Where do I fit in?

to be honest, moosetracks, i find your style of posting to be confrontational and more than a little triggering. i respect that you are taking what you feel is a necessary stance, but i wonder if there are ways which are less accusatory in voicing your opinion. i'm not saying this to hurt you or to quiet you; i'm just making a request that perhaps we can ALL be mindful that there are many survivors/victims of abuse on these boards, and that sarcasm, blame and ridicule aren't supportive ways of getting what you feel is a valid point across. many of us here are at different stages of our healing. many of us still feel somewhat protective of those who abused us also. being told that it's people like us who make it unsafe for the rest of "you" (whoever "you" are?) feels to me like another form of blaming the victim.

again, i'll say that i've been triggered. i know my own issues are coming up from your style of posting. i dont know if what i'm saying is objectively valid, i'm just expressing how i feel. and right now i feel scared to say anything on these string of threads because i worry you will turn it around and make it out like "deli is just as bad as the abusers because she isn't being hardcore like moosetracks". i feel like you're appointing yourself as an arbiter of the community rules, and also feel like you'd rather that victims of abuse (who have never been offenders) don't post here unless they agree with your opinion.

this might be a silly suggestion - but - maybe now that this thread has been reported to the mods, we can let it sit until one of the team gets back to us and clarifies the rules?

The other threads were not closed due to people here being "offenders"...if that were the case, those people would no longer be members. Also, you may recall that the OP indicated in one of those closed threads that she did not realize that her children seeing her being abused was abusive to them. The OP also discussed SI as abusive to others. Neither of those issues makes her an "offender".

YOU may think that your posts are not abusive, however, I do. And that is the heart of the issue here. There are many different ideas of what is included in abusive behavior and what is not. I believe that continuing to "harp" on the same person, for the same thing, over and over again...without waiting for input from admins, is abusive.

I also find it interesting that you chastise one person for not disclosing an issue right away, yet your own profile is blank, and you have made no introductory post.

Thank you to everyone who is willing to give me a chance. I am willing to answer your specific concerns privately if you feel comfortable with that, to minimize disruption here.
I don't want to cause problems, and I would expect to be banned if I do. I have found this place to be a source of great support over the past 4 years even though I was terrified to post anything until a few months ago. But if the moderators feel that my presence here is too triggering I will respect their decision.