T gave me an ultimatum

I really feel overwhelmed right now. Today my t told me that if I did not get into some other sort of treatment (outpatient or residential) he would no longer be able to see me. I know that I have been sliding back lately, but I don't know what I will do if the only type of support I have in my life is taken away. Even though the idea scares me, it is not that I am even against treatment. My problem with it is lack of money and my job. He doesn't seem to understand that I have no means to make this happen. Even with sliding scales it will cost thousands. I am living day to day as it is. I am really scared of what is going to happen.

Maybe he can help you find something.

It seems to me that you appear to be in a catch 22 situation. Why don't you show this thread to your T. S/He needs to know that you are not anti, its just you have no cash.

As painful as it is to change T's, have you considered it? I don't like the ultimatum. I've been in a very bad place and my T hasn't made that requirement of me. He's said he's come close to having me taken inpatient and he always tries to use that as an utter last resort.

Any T willing to give an ultimatum isn't worth your time. ***personal experience*** just trust me. Find a new T and move on.

Thanks all for being so wonderful.

~~delusionsdaily~~

My med regime:
AM:
500mg Depakote ER
150mg Seroquel
PM:
1,000mg Depakote ER
150mg Seroquel

My t did the same

It made me evaluate my life and behaviour and started my recovery stage. (After a lot of processing and panicking as I didn't want anything in my medical records)

Therapists have a responsibility and psychotherapy alone just doesn't cut it in some cases. As long as it was all stated respectfully, I think it was a reasonable request on the part of your therapist. On the other hand, I understand how not having money makes this situation so difficult for you. Could you perhaps discuss with your therapist ways you might have to get some sort of treatment for free or pay less? Are there any options available where you live, which would suit you? Have you told your therapist about your situation? I hope you will find a solution. Sorry you're going through so much.

I would not tolerate a therapist who gave me ultimatums. I would quit. Not saying anyone else should, just that I would. They do not get to demand I do or not do something or try to manipulate me into compliance by threatening to withdraw.

I go back and forth about how I would feel in your situation. I have been in some really tough spots, but not once has a T threatened to take away support when I clearly had too little. The reality of life is that we can't always afford the healthcare we need. I don't think there should be a punishment for it. If you are up for it, I would try to find another T who is willing to help you find other ways to manage things. Even if you could find a sliding-scale program that was willing to bill, I doubt they would be worth it in terms of treatment quality. Short of needing emergency inpatient treatment, I can't see the benefit of threatening this. If it's a hollow threat to kind of "scare" you into balance, it's a pretty ****** move.
I can understand the liability he may be facing if he continues to see you decompensate and does nothing, but I also believe strongly that a person has the right to choose their own care. I don't think there should ever be a time when anyone is forced into treatment they don't want (and yes, in my belief that also includes suicidal patients). That's not to say I won't try to talk anyone out of ending their own life, but ultimately, I think it's up to that person... (if you were to involve others, then I would object, but if you are only physically impacting your own continued existence, it's all up to you). But I digress...
I think if you are worried about T's ultimatum, it's time to look elsewhere. If he refuses to see how this is not financially feasable for you, then he's probably missing other things too...
Good luck with it all.

Your T may have set some boundaries for himself that inspired this ultimatum. If he knows he's unable to work with you unless you get additional support, that may say more about his own limits than yours. Sometimes it's just not the right fit for the T to work with a certain individual at a certain time. And again. that says nothing about you if that's the case.

I did intensive outpatient CBT. It was very expensive, and I was poor, but the hospital set a payment plan for me. Although it took a few years to pay off, in the end it was worth it.

Trdleblue , was thinking of you and wondering how you are doing? Haven't seen you post much since this thread? Sending positive thoughts your way... Let us know how you are doing.

Me too actually. Read your post and I think I have at least an idea of how you feel. It sucks when you get an ultimatum. It feels as if you don't have the freedom to decide for yourself anymore. Luckily I also noticed that you're not against another kind of treatment. But then you're faced with this money problem. Although I think it's after all still better than in case you wouldn't want any other treatment and that would cause you to lose your T too.
Even though a solution may not be present at this very own moment, I'm sure that if you explain this to your T and mention that you understand the importance of this ultimatum, you'll find a way out of there.

Please let us know how you're doing.

This only goes to show how messed up our MH system is. Unfortunately at the end of the day, saving our lives physically or emotionally comes with a price tag. Whether this be medical screenings (prevention), surgery / treatment (correction), or counseling / consulting (aftercare)

If you're going to harm yourself or others, then proceed immediately to the ER. Otherwise, find a therapist who is willing to help on an outpatient basis.

That sounds horrible. I hope you were able to work something out.

Thank you all for your responses and I am sorry that I have been away so long to respond. Things are not good for me and I realize that, and I kind of realize why my t made the ultimatum. I went to an assessment for my county and the person said she was going to recommend iop. I am kind of torn because I think I need in-patient. I am going to go forward with what is recommended and try my best. As far as the relationship with my t, he says things are fine, but I still feel uneasy.

Today has been especially hard for me. I went to my mom's which is bad enough as it is, but I also overheard her interaction with her boyfriend. I was upstairs when he came in, and I was able to overhear everything he said to her. He was so emotionally abusive to her. Calling her stupid and berating her for not having things ready for him when he arrived. When she told him he said he would be coming later, he said she should have known he might arrive early. I listened to all of this without saying anything. I feel like a coward. If it was anyone else I would be telling him what an jerk he is. I know my mom treats me the same way, but I have never seen her in the same position and it is hard. No one, even her, deserves to be treated in such a way.

Thank you so much. This means a lot to me. I am not doing well right now, but I am working on making things better.