My therapist Abandoned me

Its been over 6 months now since I last seen my therapist. We had been working together for 5 years. I was very attached to them and they were like a parental figure.....a secure base, the only bit of security I had.
Then suddenly 6 months ago she tells me she is taking time out from being a therapist and doesn't know when she will be back - likely years.

To say I am still totally gutted is a massive understatement. Time doesn't make it easier, it actually hurts more. I was given 6 sessions to end, it felt like nothing and that was it - not even any real care to stay in contact. My heart has been ripped apart and I don't know if I will ever get over it. The person I trusted the most has hurt me the most and it has ruined a lot of the work we did beforehand. How can I believe this person ever cared if they were able to wipe me out of their exisitance so quickly?

I don't want to start therapy with anyone else - why bother, just to be dumped again.

I told my therapist that the time they were giving me was wrong etc but they didn't seem to think they were doing anything wrong.

This year has been the worst year of my life (for so many reasons).

There is just no way to deal with the heartache

I agree. Sorry this happened to you.

This is sooo painful. After 5 years you must be so attached and shocked, like it is impossible to ever get over it, especially because your T seems to not offer any contact afterwards. Is there any contact at all, even one email/postcard a year, or something? I can't imagine how hurt you must be.

Seeing T for third year, I wonder how I'll cope. I should just make a break now. Hugs.

There hasn't been any contact since no. Yeah I miss them so much that it's just agony in my heart sometimes. I feel it was very selfish of them and it makes me feel worthless because her opinion meant so much to me.

I am sorry you are in so much pain. That must be so hard. I hope things get better for you!

I'm sorry you're going through this. My ex-T abandoned me 9 months ago.

For me, I knew I had to have another T asap. I didn't want a new one. I didn't trust the profession anymore. But I needed help and the only type of thing that would help was therapy. My new T has rarely helped me out. The first 6 months were the hardest. New T was communicating with ex-T for me, there were a lot of misunderstandings and miscommunication. The trust wasn't there. But now that ex-T is out of the picture, things got better with my new T.

Hi Scarlet, I am so sorry that your ex therapist did the same thing. how long were you with them? how long did they give you to finish?
My ex t wouldn't even recommend another therapist for me because they thought it would just mean I would pick them to have a connection to my T and they said I was capable of finding and choosing a therapist myself - this hurt too. It was all so cold. it was like 5 years meant nothing I am trying to seek mental health help from someone I saw in the past but I don't know how long I will be waiting for that. I feel such anger and such heart ache. I thought after 6 months I would be doing better but it has just gotten harder and harder.

Thank you for the support guys x

So sorry you are dealing with this. My biggest fear is that my T will abandon me.

I was with my ex-T for 17 months. My story is kinda complicated, so I'm not going to get into all the details. On March 10th, I went to therapy like any other day. I sat down on the couch and she told me we're terminating. I cried, I begged. She wouldn't give me any answers. So I left. (That's the simplified story). In her last email to me, she told me to never contact her again.

The grieving process has been difficult. I have gotten a lot of support from PC, my fiance, and my new T. I wouldn't be where I'm at now w/o them. Just being able to repeat myself over and over again, having people relate, encourage, listen....it helped so much. But the grieving process is different for everyone.

The best advice I can give you is to continue to reach out for support and be patient with yourself.

Scarlet,

I can so relate to your posts. How did you ever trust the profession again and find a new T? My T abandoned me suddenly after 3 years with no explanation. She refuses to let me communicate with her in any way. I don't feel I can ever trust again until I understand what happened, and since she won't communicate with me, I feel my only option it to confront her in person. I am attempting to do this now after backing off for almost two months. If I don't resolve this issue, I am done. Any suggestions on how to reach my therapist and how to move on to trust again? Also, do you know any legal reason she won't speak with me? She is very by the book when it comes to rules. I am thinking of having my medical doctor try to reach her or going to see a new T just to get this issue resolved.

Thanks,
J