Couch 191: The Lazy Caterer Couch

SlumberKitty · Mar 15, 2019, 11:15 AM

It's donut Friday at work! HUGS Kit

SlumberKitty · Mar 15, 2019, 11:15 AM

I see my T on Monday. I've done maybe four journal entries. I think what I've written is good--it's not crap--but I just haven't written a lot. A little nervous about that. Like maybe I'm going to fail the homework expectation! HUGS Kit

NP_Complete · Mar 15, 2019, 11:56 AM

Something got dredged up in yesterday's session, an event involving my husband from long ago that was so painful and fills me with shame. We talked about it, I cried a lot. I left session and sobbed in the car on the way back to work. I thought I could just power through and went back into work but ended up crying at my desk for another hour until I gave up and left. Before I left, I sent an email to my therapist saying I was in a lot of pain and I wished he could comfort me but I know he can't. I feel kind of stupid for telling him that. I went home, ate some comfort ice cream, got an email response that was okay but feel kind of mixed emotions about, and fell asleep for a few hours. Of course then I had trouble falling asleep last night because of the nap. I hoped that after some sleep I would feel at least a little better about things, but I still feel incredibly down today.

Mar 15, 2019, 12:18 PM

My 70 hour work week starts Sunday. I’m working till 5 today then just have tonight and tomorrow to get my cleaning, laundry and errands done and prepare everything For the week. I do have clean a bit this weekend because the lady I hired to do the deep clean on my home is not coming until the 28th.

Im diving in head first. Somebody toss me a float? I don’t know how to swim.

unaluna · Mar 15, 2019, 12:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lemoncake

I was mean and he said some of the things I said hurt him and feel shame.

How transference worked for me: once i saw the real difference between my t and my abusive parent - like what you say here, that t reacted to ME where the parent did not? - i started to be able to treat them like two different people.

Mar 15, 2019, 12:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jersey 4

My 70 hour work week starts Sunday. I’m working till 5 today then just have tonight and tomorrow to get my cleaning, laundry and errands done and prepare everything For the week. I do have clean a bit this weekend because the lady I hired to do the deep clean on my home is not coming until the 28th.

Im diving in head first. Somebody toss me a float? I don’t know how to swim.

I used to be a lifeguard/swimming instructor..... tossing you a flotation ring....

ScarletPimpernel · Mar 15, 2019, 03:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lemoncake

Has there been a new incident or the old one involving the car?

New incident:

Possible trigger:

Sister went back to boyfriend after the birth of her baby. They got into a fight a couple weeks ago. He called the police on her to try to get her in trouble for violating the restraining order, but instead the cops tried to arrest him because they saw the bruises on my sister and he had a warrant out for his arrest. He climbed out the bedroom window and the cops chased after him with dogs and helicopters. They found him the next day back at his house. So he went to jail. My sister asked for the charges to be dropped. So the boyfriend got out of jail. CPS got involved because the babies were present during the time the police were there. Since my sister is trying to stay on his family's good side, she's refusing to tell anyone what happened. His family is also refusing to cooperate. So last night they took the babies. And today I got a phone call from CPS, and they are looking to place the babies in my care.

I'm so overwhelmed!

LonesomeTonight · Mar 15, 2019, 03:31 PM

Oh wow, Scarlet, that does sound incredibly overwhelming! I was wondering if they could try to place the babies with you...would you get any money for their care, since I guess it would be a foster care situation?

And wow, dogs and helicopters? I guess because of the warrant...it sounds like your sister would need to choose the babies or her boyfriend...Hugs...

DP_2017 · Mar 15, 2019, 03:41 PM

Going way out of my comfort zone tomorrow. A former friend (Well we are still FB friends but havent really spoken in years) invited me to her bowling birthday party. Well I cant bowl from surgery restrictions still but I agreed to come chat a while, and meet her friends and her nephew. It will only be an hour, but I'm still very anxious. I hate socializing lol

Lemoncake · Mar 15, 2019, 04:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stopdog

I don't think one is responsible for the feelings of others particularly a therapist -and if a therapist gets hurt by what a client says - that is on the therapist not the client. I also think therapists say those sorts of things to be manipulative at the client and not because they are particularly true. On the other hand, if you meant to hurt the therapist - then good job - I think it is hard to do and one should take credit for accomplishing what they set out to do (I am not being sarcastic - I mean it)

It was easy for me to tell him in session I hated him, but it didn't feel right for me. I sent him an email to apologize.

Lemoncake · Mar 15, 2019, 04:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DP_2017

Going way out of my comfort zone tomorrow. A former friend (Well we are still FB friends but havent really spoken in years) invited me to her bowling birthday party. Well I cant bowl from surgery restrictions still but I agreed to come chat a while, and meet her friends and her nephew. It will only be an hour, but I'm still very anxious. I hate socializing lol

I can understand your anxiety. Maybe you could ask her how many people are expected to come?

