my T has been gone out of the country for almost 6 months now (she originally hoped to be gone "just a few weeks" ) She is taking care of a sick relaitive. I miss her so much. Last week when she called she said she was looking at plane tickets to find a good price. But I haven't heard from her since then, except for something I saw she wrote online last night so that I know she is still out of the country. I miss her so much. I have DID and the inside kids are in so much pain, holding in all this trauma and crauddy stuff thats been going on while T has been gone... waiting a week inbetween sessions is tough... six months feels impossible!! Sometimes it feels like we're going to just SCREAM if she doesn't get home TODAY. I don't know when I will hear from her again, hopefully in another couple days (she tries to call once a week). But who knows when she will be home. We tried going to a substitutde therapist, and that didn't work out at all. Better to not go to anyone and just save my m oney. But We are just really aching and lonely today, we need our T so much. Its hard when our only communication with her is emails and the occassional phone call.

[healed84]

(((hugs)) to you.. I can't imagine what how hard that has got to be!! I hope she gets home soon!!

[lostmyway21]

Originally Posted by SarahMichelle

my T has been gone out of the country for almost 6 months now (she originally hoped to be gone "just a few weeks" ) She is taking care of a sick relaitive. I miss her so much. Last week when she called she said she was looking at plane tickets to find a good price. But I haven't heard from her since then, except for something I saw she wrote online last night so that I know she is still out of the country. I miss her so much. I have DID and the inside kids are in so much pain, holding in all this trauma and crauddy stuff thats been going on while T has been gone... waiting a week inbetween sessions is tough... six months feels impossible!! Sometimes it feels like we're going to just SCREAM if she doesn't get home TODAY. I don't know when I will hear from her again, hopefully in another couple days (she tries to call once a week). But who knows when she will be home. We tried going to a substitutde therapist, and that didn't work out at all. Better to not go to anyone and just save my m oney. But We are just really aching and lonely today, we need our T so much. Its hard when our only communication with her is emails and the occassional phone call.

I'm sorry your going through this. Six months is an extremely long time to wait. I can't even imagine going more than a few days. I hope she gets back soon.

[Wren_]

i think you've done so incredibly well, all of you, with your T gone ... and you did a great job of trying to see the substitute T, just sorry it didn't work out wow, that's great she is actually looking at tickets! hopefully that means she will be home soon which will be wonderful. How is her dog going?

[pbutton]

That is such a long time.

I'm glad I have her dog...he is just about the only cheerful thing we have at home. I send her pictures of him a lot and stories about him, he is a really funny dog. My dog who was my best friend died last fall, so it helps a little bit to have my T's dog here, to help me through that heartbreak some.
There is just such a huge need to talk to T. Sometimes it feels like we're going to burst.

[faith1983]

oh SarahMichelle!! You are more than wonderful! To go through all this time without t is impressive; I feel I wouldn't be able to do that. I'm also glad you can take care of t's dog. I'll pray for her to come home soon so you can finally have someone to talk to and maybe help the inside kids to feel less in pain!
I know it's not easy but I'm also sure you can keep holding on, as you already did so good

take care
faith

[Wren_]

i'm really glad you have t's dog there with you also ... i hope soon you'll be talking in person!

[laceylu]

You are so brave, I would have had to find another T. Is she coming back for sure?

[granite1]

you are being so strong and it must be so tiring and hard.how are you doing today??sending bunches of safe hugs

Thinking of you, SarahMichelle. You are doing so well under such difficult circumstances. So glad that having T's doggy helps

[CantExplain]

You go, girl!

I just miss her so much. I try all this stuff to try to make it not a big deal.... but it IS a big deal that she's gone.
She had said she hoped to get home in January. SURE.
I KNOW that a LOT of this is out of her control, because it all has to do with stuff going on in her family. But some of it IS in her control. I keep telling her, just get on a damn plane already!
I don't know... there is just going to be so much work to rebuild trust when she comes home.
It does help to know that she IS home sick and wants to come home. But geesh, why not just come home?

I'm sorry this is so tough for you and that T has been gone for so long.

Originally Posted by SarahMichelle

But geesh, why not just come home?

Sometimes things are out of our control, even for Ts. Yes she may want to come home, but family is family at the end of the day and she obviously feels that she cannot leave just yet. I'm sorry it's taking so long though

I know you didn't get on with the substitute T but isn't there another you could try? If you are struggling so much without her, then you really should be seeing someone else.

I hope T comes back soon, and that you can find someone suitable in the meantime

*Willow*

[googley]

(((((((((SarahMichelle))))))))))

I'm sorry your T is still gone. That must be so painful. I hope she returns home soon.

[Chopin99]

Sarah, you will be okay. You've shown tremendous strength through this ordeal. I don't know if I could handle my T being gone as long as she has. I agree with another poster; family is family. I would not respect a T who did not place their family first. So, while your T may very well want to come home, she might feel obligated to stay for the sake of her family member. I'm glad you have phone and email contact with her. Also, I'm sure her dog is a comfort.

Thank you. I will reply more later.

I haven't heard from her in a week, which worries me. You guys have seen how I get.
Some people on another website, where I posted for support, are telling me things like "maybe your T isn't coming back" and "maybe she's burned out, maybe she doesn't want to return" and "she's being unethical" "maybe she has some sort of mental problem going on" --etc..... how EXACTLY is that SUPPORTIVE? So I just absolutely will not talk about it there any longer.
T has a HOME and her family here, of course she will be back eventually. T and I talk often about how she's feeling too, so I do know that she isn't burnt out/etc, she hasn't got some secret mental illness
Its just hard, with her being gone.
Today is another one of those days when I am so desperate to talk to someone, someone who knows me.
There are a lot of bad dreams and flashbacks going on the past 3 days, and its just hard to deal with alone all the time.Plus my husband is in a bad mood. He is a T, but he isn't a very good listener at home.
so...yah. just sad around here.

[rainbow_rose]

...

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by SarahMichelle

T has a HOME and her family here, of course she will be back eventually.

To say nothing of the dog.

[bluemountains]

((((Sarah Michelle)))
I have been following your story for these six months and I am so sorry for your wait, but you have been inspiring to me because of your dedication and ability not to give up!
Big, bear hugs to you!
Bluemountains

One thing that I think is making it a bit tougher this week is that I've been having bad dreams again about my old T. We saw her for 7 years and she abruptly dumped us one night, out of NOWHERE--wasn't expecting it at ALL since things were going well, she just said "I'm done"--there was no closure at all...we still are not sure what we did wrong...she is still practicing at the same place but will not return calls/emails. So we still have dreams, trying to work all that out with her in our head, trying to talk to her inside, trying to say goodbye and find out what we did wrong, etc...

So I think that is making it harder, because we still miss her so much at times-it has been 4 years since we last saw her but can't seem to quite get over her. There was just no goodbye, no anything.

At any rate, my "new T" is SOOOOO much better than the old T, but its still a grieving process I guess.