Couch 156: The Clock Strikes...

Welcome to the couch, old and new! A place to hang out - sometimes you get immediate feedback, sometimes you don't.

Shouting, "Cool Whip" tends to bring others out from between the cushions if you're feeling lonely.

This is a chatty thread. All are welcome. We're kind of psychologically oriented, sometimes. We try to be supportive. At times we discuss what that means.

It’s a place to plop down on the couch when you come home from work or wherever, or wake up in the middle of the night, or check in at lunch, rant a bit or not, and be among friends.

We advise you not to drink or drug and text your therapist ("T") - we speak from experience...

Sometimes the thread moves fast and you might get overlooked; sometimes it moves slowly and all you hear are crickets. Sometimes you get hugged or thanked pages later. So if it's a bigger question, you might want to start a new thread.

Grab a cushion, a spot on the floor, or an armchair in the corner (or with us) and make yourselves comfy!

Thanks for making a new couch thread, Lost!

I'm waiting for Luc to post pillows and cushions of the new couch.

Thanks for the new couch

Thx for the new couch...

@QM And I'm so glad your T got back to you

Why am I trying to piss my T off? I will have to think about this.

@BCM - Think about it, but please don't let that turn into beating yourself up about it. (It's a hop, skip and a jump for me, with most things.) Though I have never experienced 'trying' to annoy a T.

It's interesting, that I'm still quite new here... But I know a lot about you (couchies).
I know real names of some of you... Or Ts' names. I know your stories and your pains.
It feels like family.
Thank you so much for being here

Thank you for being here, capt.

For me, it's because I'm convinced she will eventually "snap" / reach her limit / I'll exhaust her "quota of tolerance" and then she'll see how awful I really am and then she'll punish me, explode at me etc.

*hugs* Like Lost said, thank you for being here too, and I hope you'll continue to find a safe space and support here.

I have noticed I do it every so often but can't see a pattern. I am triggered by something.

Thank you for being here.

I push and push and I really want to make him angry and I think you may be right. When I first came to PC I really wanted him to just hit me so I know what the score was. I really dont know how to respond to someone who doesnt hit back.

I used to have nightmares of T literally taking a rattan switch to hit me. And in sessions sometimes I half expect she'll get mad and raise her voice or shout.

For me a lot of it is "See, I'm bad. So bad you can't help but hurt me. Because of how bad I am." Probably because growing up and up until several years ago, I could indeed get beaten or slapped repeatedly if I did indeed piss the parents off.

So I'm still amazed T tolerates me sounding angry or even raising my voice or even hitting the table. That she tolerates me ranting in furious texts to her etc.

Part of the reason I am not allowed to text or email as sometimes I get really angry and T wants me to express the anger in the sessions which I cannot do.

My T has told me "It's NOT OK" that I "get so angry inbetween sessions, then come in and shut down" (her quoted words) so I, too, am trying to "bring the anger in"...and it's difficult!

Recently she dug around lots trying to find out if I get angry about how she ALWAYS buzzes me in late. I actually wasn't angry or frustrated in the beginning but as she dug and went on and on about "how do you feeel?" (While telling me we'd talk about what I wanted to talk about later), I got pissed enough to go "I'm always on time. I feel you take it for granted." and then I sniped that she's wasting MY time.

The big rage outbursts at her only happen out of session still though Rage outbursts for me in session tend to be directed at myself and expressed through self harm.

And! I think I grumbled that not everything is a biggg "Ohh QM is REALLY FEELING actually angry or sad but she doesn't know until I, the enlightened therapist, poke around" thing. Told her not every damn thing is her knowing how I feel better than myself.

At least my T doesnt do that. He wont even try to guess what emotion i am describing as he does not understand what i say.

That sounds painful in a different way. Him not understanding or relating to what you're conveying

Thought of some of you therapists-in-training: https://www.reddit.com/r/psychothera...ts_with_scars/

Thanks for the new couch!

Hey new couch. Happy Wednesday!

I think we had a thread about that quite some time ago. Interesting to read also as a not-T :-)

I remember that PC thread! Some great posts there