Mar 15, 2019, 04:03 PM

My silly printer has a paper jam again. Yee ha. Trying to print some descriptions of different poetry forms. I should just buy a comprehensive book or something.

Lemoncake · Mar 15, 2019, 04:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel

New incident:

Possible trigger:

Sister went back to boyfriend after the birth of her baby. They got into a fight a couple weeks ago. He called the police on her to try to get her in trouble for violating the restraining order, but instead the cops tried to arrest him because they saw the bruises on my sister and he had a warrant out for his arrest. He climbed out the bedroom window and the cops chased after him with dogs and helicopters. They found him the next day back at his house. So he went to jail. My sister asked for the charges to be dropped. So the boyfriend got out of jail. CPS got involved because the babies were present during the time the police were there. Since my sister is trying to stay on his family's good side, she's refusing to tell anyone what happened. His family is also refusing to cooperate. So last night they took the babies. And today I got a phone call from CPS, and they are looking to place the babies in my care.

I'm so overwhelmed!

I hope you can look after them, and provide them a safe place which they deserve. Domestic violence is so damaging.

Lemoncake · Mar 15, 2019, 04:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArtieSwimsOn

My silly printer has a paper jam again. Yee ha. Trying to print some descriptions of different poetry forms. I should just buy a comprehensive book or something.

Try Fox books! (A you've got mail reference)

But yep it might be cheaper if your doing industrial scale printing!

DP_2017 · Mar 15, 2019, 04:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lemoncake

I can understand your anxiety. Maybe you could ask her how many people are expected to come?

4 besides her family.... which is also 4. I just hate groups with people I don't know in them. I either talk to much and say really stupid things...or I become very quiet and say next to nothing. I really want to work on my social stuff this year though

Lemoncake · Mar 15, 2019, 04:14 PM

I went for a massage and feel so much lighter, but I did feel like crying at one point and have previously cried all the way through another.

LostOnTheTrail · Mar 15, 2019, 04:14 PM

@Lemoncake - Kudos for the 'You've Got Mail' reference. I should watch that again, but in my head it's a Christmas film.

I have requested a meeting at work tomorrow about the famous local theatre visit. Anybody up for pocket riding? Meeting will be around 1pm GMT.

SlumberKitty · Mar 15, 2019, 04:18 PM

I'll pocket ride LostOnTheTrail.

Lemoncake · Mar 15, 2019, 04:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LostOnTheTrail

@Lemoncake - Kudos for the 'You've Got Mail' reference. I should watch that again, but in my head it's a Christmas film.

I have requested a meeting at work tomorrow about the famous local theatre visit. Anybody up for pocket riding? Meeting will be around 1pm GMT.

I love the fact you actually watched it! Tom hanks is awesome.

Other movies I love: The store around the corner, a little princess (1995), little women.

I'm always here:

LostOnTheTrail · Mar 15, 2019, 04:26 PM

Have you seen Sleepless in Seattle? It's next on my list, but I'm not sure whether the bereavement theme would be rough at the moment.

DP_2017 · Mar 15, 2019, 04:29 PM

I love You've Got Mail but def not a Christmas movie there is only brief christmas scenes in there.

Tom Hanks has some good stuff. Sleepless is a classic.... but I really liked "The Terminal"

DP_2017 · Mar 15, 2019, 04:33 PM

Has anyone used Uber or Lyft? Are they safe? Is one better than the other? I'm trying to finalize my plans/options for my LA program in September and I wont be renting a care there, I wont drive in LA

SlumberKitty · Mar 15, 2019, 04:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DP_2017

Has anyone used Uber or Lyft? Are they safe? Is one better than the other? I'm trying to finalize my plans/options for my LA program in September and I wont be renting a care there, I wont drive in LA

Los Angeles, San Francisco and one other city, it might have been San Diego, had the most aggressive drivers in California. However, Wednesdays were the least aggressive days in Los Angeles, while Fridays were the most aggressive. What days do I usually drive in Los Angeles? Fridays. Fabulous.

SlumberKitty · Mar 15, 2019, 05:00 PM

My boss left crying today because she was in so much pain. I felt really bad for her. Maybe that's why she's been kind of mean to me all week. She was crying and she kept apologizing to me and she was trying to get the checks done, and she couldn't do it, and I was like, I'll do them, don't worry about it. Then she cried more. I felt sort of helpless. I couldn't do anything about her pain.

DP_2017 · Mar 15, 2019, 05:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

Los Angeles, San Francisco and one other city, it might have been San Diego, had the most aggressive drivers in California. However, Wednesdays were the least aggressive days in Los Angeles, while Fridays were the most aggressive. What days do I usually drive in Los Angeles? Fridays. Fabulous.

Where I will be is about 30 minutes outside LA but I am flying into LA. The email for the program says you can ride share with other students and you can plan that in the lobby during the welcome event but that terrifies me. Talking to complete strangers to ride with them? Ugh... this is gonna be such a comfort zone push for me

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