Couch 55...And on it goes....

BonnieJean · Jun 30, 2013, 05:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by healed84

I felt something today..

We got to church this morning, dropped the kids off at kid's church and went and had a seat in the sanctuary. We are still rather new to this church, and have yet to make any close connections with anybody. Still, people come to us on and off say hi, how are we doing, shoot the breeze for a couple of moments. During this time, I just commented to my h that I miss having people to talk to. The people at my old church I have known (most of them anyways) since I was 12 years old, and the rest of them for about 7 years. All of a sudden this emmence feeling of lonliness came over me. I cried (something I have been trying to do for months now) just about the whole church service.

The fact is, even if we were still at our old church, I had withdrawn a lot from my friends there. I have done the same with my h and other close family members. I put walls up, I don't let people in anymore. T and I were just talking about this on Friday.. We were talking about the roots of when I started doing this and how lonely I must have felt as a 10 or 11 year old feeling like b/c of things that had happened to me in my short life has caused me to using these coping mechanisms. I have been telling me t for a while now, I just want to feel something. I did today.. its not a great feeling, but I know there are things that I need to change to let those people in that meet the criteria for being trustworthy in my life.

Anyways, just wanted to share.

Thanks for sharing, Healed. I can relate to quite a bit of it! I wonder if your talk with t Friday is what primed you for this experience in the new church today.

jkbob · Jun 30, 2013, 07:09 PM

Just cause I don't want to start a new thread I'm posting this here.

I left PC for a while because my life was falling apart and I couldn't handle hearing what a bad person/mother many people on here thought I was because I wanted to be supportive of H and our marriage.

He has been arrested. He is not allowed to have contact w/ me except email to coordinate childcare. He still blames me for everything is extremely angry. At times he says wants to come home and just wants all of this to be over.

I am sad. I want my family back together and I want to work this out. I want H to be a better husband and father. I regret calling the cops because I honestly believe this will be the end of "us" Regardless of what everyone else on here thinks, I want to be a family and our kids deserve to have both parents at home. No one deserves to be hit, but we all make mistakes.

Jun 30, 2013, 07:38 PM

Hi everyone. A new couch! That's what I get for being away i suppose. Anyway have had a tough couple of weeks with dreams about my T, some nice, others I wake up and don't want to go back to sleep in case i have more of them. I can only vaguely remember them but they are scary. I have had more dreams about my T in the past 2 weeks than I have had in the past 3 years. Does this mean anything?

granite1 · Jun 30, 2013, 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bipolarartist

Hi everyone. A new couch! That's what I get for being away i suppose. Anyway have had a tough couple of weeks with dreams about my T, some nice, others I wake up and don't want to go back to sleep in case i have more of them. I can only vaguely remember them but they are scary. I have had more dreams about my T in the past 2 weeks than I have had in the past 3 years. Does this mean anything?

were they bad dreams . i have had like 2 dreams with my T in them and they were not to bad or at least she was not bad . she was always trying to help me in them.

Jun 30, 2013, 08:36 PM

Yes, granite he was the threat in my dream, this hasn't happened in the dreams previuos to this fortnight,

CantExplain · Jun 30, 2013, 09:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jkbob

Just cause I don't want to start a new thread I'm posting this here.

Welcome, Bob!

You were, and are, in an impossible situation. You had to make a difficult choice. Alas, there is no escape and whatever you do, someone will get hurt.

((Bob))

stopdog · Jun 30, 2013, 09:45 PM

jkbob - I hope things calm down for you soon.

10:27 PM

well it is only 11pm here and I'm back from the trip to the Laundromat. No late night runs this week. Yeah!!! I'm getting better at getting it all done. It would go faster if I would wash and dry there but I don't want to waste the extra money washing there... since only the dryer is broke.

I can't believe its July already. These next 2 weeks are busy for me at work.

Also, I got myself involved with helping out an acquaintance and it involves babysitting her two boys so she can have visitation with her other son...the kids can't be together or even see each other... so tomorrow I wait a phone call from child services to confirm that I will have the kids during her visitation. one of her son's is only 2. I haven't taken care of a 2 year old in six years... I hope I have the energy... I just know my house isn't 2 year old proof any longer so I have to go collecting marker and pens to put them away and cover all of my electrical sockets again... luckily I still have the locks on my cleaning supply cabinets... and I have to put medicine away...what have a got myself into...

