[AnxiousGirl]

This has never happened. I'm not even sure what happened.

Had a session yesterday and we talked about my biggest fear in life (read last few threads). Also in my last few threads I wrote that I sent my T a long email about something that was going on and I needed help with because it was taking over my life. So we discussed that then there was a pause/silence. I wasn't looking at T so I lifted my head up and she was crying. Like not sobbing or anything but teary eyed/using tissues/sniffles. Then she said that she's sorry and it's her fault I feel this way, and it felt like my heart just dropped into my stomach. I said please dont say that (at this point I almost cried) and said it's mostly my fault for not doing the homework you assigned. Then we just agreed that it's both our faults. I have never seen this from my T (been going for a year). I'm not sure if it's because T didn't know how much I was hurting until I sent the email but she was a million times more sympathetic yesterday than any other session I've ever had. At one point I almost started to cry and that was the closest I've come to crying but I just looked away because I came home and cried for 5 hours straight. It was a weird session to be honest. At one point I was uncomfortable talking about something and asked if I could write it down and my T was so excited and said it was a good first step.

Ive never seen my T cry/ be so sympathetic in a session before like I did yesterday.

Anyone ever had a similar experience?

[musinglizzy]

Wow....how sweet! Just headed out the door for therapy myself, but when I get back I'm gonna check out your threads to get the story!

[Out There]

Quite a moment. Perhaps your T didn't quite understand how much you were hurting and how you felt. I hope you found it healing to cry.

[JaneTennison1]

What a breakthrough!!! I truly think now you are being honest she understands the problem and rather than just spend time trying to be the perfect client you can really work on changing/helping.

[AnxiousGirl]

Originally Posted by musinglizzy

Wow....how sweet! Just headed out the door for therapy myself, but when I get back I'm gonna check out your threads to get the story!

Sweet! Might be a long read though, but it would help you connect the dots Thanks for taking the time to check them out!

[AnxiousGirl]

Originally Posted by JaneTennison1

What a breakthrough!!! I truly think now you are being honest she understands the problem and rather than just spend time trying to be the perfect client you can really work on changing/helping.

I honestly never thought I would be so open with my T until the last few weeks of suffering. We made a plan to start working on this starting next weeks session, im excited/scared to start but who knows what will happen !

[AnxiousGirl]

Originally Posted by Out There

Quite a moment. Perhaps your T didn't quite understand how much you were hurting and how you felt. I hope you found it healing to cry.

Crying after the session was more of the fear coming back but I talked with my parents and everything, they all agree that its all in my head, rather than a physical illness. I was so shocked that my T was crying though. That was a first :P

[AnxiousGirl]

Also, T wanted me to do something in session (as en exposure) and I said no like 4 times. So then when I finished my session she actually emailed me towards the night asking if I had done it. I was asleep after the whole crying ordeal so I just emailed back saying no. Not sure what would happen now :P

I think some therapists really feel other people's emotions. (And other people too, not just therapists).

[AnxiousGirl]

Originally Posted by Brown Owl

I think some therapists really feel other people's emotions. (And other people too, not just therapists).

It didn't really bother me. I mean they're human too, it's hard to keep the emotions in when it's a sensitive topic.

[clairelisbeth]

That sounds like a really profound moment between you and your T. My pdoc has gotten teary with me a few times, when I was talking about really sensitive subjects. I felt very connected to her in those moments.

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[AnxiousGirl]

Originally Posted by clairelisbeth

That sounds like a really profound moment between you and your T. My pdoc has gotten teary with me a few times, when I was talking about really sensitive subjects. I felt very connected to her in those moments.

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It made me feel more "special" or "closer" to T. I dont know if thats a weird reaction or not but thats how I felt. Like now were on the same level and she cares enough to feel hurt too.

[Cinnamon_Stick]

I think its really special that your T was feeling the same emotions as you. What an amazing break through. I hope you can cry in session if you want to.

My T has shed a couple of tears a couple of times and it made me feel so much closer and connected to her. She said it was special that we shared the same emotion even if it was a bad one.

[AnxiousGirl]

Originally Posted by Cinnamon_Stick

I think its really special that your T was feeling the same emotions as you. What an amazing break through. I hope you can cry in session if you want to.

My T has shed a couple of tears a couple of times and it made me feel so much closer and connected to her. She said it was special that we shared the same emotion even if it was a bad one.

