Home Menu

Menu


View Poll Results: Is your T a blank slate or does she share something of herself with you?
My T is a complete blank slate, he never says anything that is not directly related to me. 7 9.46%
My T is a complete blank slate, he never says anything that is not directly related to me.
7 9.46%
My T may talk about a book she has read or a place she has visited or something that is not related to me occaisionally. 17 22.97%
My T may talk about a book she has read or a place she has visited or something that is not related to me occaisionally.
17 22.97%
My T often talks about things that are not related to me. 5 6.76%
My T often talks about things that are not related to me.
5 6.76%
My T has told me a few detals about her personal life. 38 51.35%
My T has told me a few detals about her personal life.
38 51.35%
My T has told me quite a lot about her personal life. 15 20.27%
My T has told me quite a lot about her personal life.
15 20.27%
I know a huge amount about my T. 9 12.16%
I know a huge amount about my T.
9 12.16%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 74. You may not vote on this poll

Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #51  
Old May 03, 2016, 05:41 PM
Anonymous37817
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
I'm no sure I really get how knowing myself will help me feel more of a human connection with my T - or perhaps you mean I'll feel more of a connection with other people? I'd like to understand it though - if you can explain.
Ditto. I'd like to know too. i know myself well at this point, after more than 6 years of therapy, but feel lacking in the connection department.

advertisement
  #52  
Old May 03, 2016, 07:06 PM
junkDNA's Avatar
junkDNA junkDNA is offline
Comfy Sedation
 
Member Since: Sep 2012
Location: the woods
Posts: 19,305
He used to hand me tissues but I never took them. In the beginning my crying was intense sobbing episodes. He would sit with me and/or talk to me to try to calm down. These days I talk thru my tears

Sent from my SM-G900V using Tapatalk
__________________
  #53  
Old May 03, 2016, 09:20 PM
junkDNA's Avatar
junkDNA junkDNA is offline
Comfy Sedation
 
Member Since: Sep 2012
Location: the woods
Posts: 19,305
Quote:
Originally Posted by junkDNA View Post
He used to hand me tissues but I never took them. In the beginning my crying was intense sobbing episodes. He would sit with me and/or talk to me to try to calm down. These days I talk thru my tears

Sent from my SM-G900V using Tapatalk
wow..........wrong thread
__________________
Thanks for this!
LonesomeTonight
  #54  
Old May 03, 2016, 10:09 PM
bounceback bounceback is offline
Grand Member
 
Member Since: Jan 2011
Posts: 799
My T was pretty much a blank slate for the most part. I worked with her for along time so I got to know more about her. I never really asked her questions because she would deflect them back to me. Most of the stuff I found out about her I learned from googling her extensively on the internet. I saw a picture of her with a drink and it blew me away. Sometimes when she would share something it would pain me like she had a good relationship with her father and they were close while my father was pretty much nonexistent for many years. I was torn between wanting to know more about her but yet feeling pained when I would find out too much.
  #55  
Old May 03, 2016, 10:32 PM
Nammu's Avatar
Nammu Nammu is offline
Crone
 
Member Since: May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 76,693
Never had a blank slate T...would have driven me crazy. I got know basic stuff like what books they read in order to trust them. Never knew details and didn't want to know didn't ask, if I had they probably would have shared a few innocent things.
__________________
Nammu
…Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …...
Desiderata Max Ehrmann



  #56  
Old May 03, 2016, 10:42 PM
ThisWayOut's Avatar
ThisWayOut ThisWayOut is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Jan 2013
Location: in my own little world
Posts: 4,227
My t is rather open in general, though we have addressed my worries about knowing too much about her (brought up by a few experiences with other t's). She doesn't cross the line into dual relationships, but I have quite a bit of knowledge about t's personal life/ life outside the t office. I'm undecided about how much it helps. On the one hand, I like knowing t has a balance between personal and professional, and that she takes time to care for her whole self. On the other hand, I sometimes worry that I might have too much knowledge that may end up being hurtful. I've had t's tell me things they should have reserved for colleagues, and it ultimately caused me way more worry than necessary (and still occasionally impacts my life though it has been years since I left their clinics)... I dunno. Like I said, I'm undecided about the value of it, though I likely would panic about a t who was a complete blank slate (too much space for my transference and fears to run amuck).
  #57  
Old May 04, 2016, 06:52 AM
Anonymous50122
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisWayOut View Post
My t is rather open in general, though we have addressed my worries about knowing too much about her (brought up by a few experiences with other t's). She doesn't cross the line into dual relationships, but I have quite a bit of knowledge about t's personal life/ life outside the t office. I'm undecided about how much it helps. On the one hand, I like knowing t has a balance between personal and professional, and that she takes time to care for her whole self. On the other hand, I sometimes worry that I might have too much knowledge that may end up being hurtful. I've had t's tell me things they should have reserved for colleagues, and it ultimately caused me way more worry than necessary (and still occasionally impacts my life though it has been years since I left their clinics)... I dunno. Like I said, I'm undecided about the value of it, though I likely would panic about a t who was a complete blank slate (too much space for my transference and fears to run amuck).
Your last sentence chimed with me. I think that my T's blankness has given a lot of space for my fears and negative transference to come out. but I think I need something personal from her to anchor to, to help to resolve my fears insecurity.
  #58  
Old May 05, 2016, 05:18 AM
Coco3's Avatar
Coco3 Coco3 is offline
Veteran Member
 
Member Since: Mar 2015
Location: Somewhere
Posts: 508
I don't think I would have been seeing my T still if he was a blank slate. I hate not knowing things, it makes me crazy. My T isn't an open book, but he's shared some personal stuff in sessions when it related to my stuff. Or when I asked him things about him or his personal life.
  #59  
Old May 05, 2016, 07:31 AM
MobiusPsyche's Avatar
MobiusPsyche MobiusPsyche is offline
Magnate
 
Member Since: Feb 2016
Location: Appalachian Mountains
Posts: 2,040
She is not quite a blank slate but leans in that direction. I believe she makes a purposeful decision to share the things she has shared with me. She does not share just to meet her own needs, or to keep the conversation going, or because she wants to seem relatable.

I do not Google her for a very practical reason: I found out the neighborhood she lives in that way, and now I have to constantly tell myself not to allude to that in conversation because she didn't tell me and I'm not "supposed to know" that (in my mind).

Most of my t's over the years have been of the same temperament; not quite blank slates. It is a good balance for me.

Sent from my mobile device using Tapatalk.
__________________
"I would rather have questions that can't be answered than answers which can't be questioned." --Richard Feynman
Reply
Views: 5095

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 07:27 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.