ETA: I know its ridiculous but I'm one of those people who hit their brakes when they see a cop even though I'm going the speed limit so ....I'm a little paranoid to have to be dealing with Division of Youth and Family Services even though its just to confirm I'm babysitting during on a specific date and time.

Jun 30, 2013, 10:29 PM

I'm off to bed... trying not to have any "late" nights this week... trying to keep this residual headache from coming back as a full migraine.

Raging Quiet · Jul 01, 2013, 03:36 AM

Changing the subject slightly - my T told my friend that therapists often cough when something comes up in the room - maybe something for the therapist of a breakthrough for the client. Has anyone experienced this with their T's?

CantExplain · Jul 01, 2013, 03:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rect0pathic

Changing the subject slightly - my T told my friend that therapists often cough when something comes up in the room - maybe something for the therapist of a breakthrough for the client. Has anyone experienced this with their T's?

Um.... no.

Jul 01, 2013, 03:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rect0pathic

Changing the subject slightly - my T told my friend that therapists often cough when something comes up in the room - maybe something for the therapist of a breakthrough for the client. Has anyone experienced this with their T's?

No, I've never heard my T cough, except when he had a cold. Nor can I remember exT coughing (but I never had a breakthrough with her, so who knows

)

Jul 01, 2013, 05:58 AM

No bunnies were harmed in the making of this post.

WikidPissah · Jul 01, 2013, 06:08 AM

Yay for healthy bunnies!

Ready...it's called "speeder's reflex" (when you step on the brake when you see a cop). I don't have it because I always do the speed limit...it's a stupid compulsive fear of mine. Don't go crazy child proofing, you'll only have him a few hours right? Just keep a watchful eye. And enjoy it! There is nothing like little hands and feet.

The baby is hanging in there...she's fighting. Her little heartbeat has even gotten better. So there's a glimmer of hope this morning.

WikidPissah · Jul 01, 2013, 06:14 AM

jkbob...I understand that it must feel horrible to have your children's father in jail. I really hope that you can find a silver lining, and perhaps even enjoy this time of safety for yourself. You deserve peace, those children deserve a little peace too.

WikidPissah · Jul 01, 2013, 07:06 AM

stupid gd effin chest pains...AGAIN! Grrrr. I hates this sh it.

granite1 · Jul 01, 2013, 07:40 AM

happy dance for me today so far.i tested my sugar thismorning and it was 185 .wow that is so good for me it has been a long time sence it has been under 200. usually it is over 300 or even over 400. i think that is awsome .go me

not that i am tooting my own horn or anything. just saying

Jul 01, 2013, 07:51 AM

Good for you, Granite! So happy for you!

Jul 01, 2013, 07:52 AM

Granite.... that is really good... hope you've been keeping a food journal or can go back and remember what you've been eating so you can do that again!!!!

Its so hard not to get discouraged because so many things impact blood sugars besides food like illness and hormones, etc...

So its definitely great to celebrate when all your good eating pays off with good numbers!!!

WikidPissah · Jul 01, 2013, 07:54 AM

Seriously Chickie...that's awesome! GO YOU!

Morning MKAC and Ready

Jul 01, 2013, 07:57 AM

Hope everyone has a good day... I have a lot to do today at work so I'm signing off for a while. Maybe I'll come back at lunch to catch up on the morning happenings.

Jul 01, 2013, 07:57 AM

Do I get Wiki points this morning? Eating breakfast AND it's pretty healthy -- Shredded Wheat. Had eggs for breakfast both days over the weekend. Trying to get into the habit of eating in the morning is hard for me.

Jul 01, 2013, 07:58 AM

Yeah, I need to go get ready for work. Haven't done that yet. Have a good day at work, Ready.

granite1 · Jul 01, 2013, 08:01 AM

OK if MCAK gets wiki points for breakfast i want some for my sugar levels (sibling rivalry at its best )lol
seriously dont ya just hate people like me who just have to have what others have lol

love ya MKAC

Jul 01, 2013, 08:06 AM

I freely acknowledge that you deserve WAY more Wiki points than I do! I'm so proud of you. Big hugs, cyber-sis.

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