Last session.

Yes its that time of year again. Ive just come from my final session for 2weeks. 2 weeks? I mean thats not a whole life time is it? But it sure feels that way. Told T I feel like I'm sitting at a deserted railway station awaiting a train that I hope will come.

Everyone around me knows the train doesn't come this way now but the other option means that I too have to open my eyes wide and accept the train is never gonna come and stand up and leave the station oooorrr just sit and keep the hope frozen.

Leaving the station in the long run is the healthy option, but something in me cannot let go of the hope the train will come!.

But wait!!!! I think just speaking these words to T has opened the door for change. I think I am waking up now, I think I might be begining to allow the fact in that the train doesn't stop here anymore. I think I may be able to stand up and leave the station.

I've been sitting in this station for alllllllllll my life. My god I didn't know it! I'm looking around and life is going on, people are surviving and I'm here too. I survived. I can risk letting go...Oh how long its been, sitting waiting. The pain of reliving that missing train over and over again like some trick nightmare.

Bye

{{{{Mouse}}}}}}

Hey, at least you didn't try to make the deserted train station more comfy like I did :-) I was waiting for my T one week after a long absence (probably 6+ weeks) and another T in the clinic after she came through the waiting area and saw me said to the secretary, "Well, that answers that question!" (if my therapist was coming back that day or not :-) and we all laughed but then my T was late, and she's "never" late so the other T started asking me was I sure, maybe T forgot, etc. and I got to thinking about it and would have sat there till heck froze over, waiting I think. My T did in fact show up and save the day; we both came from a couple hours away in opposite directions and she'd gotten held up in traffic.

"What an awe some analogy!" Bravo! Tremendous! Congrads ! I commend you on your new discovery! Welcome to the new train track.
I just have to keep this in my favorites I want to continue to meditate on this. Thanks for sharing."I hope you continue to share with us as your progress on this journey."

Smilie

P.S. Sometimes it still feels like we are sinking but we really are not.

Another great insight, Mouse.

I'm seeing my T today for the first time in 2 weeks. I didn't think I was going to make it.

I think I keep missing the train, lol.