Signs of a bad therapist

Yes. I will consider it though I doubt it will do much good. My T will lie and make up stories to cover his ___ (he even teaches this to other clients). I think you are right on the money there about being mentally ill. Mine was. He needn't try labeling me or anyone else until he realizes how many labels fit him as well. I went to a T for help and he has given me more problems than I ever could have imagined. Telling the enemy about my life. Something I WOULD NEVER DO!! I WOULD NEVER TELL HER ANYTHING AND DO YOU KNOW WHY??? Think about it. I'm sure my T knows why, by now, but then he is just as bad. My T exemplifies what NOT to do as a T.

1) When your T starts seeing someone you know. It's a BAD SIGN.
2) When your T starts telling others about your life. It's a BAD SIGN.
3) 1 & 2 are bad enough. No need to throw fuel on the fire.

Exactly. I find the article very black and white,too. Most of the times there is isn't one true way.

Being in school myself I've come across people who fit the profile of a T who might do a lot of damage. The ones that are too warm and fuzzy in what I find to be a condescending way. Some of these are they savior types who think they are going to heal the poor, wounded person who can't care for themselves. There aren't that many of these though, and many of the professors I've had are very down to earth. Maybe it's because I'm at a state university, but the professors I've had show respect for their clients - they don't belittle or otherwise trash talk clients. Some are arrogant, but that's to be expected. Even In my work so far so I've yet to see clinicians belittle or mock clients at all. I know it happens, but I haven't seen it yet. I do think it's important to remember that this is more the result of people being jerks and this type of jerk can be found in any profession. It happens with bad teachers, bad lawyers, bad doctors, bad cops...the list goes on. If you have had a bad T get away from them fast and report them if you think you should. Otherwise it's not worth worrying about unless it's to be glad you don't have that T (or you aren't that T). If you are going to bother seeing a therapist then I'd worry about finding one you can work with. One person's great T can be someone else's worst nightmare.

the article completely describes how things were with my first therapist. i am so glad my current t is not like this.

^
I wish someone warned me about so many bad therapists out there. Even people on PC urged me to go back to mine when I was having trouble. People here didn't know I was seeing a bad T. They believed, as I did, that most people were good. I've learned since then, that they are not. I don't know how I could trust another.

I think sometimes some clients are so vulnerable and so desperate for a connection with anyone that they have to live in denial of how harmful their therapist really is. And therapists take advantage of this for monetary gain and/or to stroke their overinflated egos. It's sad.

Written by a therapist. For what that is worth.

Therapists Spill: Red Flags A Clinician Isn?t Right For You | Psych Central

hi puzzle_bug1987
I hear you about a bad therapist. I had one of those bad therapist in the past. My therapist that I had before my current therapist that im seeing now this one therapist I had was so bad that every time I left his office I wasn't getting any better I got worse . he made felt like therapy wasn't working out w him cuz I never cared to show me his treatment plans for me nor he doesn't accept calls when you are in a crisis situation . w my therapist that im seeing now she calls back when im in a crisis situation and she even called me back up after I had my surgery done last month. my old therapist just left me to figure things out on my own w/o his help in between sessions. my therapist today helps me out when im in a crisis situation . at least she is there for me when im in a crisis situation .

I am glad you found someone better.

Professional Therapy Never Includes Sex


Professional Therapy Never Includes Sex - California Department of Consumer Affairs

WARNING SIGNS

In most sexual abuse or exploitation cases, other inappropriate behavior comes first. While it may be subtle or confusing, it usually feels uncomfortable to the patient. Some clues or warning signs are:

Telling sexual jokes or stories.
"Making eyes at" or giving seductive looks to the patient.
Discussing the therapist's sex life or relationships excessively.
Sitting too close, initiating hugging, holding the patient or lying next to the patient.
Another warning sign is "special" treatment by a therapist, such as:

Inviting a patient to lunch, dinner or other social activities.
Dating.
Changing any of the office's business practices (for example, scheduling late appointments so no one is around, having sessions away from the office, etc.).
Confiding in a patient (for example, about the therapist's love life, work problems, etc.).
Telling a patient that he or she is special, or that the therapist loves him or her.
Relying on a patient for personal and emotional support.
Giving or receiving significant gifts.
Signs of inappropriate behavior and misuse of power include:

Hiring a patient to do work for the therapist, or bartering goods or services to pay for therapy.
Suggesting or supporting the patient's isolation from social support systems, increasing dependency on the therapist.
Providing or using alcohol (or drugs) during sessions.
Any violation of the patient's rights as a consumer (see "Patient Bill of Rights,").
Therapy is meant to be a guided learning experience, during which therapists help patients to find their own answers and feel better about themselves and their lives. A patient should never feel intimidated or threatened by a therapist's behavior.

If you are experiencing any of these warning signs, trust your own feelings. Check on the therapist's behavior with a different therapist, or with any of the agencies in "Where To Start". Depending on what you find out, you may want to find another therapist.

Thank you for posting that. I can look back and see things that were wrong about my therapist that I didn't see at the time. That is frustrating. I don't understand why I thought things were good when they were not.

thanks for this.

[quote]I saw a therapist for a few months who came highly recommended but seemed to hold a magnifying glass to all of my issues. I felt worse. I talked with her about it and felt even more pathologized. I was confused about whether she was just helping me see my “stuff” and I was being defensive, but made the choice to tell her I needed to end our work together. It turns out, this was the beginning of me setting healthy boundaries for myself and also led to my finding a therapist with whom I feel completely safe and positively regarded, even when we are processing my less than desirable aspects of self. [/unquote]
- I have experienced this exact thing! Thank you for posting that article!

