What questions to ask potential therapists?

The training organisation I contacted matched me up with a trainee therapist, to see if we might work together. I spoke to her on the phone, and this woman sounded pretty nice. I was a bit because it's her first year of training, and when I asked about modalities I got the rather vague 'electic' answer, and her saying that she doesn't put too much weight in the theories but about what comes up for the individual. When I look at the course she is doing, it mentions a lot of names and I think the course looks really interesting, but unsure as to what questions I need to ask to check out if she is going to be able to work with me.

I asked her about attachment, and trauma, and she replied that in her day job she works with people with drug addiction stemming from attachment and trauma. I asked her in what capacity does she work with these people, and she couldn't really answer, except that it's not psychotherapy.

I don't mean to be blunt, but right now I can't see what great use she would be to me, if she's only been training since last September, one night a week. I'm finding it frustrating that I can't seem to articulate precisely what it is I need in a therapist, and why I am hesitating about seeing this one.

What questions were useful to you when you were determining if a therapist might be a good match?

What obvious steps am I missing?

I hate to get all judgy, but it sounds like you have more experience than she does. A first appointment will settle that, so I hope that's just an ill-formed first impression on my part. I like therapists who can articulate what they do and what their experience is.

For me, it was less about the questions and more about the intangibles--the feel for my therapist's honesty and relational skills. Did she appear to see me as an individual? Was she secure, but not arrogant? Flexible? When I asked if she thought she could help me, and she said she didn't know, I liked that. When I asked if she could hang in there, and she said that was the one thing she did well, I liked that too. When I asked if I could just have a place to go and feel plugged in somewhere, she said that was just fine.

I don't know beyond that...share your main issues and see how she responds. Is she a passive listener-type? Does she jump to conclusions or pat responses? Does she listen and interact thoughtfully? More importantly, how do you feel physically and emotionally with her questions and answers?

Here is a list from another forum:
Questions for a new T - Topic

That list is nice and has some good questions but it seems geared to one particular person's personal needs and experience. I wonder if we can't come up with a more general list here?

One question I would as any potential therapist is:

"Do you have/see a therapist or supervisor for yourself on a regular basis?" This would tie into how they deal with any transference or countertransference issues.

Be on the alert. Be a cautious consumer. My T is "eclectic" and will sell anything from mentoring to meditation to biofeedback. If this prospective T is that new she'll probably have okay supervision but maybe not experience you'd prefer in a T. Then again she will be freshly trained and not a burn-out.

Thank you.

Stopdog, that list is useful, thanks.

Yes she has to have her own therapy as per her training programme, so she will be seeing somebody.

She didn't sound very confident on the phone, she ummed and ahhed a lot. I can't imagine asking her if I thought she could help me. But she sounded nice. Just vague.

If you're looking for a T that can help you with trauma issues, then I don't think T can help. If she has NEVER gone any psychotherapy with a trauma client....that would be a big "no no" for me (I was also looking for a trauma T when searching for mine). I certainly would not want to be the very first trauma client for a T.

My T has over 10 years of experience and tends to "umm...ahhh" when he's thinking of something to say lol. That may just a personality/style of speech thing.

I would say you have nothing to lose by meeting her 1 time. During the meeting, see what vibes you get in person. I would also recommend being honest/blunt with her about the issues you want to work on during therapy, and asking her flat out what in her education/experience makes her think she can help you with your particular issues/goals.

I would also her ask basic policy questions such as canceling, contact outside session if that's important to you etc.

P.S. I know you're going through a training organization......is it possible for you to request a trainee T that has more experience? As in a trainee who is in her last year of training versus someone who just started a few months ago?

Yes, alarm bells were a-ringin' when it seemed like I might be her first trauma client. I can only guess that the work she does with her drug addiction clients in a different context is key working or similar, not therapy.

I was up front about my issues, somehow it didn't seem to help much.

Honestly, it's confusing! First time round I was so wet behind the ears I didn't even ask any questions, I just thought I wanted to talk to somebody. Plus I wasn't so aware of all my attachment crap or trauma murk.

The other thing that's jarring for me is outside the model of either clinical or counselling psychology, I get very dubious about how all these non-academic training programmes operate. All these places in the UK offer 'training' in psychotherapy, and pretty much all want their trainees to start working with clients from their second term. Even if they have come from a totally different background with just a bit of relevant experience like being an auxiliary nurse etc

I'm not sure how I feel about that.

Bleurgh. I don't like this process! Five months until I start DBT so not crucial to find somebody I suppose.

All therapists are works in progress and learning their craft as they go. They make mistakes all throughout, but the first clients are their "best teachers."

I've had enough pain in my life, so I don't need to be the person who expands a therapist's skills. I can just imagine a newish therapist looking at my life story and thinking, "Oh, PJ has this abuse issue and that trauma issue, this will be great for me to grow my skills treating those issues."

Um, no thanks!

The therapist I have now has 30 years of experience, which is nearly as long as I've been alive. That may be a bit extreme for you, but I think you're asking the right questions.

I think you need a therapist with some years under her belt. Someone who has treated a wide range of MI issues. A trainee is not for you, I think. She/he needs to walk through the fires with you, not tip toe.

It sounds like youd want someone more experienced. There are clinical programs in the US that are very selective and theit trainees are probably quite good. But it sounds like you arent in a rush, waiting for DBT. Hang in there find a good match

Looking for a Therapist? Key Questions to Help You Find the Right One | World of Psychology

This was on the main sight today

As I look for a new T myself I´m as you a bit concerned about T:s who can´t express how they work. If they say they´ll adapt to the client, I believe they are not that sure themselves upon which theories they foremost ground their work. Every T has to adapt to the client, psychotherapy can never be standardized.

To me boundaries are very important to know about and that´s one question I would recommend you to ask this potential T about. I find several T:s speaking of quite loose boundaries, that a client may "e-mail under certain circumstances" and such things and when the client does, the client might get unwanted reactions from the T. My point is that when T:s meeting with new clients they can seem more available than they actually are, I´ve experienced this myself.

They talk about being comfortable within several modalities although they perhaps have real experience from just one or two modalities. There are a lot to ask. I know rather a lot about therapy and by showing this to a T, you can also find out if she/he accepts a client who prabably will question them.

I wish you good luck if you decide to meet with this potential T.

Ask about termination policies. I think that is THE most important aspect of therapy. How will this end? What might end it? It needs to be in writing or very clear from the start. Termination affects EVERYTHING about therapy.

There are lots of other important issues which have already been mentioned, but PLEASE ask about termination.

I think the termination subject is also good to bring up. In fact, I talked to my therapist about the fact that I hate that term. She doesn't like it either, but we couldn't come up with a better phrase. Crossing over? Passing on? Just doesn't have a pleasant ring to it.