[Miswimmy1]

Curious to see what others have to say...

[BlessedRhiannon]

I felt a connection with her right away, and knew that I could work with her. But...to really trust her, especially with the hard stuff...about a year and a half, maybe two years. And it took me 3 years to trust her enough to take her recommendation about talking to a p-doc.

I trusted her after 2 years of weekly sessions.

It really was very immediate for me. I knew when I left his office after this first session that this was a therapist who "got" me right away.

[BashfulBear]

I chose 'other' because it's complicated.

We've actually been having discussions about trust in the past couple of sessions. I like her a lot, and I trust her on a very superficial level (i.e. I trust her to be at our appointment if she says she will be, I trust her to let me know if she can't make it, etc.), but my trust doesn't extend any deeper yet. I'm just not a trusting person. I stated that I wouldn't trust her to catch me if we were paired together for the trust exercise (where one person falls back and the other person catches them), and she said 'so you can't trust me to catch me if you fall'. That pretty much sums it up, I think - I'm scared of taking the risk - I've been burned badly once too many times by health professionals. I'll get there at some point though, I'm just not sure when exactly.

[QuietCat]

Seriously, it took about 18 months of weekly sessions for me to trust him. And I would say I've only recently started to totally trust that he's safe.

[AngelWolf3]

My situation is interesting, I first started with her about 11 years ago. I TOTALLY did NOT trust her AT ALL then. I was with her weekly for 2 years and then stopped seeing her. Now, years later, I found her again, and after re-connecting with her since June, I am starting to trust her bit by bit. I guess I should have picked "other!"

I have been seeing him for almost a year, 2 times a week and I'm still not totally there.

[critterlady]

I trusted him with some stuff right away. After almost a year of mostly twice weekly sessions, there are still some things I don't trust him with.

[LoneWolfie]

That is a tough question to answer. I have been seeing my Pdoc every week since the end of February. I can't say how much I trust her as I have difficulty with recognizing emotions and feelings.

I'm still trying to get comfortable with her in sessions, I know she cares for my well being and likes working with me as she has told me so on many occasions.

Yet I have also seen her get slightly angry with my behavior and she has made it known so part of me is scared of her. Apparently I haven't seen her get very angry according to my act worker who sits in on my sessions.

Can there be trust when there is fear? I know that I have been honest with her about everything which comes in the form of my writing a few times a week and sending her a copy of it.

So the question you asked I can't really answer since I think I trust her but am not really sure.

I felt a connection with her right away and I would have said I trusted her... but I was holding back, more than I even realised. It seems there are levels of trust! I finally started really opening up after around 9 months of weekly sessions. We were doing great until a couple months or so ago, when things started getting 'rocky' between us. We've been trying to work it out, but I keep involuntarily shutting down, clamming up.. it's like I go into my 'hurt child' and it doesn't feel 'safe'... I guess trust can be somewhat lost in some circumstances and takes time to rebuild again, even if the will is consciously there to be open and honest. My T is apparently stunned that after 18 months, and having a good therapeutic relationship with her, I have been having such difficulties talking to her lately.

[sunrise]

I chose "other." For me trust wasn't an all or nothing thing so that I could choose yes before 10 weeks I didn't have it and after 10 weeks I did. It built gradually for me, as I got to know him, and him me. I connected with him immediately, though. Just "click" from day 1. I did share something with him very important to me quite early on, and I look back now and think that this may have been a kind of test to see if he was trustworthy. He did fine on "the test" and this helped us continue developing trust. I also had dreams about him very early on as my subconscious was grappling with the relationship.

[Syra]

It depends what you mean by "trust." In some ways, I trust no one. I know that anyone can betray anyone.

I was betrayed by my previous therapist - who I left because of that betrayal (although more because of all the dynamics that led up to the betrayal) - but my position that no one is completely trustworthy predates her - and I was shocked that she betrayed me, as I totally trusted her in action.

