[labyrinth572]

I feel often like I'm going over the edge into depression. But that's not really what I've been talking about with my new therapist. Honestly, with only 45 minutes a week, I don't have time.

Instead we talk about scheduling my days, and ways to get a job. She acts more like a career counselor, which is great, but I sometimes feel like I can't use her for the dark times.

My darkest thought spirals seem like huge wastes of time for me, and yet I am aware that they have taken me over in the past. I need to deal with them, but I'm starting to wonder if I need a second therapist (which I can't afford) or if I need to find a way to talk about them in very short bursts.

Does anyone else struggle with this? What do you do? Do you separate 20 minutes for suicidal ideation, and the rest for career development? What can I do?

[catonyx]

I would talk to your T about this. It's your therapy so you should spend it however you want to.

[KayDubs]

I was like that with previous Ts. With this one, I kind of went into it with the attitude of "Eff it, I have nothing to lose at this point. This person is professionally obligated to protect my identity and my issues. I literally have nothing to lose except the payment." Overall it paid off.

Just what worked for me, your miles may vary!

ETA: if she's a decent T and she doesn't particularly work with the issues you're presenting with, she'll refer you to another T who is a better fit.

[ThisWayOut]

is she a career/school/guidance counselor, or a therapist?
I think it's ok to open up about the dark stuff to your therapist. I mean, the other stuff can be helpful, but only if you are in a place to be able to address it. If you are constantly consumed by the sui ideation and depression, then that's what you need to focus on. You can always come back to scheduling your days and getting career advice.
My wife's therapist actually hooked her up with an employment specialist (not totally sure what her job title is, but she helps my wife look for work and figure out more of what she wants to do in life)... If you are talking to a therapist or mental health counselor right now (as opposed to a life coach or career counselor), then there's no reason not to talk about the depression.

[labyrinth572]

I think you all misunderstood my problem... I feel like I could talk to her about how bad I feel and all the emotional things I go through. However, my life is stagnant right now and I also need someone to help me figure out logically how to get out of this rut.
I worry that it will be a waste of time to spend my sessions venting and raging and then go home for the rest of the week and stay in bed every day because I can't figure out how to get up and move on with my life and my therapist can't help me with both problems. 45 minutes seems too short, but I can't afford more time.

[ThisWayOut]

I've found when I address the stuff that contributes to the depression, or I try tackling the symptoms, everything else becomes easier.
It's hard to get motivated to fill your days when you are really depressed. Maybe if you can get some of that addressed, you will have an easier time with the other stuff? I'm not saying it will solve all your problems, but it might be good to take some time to focus on the "darkness"

[sweetie_7]

Originally Posted by labyrinth572

I think you all misunderstood my problem... I feel like I could talk to her about how bad I feel and all the emotional things I go through. However, my life is stagnant right now and I also need someone to help me figure out logically how to get out of this rut.
I worry that it will be a waste of time to spend my sessions venting and raging and then go home for the rest of the week and stay in bed every day because I can't figure out how to get up and move on with my life and my therapist can't help me with both problems. 45 minutes seems too short, but I can't afford more time.

Can you divide your time? Like 20 to schedule and 20 minutes to vent? I never seem to have enough time with my T. Before I go in to see her I try to think of the most concise way to verbalize what's going on with me. We still get talking and other things come up but it's a good start. Also is there a job center in your area? Ours is called careerlink. They can help you job search and prepare for interviews.