I have begun to notice that certain actions and words from T can be very triggering

In what ways do you feel triggered by your T because of your own issues?

[LonesomeTonight]

"Boundaries" from my marriage counselor triggers me (like if he says something like "We need to be mindful of boundaries.") Because it suggests something will be taken away. Yet, strangely, when T talks about boundaries, it makes me feel safer in a way...

[Argonautomobile]

I hate being alone with him in a room. It's suffocating. My issues entirely.

[ChickenNoodleSoup]

Any mention of physical touch (not from him, just in general) so far. When I'm already upset, him mentioning abandonment in any way.

Also, it doesn't trigger me, but I feel like some people might be triggered by him

Possible trigger:

making cutting motions over his arms every time he asks whether I did self harm this week.

[NP_Complete]

If he says things that remind me of the things my abusive husband said to me, I feel triggered. He's not doing it on purpose. He just wanders into my personal mine field. He managed to hit three land mines recently, all within a week. I found the courage to tell him that he was reminding me of my husband and I was terrified he was going to start verbally abusing me like he did. I know he won't but at the same time I'm scared he will.

[junkDNA]

Originally Posted by Argonautomobile

I hate being alone with him in a room. It's suffocating. My issues entirely.

Me too. Mainly his office . He accommodates by either leaving the door cracked, going for walks outside, and meeting in a larger group/art room.

When T or anyone really suggests exercise to me as a coping skill, I immediately twist it to them calling me FAT. I've told t about this a lot

Another trigger is feeling that he cares about some other clients more than me and that they get more attention than me. And i have talked about this with him as well

[nottrustin]

It has happen quite a bit over the years but usually we discuss why it was triggered and it helps some. A couple were: when were discussing a family member who was pedofile, she told me if I didn't break off all contact she would have no choice but to make a child protective. She said after the fact she knew I would do the right thing and she would never need to make that call. It brought back when CP was called when I was a teen and that.I was a horrible mom. It is still a very touchy topic to me.

Talk about how when I am in a bad place I am wired to have a lot of negative thoughts...i hear stop being so negative

[Fernwehxx]

Her mentioning medication did trigger me. Yet, we talked it out and 'll is fine now. In general, she can say things to me that would trigger me if they were said by someone else, but they don't when she says them.

[LonesomeTonight]

I thought of another one. For some reason, it would trigger me when ex-T or MC would try to say my OCD was the cause of certain thoughts and behaviors (well, beyond contamination fears and hand-washing). Like if ex-T said I thought about MC so much because of my OCD. Or MC would say I had trouble getting things accomplished not because of possible ADHD, but because of OCD. I'm fine with things being attributed to my anxiety or depression, but for some reason the OCD seemed "dirty" or dismissive of my thoughts just being that. I think it goes back to my parents and my mom saying stuff like, "Aren't you being a little obsessive about that?"

[Elio]

Anything around change - change in our session time, change in the space, change in how we do therapy, anything that might indicate that she will be different.

I can initiate change with significantly less issues. She does or says anything that I take as something changing; I go to the place that I am bad for wanting it the way it was or I am scared because I don't know how it will be different.

Boundaries is similar in the sense that if she brings up something as a boundary, I feel bad for wanting and/or asking for it in the first place.

[stopdog]

Is there a difference in "trigger" versus "uncomfortable"? I really am not sure I understand what is meant by trigger.

[Elio]

Originally Posted by stopdog

Is there a difference in "trigger" versus "uncomfortable"? I really am not sure I understand what is meant by trigger.

I take a trigger to be something that results in me responding or thinking in a way that is not congruent with my adult self. For example, I know it's ok to have likes, wants, and needs. I know that everyone has them. I know that what I like is just about me and they are ok. Those are my adult knows. However, when I am triggered in this way, I really believe I am bad for asking for something I want, for even wanting what I want - even if it is as simple as I want to eat at this restaurant over the one my wife wants to eat at. And at it's extreme I can't even ask for the simplest thing such as watching a specific show on tv.

[LonesomeTonight]

Originally Posted by stopdog

Is there a difference in "trigger" versus "uncomfortable"? I really am not sure I understand what is meant by trigger.

I'd say it's something that sets off a response that's out of proportion to what was said. Like, if the T said it to many other clients, it might not be a big deal. But for me, it's really upsetting, generally due to something from my past. Not at the level of PTSD (for me), but sort of like that?

[1stepatatime]

Very recently my therapist moved into a new office space. It is entirely different from where she was prior to the move, entirely different. The first time I went I was like “ okay, this is really nice, it has a great vibe, very hip”..etc... when I went this past week I almost felt threatened by this change. I felt like she no longer wanted to work with me, she is trying to attract younger clients.. ( totally my issues). It bothered me so much that I emailed her about it. She wrote me back and reassured me that she has not changed but her new space allowed me to see a little more of her.. I never thought I would have been so triggered by this change! I knew that it might feel weird at first but my insecurities crept up and showed themselves. I’m sure we’ll talk about it when we meet next week.

[Elio]

Originally Posted by 1stepatatime

Very recently my therapist moved into a new office space. It is entirely different from where she was prior to the move, entirely different. The first time I went I was like “ okay, this is really nice, it has a great vibe, very hip”..etc... when I went this past week I almost felt threatened by this change. I felt like she no longer wanted to work with me, she is trying to attract younger clients.. ( totally my issues). It bothered me so much that I emailed her about it. She wrote me back and reassured me that she has not changed but her new space allowed me to see a little more of her.. I never thought I would have been so triggered by this change! I knew that it might feel weird at first but my insecurities crept up and showed themselves. I’m sure we’ll talk about it when we meet next week.

My T moved from a clinic to private practice and I was worried she would change. She has changed some but not much. However, I can't touch any of the stuff there because it's her stuff verse before where it was the clinics (shared space). Moves are weird.

[nottrustin]

Originally Posted by stopdog

Is there a difference in "trigger" versus "uncomfortable"? I really am not sure I understand what is meant by trigger.

For me a trigger is when something causes me to go into my negative place of ruminating negative thoughts. It will trigger my Ptsd or very distorted thought of my self. If I am unable to get out of the negative thoughts pretty me it can cause my mood to plummet.

[RaineD]

If he says anything that could be interpreted as him thinking about terminating me.

[emeraldheart]

when he talks directly about "the incident"

[88Butterfly88]

T has a sign in her office that triggers me. It reads "What would Beyonce do?". It triggers me because it reminds me of the saying what would Jesus do and I had a traumatic experience at a church. So t takes down the sign before I come. She also tries not to say things such as "oh my God" or "God bless you" because it's also a trigger.