Despite the fact that I believe no one is totally trushworthy (not even me, not even for myself), I choose to trust, or to act as if I trust, and then trust that if my trust is betrayed, I will be able to handle it, because the alternative of trusting no one seems to me a much worse life than trusting judiciously, knowing I will be betrayed at some point.

Do I trust? I don't think so. Not really.
Do I act as if I trust some people? yes. And I am better for it.

Did I act as if I trusted my current therapist immediately? Hmmm. probably pretty much, although the trust has grown from substantive topics to the process. I also did a lot of research and interviewing so had some information about him, and about our rapport, before I first saw him.

Or perhaps I am parsing words.

[harvest moon]

I chose other. I've been with him 3 years and of course I trust him more and more. Never trusted anyone in my life, so I'm not yet there.. I don't completely trust him, but I'm taking one step at a time. But still, I watch and analyze his every move/word and interpret everything in a negative way, as if he will abandon me or he will get tired of me not progressing enough... It's tough!

[sconnie892]

I trusted my t at various levels from the start. As my trust grew, so did my ability to disclose.

[Nightlight]

Such a hard question because I don't see it as being as black and white as either don't trust/do trust. I trusted my T quite a lot as soon as I met her. I liked her more than I liked most people and did feel safe with her. There were still things I didn't trust (I thought she was going to get sick of me and give up on me). Even now there are some things like that. Sometimes when she says she'll do something and then she doesn't, I can't trust that she had the best intentions, and I feel like it's all about me. Mostly though, I did trust her as soon as I first met her. There are just a few things I get caught up on.

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by Miswimmy1

Curious to see what others have to say...

It's interesting that you thought 15 sessions would be close to the upper limit, but that turns out not to be the case.

[Sunne]

As soon as I sat down in his office and started talking to him I felt he is someone I would be able to trust. He was playful, humorous, and seemed very skilled.
It's been 7 months now and while I do trust him a great deal, I still do not trust him completely. I'm not sure I ever have trusted anyone completely.
I do trust him more than I've ever trusted anyone and he shows me consistently that he is the proper therapist for me and that he is there for me and cares for me a great deal.

[pbutton]

I liked him at my first appointment. I hold back as such a matter of habit that I don't think I quite grasp what "trust" is yet.

[bastetsha]

It took around 15 sessions for me to trust my first T. A little less my second T because he reminded me so much of my best friend. Still, I do get a nagging voice sometimes in my head that tells me he is untrustworthy but I tell that voice to shut up most of the time.

[Victoria'smom]

I do trust her, it was a long slow, painful (on her part) process that took 1 1/2. I still worry I scare her.

I liked him the first session. My trust in him grew as therapy progressed, through obvious levels like trusting that he wouldn't physically attack me during session, then that he wouldn't laugh at me or humiliate me, then that he would be there for me, etc etc etc. But real "trust" probably took about 6 months of weekly sessions.

[retro_chic]

I have been working with my current T for a year now and while I trust her more than anyone else in my life, I still don't completely trust her yet.

I connected with her immediately, I think the connection started even during the initial phone consultation before we met in person. I already knew I trusted her by the 2nd appointment.

[scorpiosis37]

I did not have an immediate connection with my T. I remember being a little disappointed after our first session and, after about a month, I considered either stopping therapy or looking for a new therapist. Honestly, the only reason I didn't is because I was too busy to call around and look for a new therapist. I can't remember any specific turning point but, after a few months, I began feeling a connection with my T. It was very gradual, but her care and consistency showed trough and I began feeling like she understood me. I would say it took about 9 months for me to feel totally won over and to trust her completely. Now, after 2 1/2 years, I think my T is absolutely incredible and the perfect fit for me. I referred her to a friend of mine as well, and we now frequently begin conversations with "I just saw T! I love her! She's magical; she makes everything okay!" I love my T and am so so so happy I was too busy early on to follow through with looking for a different T!