T's Trying to Teach

Finally, I have homework. T wants me to learn and practice mindfulness before we go deeper into trauma work. She loaned me a book and a CD and I am instructed to practice everyday. Yaaaay, I've been waiting to get back into a 'real' homework routine.

I really want to show her next week that I've learned something. Unfortunately I'll be out of town until then so when can I study and practice?

I believe it was Thich Nhat Hanh who said: Peace is every step.

Savor every bite. Focus on every breath. Feel every step. Laugh, smile, cry from the heart. Wear life like a loose garment. And remember.. in the toolbox of life, meditation is a great big f'n hammer.

This is what I've been taught, anyway.



ETA: What book and CD did she lend you? Maybe we can write up some Cliff's Notes for ya =)

The Mindful Way through Depression- Williams, Teasdale, Segal & Kabat-Zinn

We tried some exercises during session but I'm the dumbest person alive when it comes to paying attention to how my hand feels?????

Oh well, maybe there's hope.

You're not dumb. There's a reason it's called practicing.

Peace is Every Step is the name of one of Thich Nhat Hanh's books that my T recommended to me. It's a great book!!

my T wants to teach me mindfulness starting next week but i think that when next week comes she will do nothing unless i bring it up and i'm not sure i want to do this of even if i can.i dont think you are dumb at all it is really hard.i know i'm really scared of it so i can imagine how you must feel

i want to learn mindfulness ................ sky you can teach and learn at the same time; and can you take it all with you while you are away?

You're not dumb. The point of mindfulness is not to notice how you feel perfectly--it's the process of attempting to notice it, over and over. The point is to be distracted and to do it imperfectly, and then to try again!

The easiest and quickest way for me to get completely into the moment I'm in is by listening to sounds. Right now I can hear crickets outside, my dishwasher, the ceiling fan, my fingers clicking on the keyboard. Somehow that just brings me to "Now" and brings me to a calmer place.

When I first learned to meditate, I started by focusing on sounds, and then on my breathing.

For me, mindfulness is being right here in the moment I'm in. Meditation is such good practice, but I find that even when I'm busy busy busy, if I pay attention, I can find this moment. Someone on PC once talked about finding the "thinnest sliver of now" and then the next one and the next one and staying right there. I really liked that.

I've done mindfulness exercises for about a year. I use them with the adolescent client that I work with during the school year . . . they often resist and buck them initially but once they really really try them, most student's love them. I know from my own attempts at mindfulness that I struggle, fight and shrug off the techniques initially. It takes me a long time to really SETTLE into the exercises. For example, one of the most simple mindfulness exercises is the "eating" exercise. I always think that I can DO this one without a blink of an eye. How hard can it be to eat a FREAKIN' rasin without going postal? I manage to make it more than it has to be. I always rush my eating and never pay attention to what the taste, texture or sound food makes for me. It takes me being sooooooo conscious and THERE to be mindful. Is it worth it? For me, YES! When I pay attention, I"m more conscious, aware and in tune to what is going on around me. Sometimes I can "tune out" but in the end, it always ends up biting me on the tushie. Good luck with the mindfulness. Please let us know how it goes for you!

I've found that the more I practice, the better I get. . . .hey, how come we are so self defeating and forget how much practice means to the overall outcome?

]I've done mindfulness exercises for about a year and a half. I use them with the adolescent client that I work with during the school year . . . they often resist and buck them initially but once they really really try them, most student's love them. I know from my own attempts at mindfulness that I struggle, fight and shrug off the techniques initially. It takes me a long time to really SETTLE into the exercises. For example, one of the most simple mindfulness exercises is the "eating" exercise. I always think that I can DO this one without a blink of an eye. How hard can it be to eat a FREAKIN' rasin without going postal? I manage to make it more than it has to be. I always rush my eating and never pay attention to what the taste, texture or sound food makes for me. It takes me being sooooooo conscious and THERE to be mindful. Is it worth it? For me, YES! When I pay attention, I"m more conscious, aware and in tune to what is going on around me. Sometimes I can "tune out" but in the end, it always ends up biting me on the tushie. Good luck with the mindfulness. Please let us know how it goes for you!

I've found that the more I practice, the better I get. . . .hey, how come we are so self defeating and forget how much practice means to the overall outcome?

You're not dumb! It just takes practice. It's okay not to know how your hand (or any other body part) feels at first, the important thing is to pay attention and notice that you feel "something." Maybe while you're out of town, you can take just 15 minutes either first thing in the morning, or right before bed and read a few pages in the book, or just find a single exercise that seems do-able to you, and practice that one each day. You could even find an exercise before you leave and write it out on an index card, then just bring the card with you...or read it out loud and record it then play it back each day. Then, you wouldn't even have to bring the book.

I love mindfulness exercises...when I'm feeling really disconnected, it's about the only thing that will ground me. I tend to start by just focusing on my breathing for a while, then, when I'm totally focused on my breathing, I start to let myself notice other things with each of my senses, and just notice each thing, not judging, just acknowledging it. It's HARD, especially when my emotions are super high. I've been super disconnected from the world around me for the last 3 weeks, and simply could not get grounded. My T suggested doing a mindfulness exercise together at the start of the last session, and 15 minutes later, I felt more grounded than I have in almost a month. By the end of the session, with mindfulness reminders from my T, I was almost fully connected again. I'm actually going to email my T and ask if we can do another exercise next session.

T and I also talked about 'focusing' which has some similarities. I asked if they dovetailed nicely and she said they do. So, I'll be reviewing and studying the focusing methods also. And having read so many books also about how the body holds so much valuable information and I now believe that, it's amazing how much resistance my mind still puts up towards this.

It's not that meditation is an alien concept for me but the kind of meditation I do does not focus on the exterior. So my mind is usually thinking or 'resting' or unconscious. I guess mindfulness just seems boring for some reason or another. But, I will give it the ol' college try. I am very attracted to the idea of the 'present moment' but I've approached it differently my whole life.

I hope I can make progress on this so T and I can move forward on my issues.

I've read a few of Thich Nhat Hanh's books along with many written by Pema Chodron. I really really like their approach to healing the mind.