Are you cautious or dive right in with new T?

I am curious about how others approach this. I tend to dive right in and decide whether or not I like how the T responds. They will almost certainly maintain confidentiality.
EDIT - but usually it isn't about what I will be revealing this time; I dove in with details on relationship or depression but held back if the discussion ever went into my past drug use or juvenile delinquency (stuff that would have led to arrest and/or psych hospital if I were caught)

I see a new T tomorrow and one of the reasons is substance use. What I quit this time is pretty tame compared to what's in my past that I still have urges for. I want to go after root causes. If I had a little less will power or luck, I would be in a gutter somewhere. I'm actually quite successful career wise and in the past I hid how deeply troubled I am. I fear that if I start slow about revealing things, I might revert to that. I went wide open with a new pdoc and I think I am getting better treatment.

So what do you do?

EDIT - typo in poll - that should be "Cautious and slow about revealing my secrets"

I'm cautious and slow, but I am utterly impressed by people who are quick and transparent. I think you will get to the deep stuff quicker if you are as honest and forthright as possible. And good for you for getting the support you need to quit your habit!

extreme caution. extremely slow.

I think I trusted her quite quickly, especially for my standards. Although even now I feel myself pushing and pulling, wish I wouldn't and don't understand why I'm like that because She's never been nothing but understanding

I've always been cautious and extremely slow. Sometimes I wish I could be bold and pick up the pace at least a little bit. Good luck tomorrow.

I tend to be slow and guarded. I need to build trust and a relationship with a person before opening up about my biggest issues. T was literally the first person I ever told I was abused abused and it was after seeing her for about 2 years.

Slow for a while, then when I finally decide to trust a T I can't talk fast enough to get it all out. Took about six months for current T. I'm not afraid of confidentiality, I'm afraid of what I say being used against me somehow (family of origin issues there).

Somewhere in the middle, certain issues I'm bring other right away where other more sensitive issues I like to wait a little to make sure the t is decent.

Cautious and slow - I'm very private and guarded and don't trust easily.

That would be different and harder. My secrets are all stuff I did. No violence, way beyond statute of limitations for property crimes and I have finally come to grips with being able to say I have a mental illness. I cannot over stress how big that last point is. Revealing some secrets is tantamount to admitting I have a mental illness because "no one in their right mind would do that".

I poured my heart out straight away with my first therapist (even in the initial email before I met him) and as a result I was vulnerable and ultimately hurt.
With my second therapist I was cautious from day one and it's taken over 2.5 years to get to the point I am at now (there's not much I wouldn't tell him). He recently commented that it was important for me to try out being cautious when I met him and he was right. I didn't want to be hurt again. He has earned my trust.

Somewhere in between?...

A note to the "in between" folks - maybe I should have said "wide open" and "not wide open". there really isn't a gray area in my mind. Either you are holding some stuff back or you aren't.

Cautious with all humans, always

I tend to dive right in within a few sessions.

It took me four months, from mentally committing to therapy and choosing a T online, to plucking up the courage to actually make an appointment and show up.

So I had a lot of time to prepare exactly what to say!

In the first appointment I was brutally honest and laid all my problems - as I saw them - on the table. It was pretty terrifying, but on the other hand I had no connection whatsoever with T, it being the first time we had met and me having no idea about therapy, so as far as relating to T goes I was completely detached. I think I can find it harder to be honest now, maybe, because I have a close relationship with T and I care about what he thinks and how he reacts. On the other hand he knows pretty much everything important since I blurted it all out the first time we met - so that has worked out quite well!

Edited to add: If I had told everything as I did at the start and T was horrible, or cold, or I decided not to pursue therapy or anything like that, I think I wouldn't have cared about what I had said to T. Because I knew it was confidential, and also I didn't really care what T thought. I'm not trying to be horrible, but I am like that with most people unless or until I know them really well. Otherwise I am detached, so they could say and do anything and J wouldn't really care, except for maybe feeling annoyed.

It depends. I always have straight up told them what's wrong. If they asked something more on some topic, I'd answer faithfully. However, up until working with current t for about 6 months, I'd never actually feel anything when talking. I was just stating facts about my life, I did not attach anything more to it. So in that way I was still very cautious by just detaching myself from any emotional response that could happen from talking about things.

In between. The general stuff, I opened up right away. Some issues, I had to open up right away because I needed help right away. But my deepest secret or that I love her, took me some time. I was very cautious.

I've changed over the years from cautious to open right away. It might have helped me too that I've been inpatient for my eating disorder (now recovered from after 20 years) and for trauma therapy regarding childhood abuse more than 10 times for 2 to 6 months each time. That intensity, plus all the groups, helped me realize that my story is not so unique and I need not be embarrassed. I think I got to the point that I don't need to hide that fact that I was abused or any of the related crap that goes with it. I have no problem telling a t everything in the first visit. I don't need to build up trust bc I go in to therapy expecting (trusting) the t will be professional and that's all I need from a t. (in other words, keep confidential what I say, have the education their degree indicates, have general or specialized knowledge in my issues (which I look for before making the appointment) ) To me, going in to the t for the first time is like going in to any doctor the first time. I trust them to do their job.

I'm super open at first and slowly shut down as time goes on. Now I hardly speak. It's not that I no longer have those problems It's just I can no longer find the words to explain myself.

I've been extremely cautious in the process to choose a T. I do my research very carefully. But once I commit, I tend to be as open and vulnerable as possible. It doesn't mean I recite a complete and detailed history--it means I'm fully present in the moment with my emotions. And that could include answering a query with "I'm not prepared to talk about that issue right now." How a T responds to that openness tells me a lot, and I think lends itself to establishing the foundation for a solid working relationship.

Seems to be a trend of about 2:1 preferring to go slow. I saw my new T yesterday and did warp speed. I had typed up 2 pages - one is my MH history the other substance abuse (I had to use 10 pt font and narrow margins to get that on one page; I was a bad boy for a long time). She set them aside to read later and we did a deep dive verbally for much of the hour. It's all out there.

I'd love to be able to dive right in and not waste any time in getting help. But I just can't. Something holds me back.

I am so extremely cautious! This is my first T and just now after 2 years I'm starting to feel the waters! I hope i can dive soon because I already know the water is right for me. But if I get smashed and I have to start all over again with someone else, I'm not sure I would want to stick a toe in it again. am so impressed with everyone that can do that, especially if you already have been crashed

I dove right in with LGBT T. I've been cautious with regular T.