After last session, I sort of feel more safe if that makes any sense. Since I came so close to crying but stopped, then seeing T cry just made me feel as though I can cry in session without having to be afraid. I can almost guarantee I will shed some tears starting next session when we discuss these fears I have and I just hope my T can make me feel calm and everything.

[AnxiousGirl]

My T assigned homework as well about all of this and for the first time I feel brave enough to do it truthfully. It really feels good when you can trust T.

[Cinnamon_Stick]

Originally Posted by AnxiousGirl

After last session, I sort of feel more safe if that makes any sense. Since I came so close to crying but stopped, then seeing T cry just made me feel as though I can cry in session without having to be afraid. I can almost guarantee I will shed some tears starting next session when we discuss these fears I have and I just hope my T can make me feel calm and everything.

Trust me when I say that therapy is the best place to cry. I hate crying alone now. I was really scared to cry in therapy. Crying in-front of my T has been one of my biggest break threw when it comes to therapy. I am sure your T will make you feel calm and safe. It sounds like she is a really good T.

[AnxiousGirl]

Originally Posted by Cinnamon_Stick

Trust me when I say that therapy is the best place to cry. I hate crying alone now. I was really scared to cry in therapy. Crying in-front of my T has been one of my biggest break threw when it comes to therapy. I am sure your T will make you feel calm and safe. It sounds like she is a really good T.

She's a great T and always encourages me to cry when I have to/want to. Crying alone lately has actually been worse for me and when I cry alone I wish my T was there. I never thought I would ever be at this point in therapy. It's crazy.

[Cinnamon_Stick]

Originally Posted by AnxiousGirl

She's a great T and always encourages me to cry when I have to/want to. Crying alone lately has actually been worse for me and when I cry alone I wish my T was there. I never thought I would ever be at this point in therapy. It's crazy.

It sounds like you are on the right track. I know what you mean, I never thought in a million years I would actually want my T there when I cry so I can have her comfort. Its a huge break through and I hope you can experience it.

[AnxiousGirl]

Originally Posted by Cinnamon_Stick

It sounds like you are on the right track. I know what you mean, I never thought in a million years I would actually want my T there when I cry so I can have her comfort. Its a huge break through and I hope you can experience it.

Thanks It is definitely a huge breakthrough and I'm glad it happened.

[stopdog]

I am not sure I would notice if the therapist cried but I would not be pleased. I am not crying about anything - I have no idea what the woman would have to cry about.
But if you didn't mind it, then I am glad.

[AnxiousGirl]

Originally Posted by stopdog

I am not sure I would notice if the therapist cried but I would not be pleased. I am not crying about anything - I have no idea what the woman would have to cry about.
But if you didn't mind it, then I am glad.

I think it made me feel closer in a way. Like wow my T really understands my fears/struggles. I cry about that topic 24/7 just have a hard time crying in front of T.

[Shaly78]

Was she crying for you or for herself? Is she a survivor, that could be why she was probably crying for herself. I would ask make sure. You will be in those shoes later on once you stop being numb, if u are.

[AnxiousGirl]

Originally Posted by Shaly78

Was she crying for you or for herself? Is she a survivor, that could be why she was probably crying for herself. I would ask make sure. You will be in those shoes later on once you stop being numb, if u are.

She started crying after saying she felt at fault for how I was feeling. Also after saying she hates seeing me worry and suffer this way. I think it was more sympathy.

[BudFox]

I had a few of these moments with ex T. The first one was a watershed (pun intended) moment and nothing was the same after that. It signaled a level of attunement that was previously unknown to me, at least from somebody in a caretaking role. Things later got painful and destructive, and I now look back at the moment as the start of a treacherous emotional enmeshment. But it felt powerfully good at the time.

[AnxiousGirl]

Originally Posted by BudFox

I had a few of these moments with ex T. The first one was a watershed (pun intended) moment and nothing was the same after that. It signaled a level of attunement that was previously unknown to me, at least from somebody in a caretaking role. Things later got painful and destructive, and I now look back at the moment as the start of a treacherous emotional enmeshment. But it felt powerfully good at the time.

I feel the good part only. Although I have talked to a few people about it and they're half and half about it. Some say that it means my T and I are really close and others say it wasn't right.

I dont see why it wasnt right or anything. Any idea?