[neutrino]

I've read quite a lot of threads in this forum and I've noticed a lot of you speak fondly of your therapists. I've read about how some of you have therapists who react very well and very kindly when you're having a hard time and when you're having meltdowns (or whatever you're supposed to call them) etc.

What kind of therapy are you in?

I'm very new to the whole concept of therapy as I've only seen my therapist for three weeks. He's a psychologist and a psychotherapist who's focusing on cognitive behavioural therapy. I'm still trying to figure him out and I'm still trying to figure out what the rules are. How does CBT really work? I'm very well aware it's based on exposures and changing the way you think. What I'm wondering, though, is whether it's ok to just talk about things and trying to understand why I function the way I do? Can I, in theory, talk about anything with my therapist or am I only supposed to tell him things and then work on getting over my fears?

I want to be understood and I want to be able to function.

[BlessedRhiannon]

Originally Posted by neutrino

How does CBT really work? I'm very well aware it's based on exposures and changing the way you think. What I'm wondering, though, is whether it's ok to just talk about things and trying to understand why I function the way I do? Can I, in theory, talk about anything with my therapist or am I only supposed to tell him things and then work on getting over my fears?

I want to be understood and I want to be able to function.

CBT is typically more about skill building and dealing with the present rather than digging deeper and looking at your past and understanding why you do things. It sounds like what you're looking for is a more psychodynamic treatment. I'd say, talk to your therapist - ask him the questions you've asked here, and see what he has to say. I only have enough understanding of CBT to know that it's not the kind of treatment I would find beneficial.

My T is a licensed psychologist. She uses some elements of DBT as needed, but mostly uses a relational-cultural philosophy. With my T, it's all about learning how to build a trusting relationship, how to be authentic, and then how to carry that from the therapy setting in to the rest of my life.

[BonnieJean]

What you're describing as what you want sounds more like psycho-dynamic therapy. That's the type of therapy I'm in with a psychologist/psychotherapist. CBT is not for me.

CBT doesn't work for me either. I do psychodynamic therapy with my newest T (I have 2), but since his disclosures (all appropriate) help me so much (never had one who ever shared any self-experience before; it's amazing how much it helps me), he said there is also a relational component to it as well.

I would ask your therapist how he works with CBT and his patients and what to expect, and see if this works for you in theory. You might not know yet, so you might try it and see...or you might know right away you want something different, and in that case, a psychodynamic T might work really well for you.

[0w6c379]

I have no idea.

I am doing Trauma and I am hating it right now, My T is a clinical Psychologist.

[MoxieDoxie]

CBT also failed me. So he changed it to client focused therapy even though he says EVERYTHING, even EMDR, is CBT. I also see another T who does IFS/EMDR(have not done that in 2 months). They both list themselves as life coaches as well. I think they chose what style to use with me that day depending on what mood/part that walks in the door.

[tinyrabbit]

My T is an integrative relational body psychotherapist. Which means he combines elements of different approaches; he believes the relationship that occurs between client and therapist is key to the therapy; and the body part is about awareness of the links between body and mind, trauma being stored in the body, etc.

The relational part is really important to me. It's about the therapist bringing themself to the process which I don't think is part of CBT. I don't know how CBT works or if you can tell your T anything but that's something to ask. Personally I knew I didn't want CBT as I needed something deeper and more long-term.

[healed84]

My t is a Psy.D and is a psychodynamic t.. We use talk therapy as our mode of therapy.. But pulls different types of therapies in as needed. That is what you may need, a mixture of different styles.

[Raging Quiet]

I've heard great things about CBT; in the UK, a lot of traditional counsellors at doctors surgeries (NHS) were replaced by IAPT as CBT therapists as studies here show for present day issues and anxiety, depression and phobias, that CBT had a strong outcome measure in less sessions.

Personally though, I'm in psychodynamic and integrative body psychotherapy; although I don't really know how to explain it; it's a mixture of gestalt and human centred I think.

My T is CBT, and very much brings himself to the relationship and tells me things about himself where it's appropriate. We focused on skills almost exclusively in the beginning to get my symptoms under control. Once I was functioning better, the therapy progressed. We discuss the relationship some, and we talk about the past and how it relates to my reactions now, and how to try to correct my interpretations of event and learn skills to control my reactions.

You mean there are different kinds ... ?!?!?

