Couch 48 - All are Welcome - really!

Yup I'm here

I'm finally here too.
MUE - I am with you on late dinner. Just finished my pasta with tomato and cheese.

I have t tomorrow... and I am so ready to be in t's office and not at work. T's office is safe. Work not so much.

Hey yall Im making out with a PB&J

Sounds like fun. What kind of J?

Just got home from the fundraiser... I am exhausted...full day of 16 crazy Kindergardeners tomorrow do, I should get to bed! (((( hugs)))) to everyone who needs them!

How do you "make out" with a PB&J? Sounds....err....messy? LOL

Ha! I was just thinking the same thing!

I probably was making out with my black bean burger, just didn't realize it. Dang, now I feel like I missed out on something exciting....it's been a long time...bahahaha

Ike I worked with an elvis impersonator who scheduled bookings from his desk. That wasn't annoying at all.

I got some sicilian orange marmalade from the health food store that'll make you moan.

OK, so I had the black bean burger....and now I'm still kinda hungry. Actually, I'm in the mood for some cookies n cream ice cream topped with crushed oreos and marshmallows....Is that bad? I really didn't need to ask that question. I know it's bad. I'll just imagine myself eating it.

Grape is there anything else?

Ugh. I tried on eyeglasses today. I thought I found a really cute pair, then I remembered t said to take a picture. While I'm figuring it out, the store people are trying to get me to try other specs. I finally take the pics and I'm like - this is nothing like what I thought i was seeing!!

So mue - I'll be doing more mirror work with you. My t says he's never met a mirror he didn't like. He doesn't sound too vain!

I'm gonna start a dating service based on just this one question!

I've been holding on my reaction to the mirror for almost a week....and it sux....

He probably has no idea how much it affected me, and I know it's my responsibility to tell him. When he held the mirror up to me, I told him I didn't want to look at myself. He kept stressing for me to look at my posture. I did, briefly, and then looked away. When he asked me again, "do you see it?"....I said, "Ooh, nice necklace!"....

I didn't even want to go to group T today because of it....but the rational part of me is saying that everyone has SEEN me for...like...ever. And just because I'm now super aware of it doesn't mean that it's anything new for others.

I can't believe people actually accept having ME in a room with them....

I kinda like strawberry jelly.....but with cream cheese, not PB....

I even made a joke about it in the shower today....I said that I'm so repulsive that the only thing that wants to get close to me is the damn shower curtain....LOL

Apricot or blackberry preserves.

Granite - I am glad it went okay.

I like blackberry as well. Not a fan of grape jelly.

I did not think anyone over the age of 5 was a fan of grape jelly. But I do love peanut butter.

I made a mistake and let the woman talk today. When she did, it was like she had not heard anything I said for 45 minutes. I always have some hope that she will say something that lets me know she has heard me. I am always bitterly disappointed. I have got to kill the hope. I cancelled for next week after this one being such a waste. Apparently, I need to figure out a way to communicate more clearly. And to slaughter the hope.

After I cancelled, I had a large scotch.
I may have another one after this second one I am having now (but, couchiers -note the order - I cancelled THEN I drank - no drinking before). I also may get stoned. I am hoping to sleep tonight - I have not slept well in the past couple of weeks. Actually since the last break. She will be gone the week after I cancelled so it will be two weeks at least before I try again. Surely I can figure out someway to communicate what I am trying to do in two weeks.

Ike - I am glad you are enjoying gospel hour. It is very funny.

ok it's still National Poetry Month (today is the last day!) So here is my:

Ode to Therapy

Twas the night before T
and all around the house
the client was pacing
(certainly not like a mouse!)

Her notebook was ready
with dreams all recorded
and thoughts of the meanings
(or so she purported)

But sleep was elusive
it just wouldn't claim her
so up again, up again
(as each verse grows lamer)

Dishes and dirty clothes?
Those helped for awhile
Her house is now gleaming
But she has not one smile.

And she wishes for clutter
She can SEE instead of feel
"It's better to look good..."
is how she learned to deal.

But nice on the outside eventually fades
and you have to find something behind the facade.

Grape jelly.

This is the funniest thing I've seen recently. Hope everyone gets a laugh out of it.

I like beach plum jam. Tart, sweet, terrific on zeek toast. I make it, or used to make it, I have no beach plum bushes at my new place.

Therapy and scotch. They go together well. I am sure it's not you who isn't communicating well. Sometimes I think they like the sound of their own voice.

MUE - the mirror thing is horrid. Just horrid. I honestly wouldn't stand for it. At my daughter's interview yesterday there were mirrors on a far away wall, and I was loosing it. I have BDD, and I was seeing this ginormous neck sticking out farther than my face, and my one boob that is a zillion times bigger than the other. I kept pulling my sweater around me and tilting my head down...it was awful. My daughter says "don't look"...but hell if I can stop looking. I do the same thing when I see my reflection in a grocery store door, or at the mall, etc.

I absolutely loved the poem, especially these last lines.

Welk calls it a "modern spiritual".... ha ha ha ha. No Elvis' hips, but you can sing about reefer!