Yep I got one of those

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I realized that something with my first PT was off, when he started to not pick up on the topics I mentioned that bugged me, but chose topics that he was more interested in. Or when he started to talk about his personal opinions on very "hot" political topics. Or when he made statements about my personality very quickly after the first few sessions which I felt were completely off. Or when I realized that he mixed me up with other patients and clearly didn't remember who I was.
Or, and this still makes me mad, when he told me to "just relax and enjoy my boyfriend", when I had just told him that I was miserable because of this exact boyfriend's alcohol abuse and anger problem. I felt like he did not take me seriously and treated me like a child.
The positive thing is: I learned to stand up for myself when I ended the therapy and found a new T.

The more I hear about bad therapists the more I wonder if the words good and therapist even go together at all. I am glad you learned to stand up for yourself.

This cracks me up and I have missed your mordant comments!

Being in school now, I have the impression that the vast majority of my classmates are good people, although some still have a lot of their own unresolved issues. But the vast majority don't yet have the skills to handle trauma, let alone complex trauma.

I'm actually in the camp that believes the relationship is the most powerful healing element in therapy, but that doesn't mean I want to make my clients more dependent and keep them around forever. I want to create the kind of relationship that empowers people to work towards their goals and create other positive relationships in their life.

I've never heard anyone at school say anything judgmental about a client or clients in general, FWIW.

there are many things that can a good therapist become a therapist. here's one of those reasons : my old therapist that I had in the past wasn't even qualified to be a counselor instead he only had a bachelor's of arts degree in counseling . no master's degree in counseling.he wasn't even licensed by the state of Ohio and he didn't display it where it can be seen by his clients whether or not he is an LPCC w a license to practice to be a counselor .another thing that makes a good therapist become a bad therapist is by that they don't call you when you are in a crisis situation or they don't give you any coping skills in between sessions . my old therapist didn't do that w me at all. I can't call him when its a crisis situation or to ask him a question. also my old therapist didn't diagnosed me or show me his treatment plans for me . no treatment plans no nothing . no coping skills in between sessions no calls to him whenever you're in a crisis situation no nothing . he just left for me do it for him .no suggestions or no support from him .thank goodness I left him and the counseling center that he was affiliated with along with the two psychiatrists I saw there too . the one psychiatrist kept asking me to see my journal . I was like no way im not showing my journal to you woman .the other psychiatrist just kept jacking up my Zoloft to 275 mgs daily .that is y I left the counseling center that I went for about five years .now I'm w my therapist and psychiatrist today and they know what they are doing . im able to call my therapist whenever im in a crisis situation . my therapist called me when I was home from the hospital after my surgery just to check up on me to see how I was doing after the surgery .






Diagnosis: Anxiety and depression
meds : Cymbalta 60 mgs at night
Vistaril 2 25 mgs daily for anxiety prn
50 mgs at night for insomnia

I thought I was seeing a professional. I was referred with a good recommendation. Being that I was in turmoil, as I'm sure many other clients are in therapy, I was blind to any signs that may have been there. It was mentioned somewhere about going with your instincts but my instincts told me I found a great therapist. He never told me he had any problems with me. I had no idea he was speaking to someone in my private life about me! How could he turn against me and breach my confidentiality? Why not just come to me and tell me that you no longer want me as a client? You found a replacement for me and her problems are so easy I get to flirt with her through most of the session.

hi sizzling,
that is breach of confidentiality between you and the therapist.he crossed a very unethical line here my friend . I would say report him to the state licensing office so that he won't be able to practice being a counselor anywhere in the country . he is not supposed to be involved with his clients romantically at all.that is very unethical to his professionalism as a counselor .let alone sharing information with others w/o your written consent is another breach of confidentiality between you and him .







Diagnosis: Anxiety and depression
meds : Cymbalta 60 mgs at night
Vistaril 2 25 mgs daily for anxiety prn
50 mgs at night for insomnia

Starting to think that is true.

When I got emotional on the phone with my T following termination, she seemed vexed and proceeded to label my behavior "emotional disregulation" and recommended "treatment" in the form of DBT.

On a later phone call she got emotional and teary. I could have been a smart *** and turned the tables, but I did not.

The labeling was totally inappropriate, but the the hypocrisy was hard to take too. If she is as wounded as she now appears, she indeed had no business working with me.

A lot of these articles about bad therapists focus on the obvious -- overtly unethical behavior, not listening, excess disclosure, etc.

What is rarely mentioned is the scenario where things are going fairly well, then there is a rupture, possibly followed by sudden disillusionment and lost of trust, then possibly abrupt and traumatic termination.

Clients are susceptible to being ambushed in this way because therapists are playing a role rather than being themselves.

In my explorations to understand why my destructive therapists acted as they did, I concluded the problems were systemic. I wasn't truly respected. When the conflict boiled down to my narrative vs. theirs, they threw me under the bus insisting I couldn't discern reality. They asserted my grievances were transference and "material" as opposed to their bad behavior. And from the theory I've read, the literature backs them.

Freud himself called patients --rabble.

There's a relatively new book on ethics which describes various possible ethical dilemmas--like seducing the patient--in adorable little narratives. In every case, the story shows the patient as a low IQ, ridiculous loser. Professionals, including a former APA president, have praised this new book to the skies. If reception to this book is a microcosm of how providers really feel about clients, heaven help us.

The psych literature I've read largely is remote, abstract and reductionist--far removed from the human dilemmas I've dealt with through life. While I'm convinced that most psych providers are ethical souls who sincerely how to help others, I question how training prepares them for it.

I agree. It's understandable. To finally experience a connection with someone can become like a drug -- very addictive because it feels so incredibly good. I think part of the reasons the therapists allow is for monetary gain and/or for ego stroke. But I also think so many T's are mentally unwell themselves that they crave the connection just as much, which makes them blind to the damage they are causing the client.