The Couch 119: Come Join The Human Shelf!

80's Commercials:

"I don't wanna grow up
I'm a Toys'R'Us kid,
There's a million toys
At Toys'R'Us
That I can play with.
From bikes to trains to video games
It's the biggest toy store there is (Gee Whiz)
I don't wanna grow up
Because maybe if I did
I couldn't be a Toys R Us kid"

Okay, really off to bed this time.

Sleep is good, Squirrel. Sleep is good. I need to convince myself of that. Lol. I may have to curl in a little ball though, as resident dog is in the middle of the bed.

God bless!!

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Wow, I wonder what it is finding to eat?!?

The lizard who was playing hide and seek with me earlier this month is still in my room. He just popped his head out again and ran when I looked over at him. Silly lizard. I'm surprised he is not dead yet from starvation. What do chameleons eat anyways? Dust? He would find plenty of that in my room. I always thought they ate bugs.

Catching up on the couch. I've been in a different place today.

Oreo crazy! . Does anyone have an awesome salsa recipe? I don't do sugar, but reading all the Oreo combinations made me want salsa. Can't explain that. It is what it is.

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We have these iridescent looking lizards here. In the summer they like to hang out at the doors that come into our house.

Maybe because of the coolness inside. I don't know. There is presently one inside our house. It peaks out and runs from here to there. It's quite disturbing but we can't catch it and send it back outside.

I've wondered if there was some way to trap it.

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My favourite toy was the Grand Champions Showjumping set.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Grand-Champ.../dp/B0000AC9AE
Pedigree The Champions Real Action Horse Rider's Accessories: | Vectis Toy Auctions
The horses and riders were all fully jointed.

No, I play Ingress and see no reason to add another identical game. (Except that you don't have to play "with" other people in Ingress - that would drive me insane. You can do it in groups, and you get some advantages from doing so, but I've always managed very well playing for the blue team as a solitary.) http://www.wheninmanila.com/ingress-game-lifestyle-social-network/

[eta: Lest I sound like a complete grouch, I'm sure I would enjoy Pokemon Go very much indeed, it's just that the slot has already been filled for me. And I generally stay away from things that are too heavily hyped - it's a character flaw with me.]

I just started playing Pokemon go last night and it does force you to get up and move!!! I'm out of poke balls and it's sad that I'm considering driving to a poke stop location. It's a hundred degrees here after all

((Incas))

A difficult situation. You didn't have all the facts. You didn't even have time to think. So you did what you were asked to do. I don't blame you for that.

Next phase, new wave, dance craze, anyways
It's still rock and roll to me

"Cecil the Seasick Sea Serpent", the box says. And he looks it, too!

Aw, i knew that from memory! I loved beany and cecil! Cecil was so goofy! It was a cartoon show.

You eat Oreos with salsa?

I never heard of those before. but there sorta cute in a weird way.

Good morning couch! Well I was a lazy layabed this morning. Didn't get up until 0830. Showered, ate breakfast, probably should get another load of laundry started before I leave for t in about 40 minutes.

Sitting at a stoplight on my way to t. Nervous, heart pounding but i am ready to talk about what she brought up 2 weeks ago. ....Now i am at t's. Wish me luck.

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Good luck!

Got home from t a little over an hour ago, been relaxing and processing my session. It was a really good one, I'm feeling kinda wiped out and like taking a nap, but wanted to check in here first. I told t all the stuff I'd wanted to, the work I did over the past couple weeks we discussed it in little bits as it came out, she said I'd done some really good work and I had to agree. We did some work with a dream I had last night that at first I didn't think was related but how about that, as we were talking about it, I could see that it actually was! I told her how last Saturday I was wishing I was there, but I said by the time I wanted to ask it was already Thursday night and that felt too last-minute. She said no, it was not too last-minute and that I should have texted. She said "you don't have to punish yourself." I said it wasn't about that, it just felt disrespectful to ask that close to Saturday. She told me that unless/until she gets super-busy, she holds that time open for me in case I need or want it. I didn't know what to say to that so I just mumbled a 'thank you'. I struggle to feel worthy of that. But apparently there aren't a lot of clients who want weekend appts - she'd said one time that most people want weekday evenings. I like going on Saturday - I'm not already tired from working all day, and I have the rest of the weekend to process besides.

Anyway I was sooooo nervous as I drove down her road, but as soon as I sat down in her office I took a deep breath and just dove right in and it wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be. I cried a little, of course, but then I get emotional a lot that's just part of who I am. I told her as much as the topic sucks, it also feels good to have gotten this understanding of why I am the way I am. I'm emotionally wiped though.... think I'm gonna go take a nap.

ETA: oh yeah I showed her a few more pictures of me when I was young. It's weird how the look on my face is almost exactly the same in all of them - except for the ones where I'm outside, then I have a little smile - but for the most part, I have a kind of scared, almost haunted look on my face. And when my siblings are in the same pic, I seem to always be standing a little off to the side from them too, or leaning away, like I don't belong or something. Kind of sad. I have gained much compassion for my younger self through the past 2 weeks.

Hi couch. Bummed my mentor didn't come today. Bored. Want to self-injury but trying not to. Crappy day.

Sorry you're having a bad day. Keep trying not to self harm! You can do it! Hugs.

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Thank you! I did give in and hurt myself a little but nothing too bad and the urges have seemed to pass.

BayBrony and Shakey, I'm thinking about both of you this afternoon and hope you're both doing ok.

art i think you are so amazingly brave to be able to go in there bring up what you want to talk about and do it .i have been trying for 5 years

all this stuff going on with my boy is so hard . im so down tonight .he is moving back home today and i have not heard anything about what is going on .is he coming home or what is he doing . i know he is going to be depressed so time to take more xanax . i dont know how to deal with all this nonstop. i just want him to get a place to live and move on