me think she's older than that but then she just had a kid 3 years ago and she wasn't considered high risk (which starts at 35 now). Regardless, it's a good working relationship for me. She can play lots of roles with me, from being a hard ***** to being very kind and mentor-ish. It works well. I agree with the statements that older Ts can be very good because they have lots of experience and I also agree that they do need to stay up to date with current directions in the field. Using techniques from 40 years ago probably wouldn't be as applicable or helpful today. I would probably consider seeing an older T if I needed a new one.

I think it really depends on what you're looking for. When I was 25, my T was around 60 - she seemed a bit too old for me, and I didn't connect with her for various reasons. Now, I'm 33, and my T is around 50 - she's somewhat maternal but also seems more on my wavelength, if that makes any sense. We are creating a good connection.

My friend, on the other hand, wanted someone she could really relate to - she's 34, and she found a T who is 27. She was unsure at first if that would be too young, but she went and ended up loving her, so it's working for her.

My T is at least as old as my mom, which is nice. But if she was just older without being tougher, I wouldn't care. I prefer older and tougher, but I'd settle for just tougher. I need someone to tell me to get my **** together, using that language on occasion. And she does. I've always gravitated to people older than me, so I'll keep looking for that until I feel like Pachy.

Yeah, he's a young guy. Very guy-next door. Only been a T for 4 years or so. He pretty much told me that I was the first to have such a strong, positive reaction to him. The first time I laid eyes on him I groaned a little because his face was so aesthetically pleasing. I had kind of been hoping for a man in his sixties, balding...pot belly...maybe missing a few teeth... In retrospect I think it was perfect for me because I never felt intimidated. I knew after only one session that he was a good match for me. And he really ended up being a perfect match so I feel very fortunate.

i figured out my t must be in her late 60s (i'm in my 40s). you would never guess it either by her appearance or how open-minded and up on the latest techniques she is. i also think it's more about how well you click with the t than any particular age. i do like that she has a fair amount of experience although i think she became a t later in life.

id never see a T younger than me. I hav seen social workers younger than me that made me so angry. I doubt a T would be younger than me though i'm in my 20 s i also wouldn't see a T that was sixty or above. I'd be afraid of then dying or retiring.

my t is 50. Pdoc is about 35.

For me, I really had no choice at the time. I was very phobic of driving over bridges and he was the only T not over a bridge. Back then it was him or no one. So whatever age he was, it was going to be him. I had no idea how old he was when I went to my first appointment. I think I just found that we matched well. I can't honestly say if it was because of his age similarity or not...it was just a good fit. And the "good fit" is what mattered most.

Thanks - I could have written this. : -)

Most of my issues are with my mother, so I wanted to find a female T, older than I am. This one's extensive experiences have given her a wisdom and flexibility that i find most valuable (I am sure I'm not an easy client).

Some PC folk have mentioned Ts who seem forever to be trying out new theories on their clients and I would be uncomfortable with that. at the same time, my T is sort of eclectic and moves from one approach to another as needed, but it seems sort of seamless so I don't really notice, at least not at the moment.

One poster here said "I would never see a T younger than myself" - I just wanted to point out that it's easy to say when you are in yr 20;s, but "never say never" is good advice. You can't foresee at what point in your life you will need to go looking for help.

I would agree that maybe it's best to not write anything or anyone out. My ex-therapist is younger than myself and it worked out beautifully.

yeah well probably in the future it would work really well to see someone younger but i'm in my 20s so i can't imagine it right now.

My t is 60. She raised her kids first and then became a t. She's been practicing for about 20 years. I'm 15 years younger than she is, and it works very well for us. She does not seem old whatsoever -- still wears sylish clothing and is nice looking. She does plan to retire in the next few years though. . .which is deeply disturbing to me.

Old people are a lot like people...

Great answers and what a variety of age ranges!

I did not ask the question as an insult to "old people," but more along the lines of trying to figure out if a T that practiced with "crazy people like me" for along time, would be burned out and have less patience if they were older and still practicing.

My last T was close to me in age and it was horrible. So, I wanted to try someone older...but then how old is too old before T's get tired..you know?