The Couch 150: Ceci n'est pas un couch

I always keep a well-stocked virtual bar with non-alcoholic options in my pocket.

I feel you there - not wanting to talk about feeling rejected by t - the other day when i read that stuff to my t, part of it was my thoughts about what if she said she didn't want to work with me anymore and man I laid my freakin' heart right on the table in between us with that. i felt so vulnerable and that was why I sobbed all the way through the stuff I told her. kind of crazy-sounding to say that i felt more vulnerable telling her that stuff than i did with any of the childhood um stuff we spent so much time working through. I don't get it how this therapeutic relationship is so damn hard and convoluted sometimes.

Yeah, that's probably a large part of the reason that I don't want to delve into any of this with him. I don't want to feel vulnerable because I don't feel safe being vulnerable with him. I opened up and was very honest about my feelings, and his response was "that's great and all, but I'm not the only therapist who can help you. I'll find you someone new," which I took to mean that he doesn't want to work with me anymore. I know it's not what he meant, but it's how I feel.

I'm not dying it's just anxiety.. what I am repeating to myself tonight. Life feels very overwhelming right now, and I am trying to cope on my own. I hope everyone else is having a Friday night.

I think I should stop seeing my T

What's up?

I wrote about it in my thread

Hugs to you, Healed...

I just learned from my sister that the pastor who married my h and I back in 1998 passed away this morning. Pastor Tom was the Godliest man I ever met. I loved him, respected him, and I could have listened to him preach for hours on end. He didn't just "talk religion", he truly lived his faith and it was beautiful to see. He was a gifted minister and so dear to me. I looked forward to seeing him every time I visited back 'home' and he always had a big smile for me and would wrap me in his arms in a big bear hug every time. I loved him a lot, and am so very sad to hear of his passing. I will never forget - at the reception after our wedding, he, dignified pastor that he was, joined everyone else in balancing his spoon on his nose. I must find that picture.

I've been in therapy for 5 years... and still haven't learned how to not let emotions totally overwhelm me.

I haven't learned that in almost 6 years of therapy either.

My t used to exhasperatingly (is that a word?) say to me "Art, you are NOT your feelings!"

I am too.

Has anyone used eggs to wash their hair?

Not to wash but as an ingredient in a hair mask before washing, yes. My favorite is one egg, half an overripe avocado, and a little olive oil.

Mmmmm sounds like the makings of a good salad. Lol

Reminds me of those shampoos from the 70's or so "Gee, Your Hair Smells Terrific" and "Body On Tap" supposed to be like a beer shampoo lol I used to love both of them lol blast from the past man

sorry that was so huge

omg and lemon up! i loved that one!

I am not familiar with hair masks, what are they supposed to do?

I just ran out of shampoo and washed my hair with just water and it feels fine, I was wondering on shampoo-less alternatives and came across egg. Apparently it is a wonder for hair with grease removing properties etc.
I have very greasy hair and I am surprised that just water seems to remove the grease and lots of srubbing

Anais did you say your dinosaur ocarina went missing?

Trying to think on t's words to me in an email earlier this week: "I can stay with the sadness without getting lost in it or stuck
there." Obviously easier said than done, but trying to be conscious of how I am feeling and not letting it get the best of me.

((Healed))

Therapy takes time.

I'm up to review material before I head off to 6 hours of test taking

I feel very tired lol..... -__-

That's a lot of testing...good luck and good morning coffee is on

You can do it, DNA! You were so close last time. Please don't forget your book this time.