T:s who accept and deal with anger and attachment?

After I was terminated I´m still looking for a T, I´ve been looking for eight months now and I feel worse as more and more times passes. I know I need a T who can deal with anger and disappointment and who understands that I need someone I can trust and get attached to.

But all I seem to find is T:s that sits in their chairs like it was some kind of coffee talk and they don´t show that much empathy. It feels like wasting time and like they don´t want to get any deeper connection with me as a client. For me that´s crucial but I don´t know how to find such a T.

I want a psychodynamic T and I´ve seen only T:s working within this kind of therapy. I´m sure about the form of therapy per se. But all T:s I´ve met with seem to work with quite "easy" problems where the client is satisfied if he/she gets to talk a little to someone.

My former T who terminated me had more of focus on creating a deeper relation and to really understand me. But it seems most T:s don´t.

I really don´t know what to ask for anymore, I´ve presented my problems to the T:s I´ve met and I´ve told them I want to work through things on a more deeper level. I understand this can´t happen immediately but noone has said like "yes, that´s the way I work".

I also need a T who can handle some anger, I´m not aggressive but I´m angry about how I was treated as a child and I have problems with feelings of abandonment and alienation. I need to talk about this and I know there´s a risk I´ll look upon the T as a person who abandons me.

I don´t want to go into psychoanalysis though but I don´t know what to really ask for, no T so far has got what I want so to speak. Any advice?

I would probably look for a highly experienced therapist, 20+ years who does depth psychotherapy, who's been through therapy a long time themselves, who dealt with some of those issues in their own life, and give them what you just wrote here.

My therapist fits the bill you describe and she has those qualities. Also, look for someone who doesn't "specialize" in everything, but in a few things, including your concerns, so you don't get someone who tends to just deal with malaise or lighter stuff. It seems to me that those who deal with PTSD, especially due to early family trauma, and some of the other more serious mental disorders are better suited to dealing with that much emotion and the attachment that needs to happen if what you're looking for is a corrective/repairative experience (not a redo of course, but a revisiting to repair the early hurts.)

And I'd probably be sure and interview several to avoid settling too early.

I think experience counts for a lot. I understand what it's like out there. Its tough.

My question in all this about finding a good therapist is that when you call their office you can't find out anything. If you make an appointment, how do you know what they believe in until the therapy gets under way. It takes a lot of guts to give a T a questionaire, where many of us just don't have the nerve and knowledge, and is one reason we go to treatment.
Therapists don't pass out brochures on their treatment philosophy, and some are really rough on dependency. I had the same shallow therapists, one after the other, and went through some nightmare experiences with the attachment. I finally found a good long-term psychodynamic relationship therapist at my university clinic, but totally by accident.
Just speculating, but if there's a university within driving distance of you, they would be up on the modern, humane therapy for attachment. But if so, be sure it isn't a brief therapy, or a trainee who will ditch you when he graduates.

The one I see does not seem to take anger personally (sometimes she probably should as it is) but I found her attempts to do empathy at me were awful. I find it much better now that she (as she put it) is less kind - she did seem surprised when I expressed surprise that she thought she had been being kind to begin with.
I also directly asked some questions.

My T's practice has a website where all the T's list their philosophies along with some stuff about themselves. It helps in giving a sense of who they are and their personality as T's. So maybe try to find a practice that does that? Or if it's an individual T in private practice, if they have their own website? Of course you can't know for sure till you get in there, but at least if you can get some sense of them in advance, that could help.

I haven´t met him yet, I go Monday, but I found my T by sending an email to their office just asking why I should make an appointment. I received no reply from some, cg replies from others and one who sent me the T´s CV with a request that I explain a little about what I was looking to achieve at the appointment so that I could receive a personal reply with a suggested treatment plan. I booked an appointment with him immediately.

It doesn´t need to be someone close geographically either, many offer Skype chats.

(ps I´m a total newbie, I take it T stands for therapist?)

I know you said you don't want to do psychoanalysis, but there are modern forms of this type of therapy. Look for relational psychoanalysis.