Couch 90 - nine tee - not nine teen.

Something made me think about rice pudding earlier. I don't know why, I've never eaten it or made it. So I looked up a recipe and made some. It is delicious.

I love rice pudding. Come to think of it, I have most of the ingredients. This might be dinner.

Anyone wanna put some cool whip on that rice pudding? So much for not hanging out in McDonald's anymore. I need to let the kids run off all the built up energy from being stuck inside all day so I don't have the downstairs neighbor reporting me again Can't win for losing:/

Cool whip?

JS I just got home from picking up teenagers from work and boyfriend's house, 6 year old is JUST NOW crashed, it's coming up on 1 am. Yep, I feel you on kids and energy.

Your downstairs neighbor should be an upstairs tenant. Then she could report your next door neighbor and leave you out of it.

Did your boss not route today's calls to you, or were there just none?

Today I seriously felt manic. Giddy and giggly and carefree and hyped up. Then I accomplished one chore and immediately deflated, took a 2 hour nap, woke up groggy and grumpy. Wtf? I can't keep a good mood going for one afternoon!

Downstairs neighbor is just a jerk. We weren't even there one night but he was up banging on the door. It's part of living in an apartment, people have to walk around, if you have a problem with it, live upstairs. I wanted a ground floor unit, because I have kids and kids are noisy, it's the nature of the beast, but there were none available. As for music neighbor - as long as they're not blasting the bass at night I won't report them. People have a right to live in their homes.

I don't know what happened with the calls. My boss is a bit scattered so it's likely she forgot to route them to me. I need to get a proper job ASAP, my boss is a lovely person and has been very good to me but her disorganization makes me panicky.

Hate it when that happens...

I'm facing a big decision as far as work, and have an idgaf attitude about it. I'm expected to show up Monday even if I have Ebola, because my supervisor and I have a meeting with her boss. Yippee. If it ends in termination I will be thankful yet screwed at the same time.

If I terminate I can withdraw my retirement account, if I stay at work I can keep earning food and shelter for my family and not much else. My retirement account could have us completely debt free and I could work a more fulfilling job for a paycut and still hold my sanity.

Who's really going to retire anyway? I'll be a greeter at Walmart when I'm 70 because I won't be any more fiscally responsible then than I have been thus far.

Sorry dumped that on your lap, let me clean that up a little.

Good luck finding a better job!

I know I can get a decent job, I just get overwhelmed and panicky ever time I start looking. A decent job with good structure would go a long way towards making me feel more stable, but to get there... I'm so tired of feeling like this. I'm a wreck all the time. I got two phone calls from friends this afternoon. I know talking to them would have made me feel better but I was too upset and panicky to pick up the phone. How am I ever going to get past these types of reactions?

One day at a time, one minute at a time, and for me sometimes one breath at a time.

You've had incredible courage and upheaval in your life, now you're settling in to a new routine in a new place more alone than ever.

This is the scariest thing I've ever had to do, so I'm sure you're scared too. Who thought it was a good idea to leave ME in charge?

We'll support you, lady! Tell me what I can do to help.

Thanks Stressed
I know I put myself under too much pressure. I hate looking less than in control. Of course the illusion of control that I'm so good at projecting keeps me from getting the support that I need. It's actually a major achievement for me to have let go of that perfect picture. And it's part of what has me so upset, a huge part. I'm not 'supposed' to let anyone know I'm not the perfect wife/daughter/mother.
I *know* I've come a long way. I just *feel* like a complete wreck. Have to keep reminding myself.

OMG you are talking about me! The illusion that I've got this, no worries, I am not struggling at all, I'm perfect, that is what I WANT people to see me as. If they knew what a total mess I am something horrible would happen I just don't know what it would be.

So when Ms. Perfect has a breakdown at work, no wonder she doesn't want to go back. Maybe I've been decompensating for a while now. . .

You are amazing you know. You've left your abuser, lived in less than ideal housing for a long time, now you're starting over again in a new home, it's awesome! Let yourself acknowledge that, even if it seems small, think how many women don't leave.

Must give in to the siren call of slumber. I hope you get some rest lady!

Hello? Anyone about?

Cool whip! Thepower of cool whip has diminished.....

I need a joke or something to cheer me up

I miss ready and squirrel and ike and critterlady.and others

Hulloooooo BPA! I'm enroute to my bed but waving on the way by

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Thanks sleep well.

My T keeps telling me that too! I'm all but... but... I'm supposed to do *better*. Then he just asks why I do that to myself and then I get confused... Do what to myself...?
I know, I know...
Thanks Stressed

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Ok night couch ill checkin later

Cool whip!!

i love cool whip.

I have a question for those internet smart people out there..

I was looking in my spam folder, and I saw an email sent from myself, to myself... I opened it and it was spam. And not really sent by me. So, I hovered over the address it was sent from.. and it says my name (actually my name how it is set up on fb) @ooops.biz something like that. Anyways, it was sent to me, and a couple of other people in my contact list. So, if the email didn't have the @gmail.com than it didn't really come from my gmail account right? I just changed my password for that account to be safe, but I am a bit worried.