My T is pretty eclectic but with a strong CBT/REBT bent. The CBT aspect has been very effective in overcoming all the old tapes that ran through my head my whole life as the result of early child sexual abuse. We definitely explore my history as a means to understanding where those old mistaken beliefs came from, how they served me throughout my life (usually badly), and how they still effect me today. CBT has given me the ability to finally let those old messages go and rebuild my self-confidence, to take control back over my thought processes, and move forward in a much more healthy manner.

Despite what some experience with CBT as a short-term, surface level therapy, that absolutely not been my experience with CBT at all. My deepest, most effective work has resulted with CBT always running in the background.

My T and I are strongly connected and he has been highly supportive and personal

[stopdog]

The two I see advertise themselves as psychodynamic/eclectic.

I have not found cbt to be useful for me.

[Asiablue]

The annoying kind.

Originally Posted by Asiablue

The annoying kind.

Hee,hee

[Marsdotter]

My current and last therapist simply advertised themselves as "eclectic". I filled in the blanks by getting to know them and asking questions relevant to my own needs. Establishing trust and relationship has taken precedence over any particular modalities in my case for sure. But I've heard lots of people say that CBT was/is helpful to them.

[neutrino]

Thanks for all the replies.

I'm not sure what I need. I'm really not sure of much nowadays. I know that I need to work on facing my fears or I might fail university since group discussions and presentations etc scare the hell out of me to say the least. It actually makes me so anxious I even go "mute" sometimes. What I want more than anything though is for someone to understand and make sense of things. I need someone to really listen to me and help me. I need something long-term. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if I needed to be in therapy for years. I'm very worried CBT won't work out.

Sorry for complaining and for asking so many questions (see, I worry you'll think I'm annoying too). This is all still very confusing to me.

[feralkittymom]

I was in psychodynamic therapy, but I didn't have specific fears/phobias to deal with.

You may get the quickest relief from the phobia behaviors with CBT. But once your symptoms are better controlled, you may want to explore the origins/connections between your experiences, feelings, and present behaviors with the same T or a new one using a different modality.

NOT the kind that just made me quit.

I prefer psychodynamic and the focus on exploring the unconscious.

No offense to those who love CBT/DBT/skills whatever... but I think it removes the human element and makes everything technical... like learning ABCs or Math. I hate it.
I like to know and UNDERSTAND why I do the things I do, and explore the patterns in my life.

[neutrino]

Originally Posted by Tollhouse

NOT the kind that just made me quit.

I prefer psychodynamic and the focus on exploring the unconscious.

No offense to those who love CBT/DBT/skills whatever... but I think it removes the human element and makes everything technical... like learning ABCs or Math. I hate it.
I like to know and UNDERSTAND why I do the things I do, and explore the patterns in my life.

Do you learn any coping mechanism in psychodynamic therapy? I mean, what in psychodynamic therapy is it that actually helps with the anxiety and the depression? The talking itself?

[feralkittymom]

Originally Posted by neutrino

Do you learn any coping mechanism in psychodynamic therapy? I mean, what in psychodynamic therapy is it that actually helps with the anxiety and the depression? The talking itself?

My T mixed in aspects of cognitive therapy to help encourage functional behaviors during my depression, but within the context of psychodynamic therapy to explore and repair through empathy the underlying causes of my lifelong depression. But he never used worksheets and that sort of thing--just cognitive principles.

[kirby777]

Hi-
Not the type I want...I am guessing she is CBT based...But it is not helping me w/ my anxiety, PTSD, nor depression...I get homework!

I hope you find what you are looking for!

Trauma therapy for DID and ptsd

[Syra]

I have found that the Ts way of being is more important than their orientation. I've had a judgmental CBT, and a really open and supportive CBT that was very helpful. I love IFS, but I've seen it contribute to the most open, non-defensive, supportive relationship, and in a very judgmental and defensive way (that person didn't make it past the first interview). I've had person-centered (allegedly) that was judgmental and blaming, but that is totally counter to what PCA is supposed to be about. I've had art therapy, which I loved, but hte T was a little (as in a tad too much, but in many ways very good) controlling. I suspect Ts have as much trouble with their blind spots as the rest of us.

I think if I was searching, the two most important things are

1. are they currently in therapy (perhaps peer therapy to keep them fresh, not necessarily long-term, intense therapy if they've been doing their work for many years)

2. do they have regular and sufficient supervision. Even good therapists sometimes need someone to help them figure things out.