[jbug]

I am slowly getting used to my new clinic. I am still not used to being responded to in the same day. If I call to leave a message for the doctor or nurse its the next day before they get back to me. My T doesn't call me back at all. I don't like that at all. I'm used to having a T call me back if anything just to reassure me that I'm gonna make it.

Any suggestions on how to deal with all these changes without losing my mind?

Jbug

[Mouse_]

Talk about it with your T when you see him/her.

[Perna]

Your first sentence was good; you are slowly getting use to it. It will take time to get use to new routines of doing things and realizing the people don't care less, the clinic is just a bit bigger perhaps or less organized, external things?

When I'm having trouble in a new situation or feeling lonely or in need of support I often think of two "stories"/examples I've read in the far distant past.

One is about how babies have to learn to soothe themselves to sleep and that is difficult and takes their crying, etc. for a bit until they figure out how to maneuver from wakefulness to sleep. http://www.urbanext.uiuc.edu/baby/sleep_all_night.html

While the baby is learning it it isn't comfortable for them or their caretakers and the baby can't "see" or know what is happening like his parents can, is just part of the process. In some situations I figure I just have to be that baby and work with or endure what's going on with me at the moment and try to know I will come out okay, stronger for having had the experience and successfully maneuvered through it (even if I can't "see" it yet because I'm in it and not far enough along to be able to put it into words).

The other example is of a child learning to walk. It takes a lot of falling down to learn to walk. Parents (or their babies) don't decide after the baby falls a couple times, "Okay, that's enough, you can't walk and your falling down is hurting me." They have to keep trying to walk, even though they keep falling down. When something bothers me continuously or I keep "falling down" I am encouraged to try "harder" if I know it is something good for me or that I want by the example of learning to walk (or ride a bicycle, etc.). Maybe you can look at it taking a bit longer for them to get back in touch with you in that way? You've fallen down while learning to walk, you're really okay and in a moment they'll come along and pick you up again and put you on your feet near the coffee table where you can hold on and bounce up and down with those new knees and get ready to try again :-)

[jbug]

Thanks for the input ladies. The clinic I switched to is smaller but is much better quality than the bigger clinic I was going to. My T and I are getting down to the nitty gritty so to speak instead of the beginning niceities. I told her the other day I don't feel as if I'll ever be happy again and so she said next time we will talk about what it would be like if I was happy. I think she and I will work well together.

Jbug

[lauren_helene]

Hi Jannie, as much as I hate my T this week for not calling me back, I know he is doing that for me and not against me.

He's told me many times that he isn't rejecting/abandoning me so it is time to believe it.

I know you just started with your T but since she isn't calling back from the beginning, I bet this approach will work better for you in the long run.

I am reading 'get me out of here' and I'm learning so much about myself, I am like Rachel in so many ways. Have you read it?

[jbug]

I read that book over the summer and felt like I was reading about myself. I think I am reacting so hard to this because I don't adapt to change well and I find myself acting out trying to get Dr. McCain to respond but she isn't and it is freaking me out even more. Its like I'm screaming here can't you hear me?

Jbug

[pegasus]

I hear you janniebug, my T doesn't work at weekends so I know I have to wait for a weekday if I need to speak to him. That's real hard sometimes.

Maybe your T can come up with some ideas on coping next time you see her.

[smiley1984]

You should be really proud of yourself - you've changed clinics, seeing a new T who practices differently from your old one, and although you may have been upset/distressed in between appointments you have coped by yourself (a really important skill to have)
Some T's don't call back because clients need to learn how to get thru things by themselves,

[lauren_helene]

Jannie I understand. I have a huge list of acting out confessions to take to T's office tomorrow.

I'll be examining every facial expression, posture, tone etc. before I reveal it...I'm that scared.

I like the scream you posted, maybe I'll try that tomorrow.

[jbug]

Tommorrow will be a test. I am a giver by nature and any holiday that comes around requires recognition in my book. So today when I was at walmart I got some candy and little gift bags and made up little ghost candy bags for my instructors, my T, my doc's nurse, my doc and the support staff. We will see how they respond. Last time she was appreciative and said she'd sit down with some coffee and eat the muffins I brought her. I hope I don't make her uncomfortable but its just how I am.

Jbug

[lauren_helene]

I know Jannie, I gave my T coffee last Christmas and a print out of where to buy this cd of songs I talked about in session. He seemed to be interested in that.

If I ever get to the end of this process, I was planning on giving him my recipe on spaghetti gravy and meatballs. I never ever do this but that is because I can cook it for my friends and family. I can't do that with him and he was interested in what goes in it.

I said nope, not giving you that just like a whiney child...giggle

[sunrise]

That's really nice, janniebug--making up the candy bags for your T and others in your life. That is wonderful that you are a giver.

I have never given my T anything. Last week at my session, he had a huge bouquet of flowers there, still wrapped, and I wondered if another client had given it to him.

[jbug]

sunrise...I have some candy corn flavored taffy left over want some? I won't be able to eat it all and I'm sure my parents won't eat it either LOL.

Jbug

[sunrise]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
janniebug said:
sunrise...I have some candy corn flavored taffy left over want some?

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">Absolutely! Send it on over.